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Sweet Seals For You, Always
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her

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$LAYYYTER
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@stygain

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Is this a midwest VSCO girl?
So thereās this huge dudebro in my class, who, yesterday, sat next to me. And Iām sitting there sweating because like⦠Iām wearing my shirt with the lesbian flag on it, and heās the most popular jock in school, and always has this look on his face that say āI can and will kill youā. He looks me up and down, stares at me for a minute and then goes,Ā āSo. Girls in skirts and long socks, am I right?ā
To which I nodded solemnly, both out of agreement, surprise and also a healthy amount of awkward fear. He nodded and went,Ā āYou get it.ā
I said,Ā āYep.ā He fistbumped me, and on went our lives.
Oh! I forgot to mention! I saw him at lunch the same day, and he ran up to me, tapped me on the shoulder, pointed at this super sweet girl who comes to GSA and asked if sheās gay. I told him he should ask her because thatās not my place and he said he would.
I thought that would be the end of it.
Except ten minutes later he came back and told me he found out (sheās bi) and that both of us have a shot. I saidĀ āYou more than me.ā because heās attractive and popular.Ā
But this wholesome dumbass looked really confused and asked,Ā āBecause Iām tall?ā
I love him oh my God what an ally
Spooky Shopkeeper: The price may be more than you expect to pay.
Me: Yes, I know how US taxes work, too.

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everytime I hear about children of the corn I think about the guy I met at comic con who actually lived in the town they filmed that movie at, and on the farm where they filmed in the corn. he was a teenager at the time and him and his friends would get drunk on moonshine and rustle the corn and let the air out of the tires of the production teamās trailers and shit. and now thereās Wikipedia pages about how the children of the corn set was haunted and they thought they angered god but it was really just drunk hillbillies
I donāt like adding to posts but I also have a funny story like this, so I was watching the movie the Blair witch which takes place in burkettsville maryland, which to me is so funny because that is were my grandfather lives and the town is literally just old people and cows with their main street consisting of a post office. Well anyway he told me that after it came out people were coming in like bus loads to the town to find the witch and my grandfather lives up in the Mountain area and people were up in his property trying to find the witch and it made him angry so he went out and hung up stick people and stacked rocks and it freaked the people out so they started thinking something was out there when really it was my 80 year old Italian grandpa who wanted people out of his woods.
We had ghost hunters come to a historic house in my town to film and if you think every high school kid in town respectfully stayed at home that night instead of going to fuck up that filming youāre dead wrong.
this is comforting, actually, sometimes paranormal things are just a bunch of bored people dicking around in the woods.
New favorite cryptid: locals

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if youāre american and coming to australia, Iām gonna go ahead and say that you should be 100 percent way more worried about being king hit by a dude namedĀ ādaneā in a bintang singlet than any fucking spiders that exist here
what does this say in english
āGood sir, if you are a resident of the United States of America and coming to visit the sunny land of Australia, allow me to inform you that you should be rather more concerned about being sucker punched by a gentleman namedĀ āDaneā who is likely to be seen wearing a wifebeater with a beer company logo on it than by any of the dangerous spiders that exist on this lovely continentā.
ok so what does it say in american
āYouāre more likely to get sucker punched/cold-cocked by an asshole than you are to be bitten by a spiderā.
thank you
Well rattle my spoons, that donāt make a lick of sense. Wot in tarnation does this hootenanny say?
āIf ya mosey on by Australia, you best be fixinā to get to some fisticuffs more'n checkin fer spiders.ā
This is a Rosetta Stone for a single language
the DELIVERY
Shakespeare would write this
we make a lot of jokes at the expense of furries on this site but let me be clear, if there were a couple of furries on the sonic design team we wouldnāt be in this mess
Bringing this back for the cats trailer
mikeās hard look at yourself
visual pun

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Sigourney Weaver promotional shots for the film āAliens,ā 1986. Photo credit:Ā Ken Regan/Camera 5
beautiful femme/femme coupleā¦..always a wondeful thing to see two lesbians in love <3
Too depressed to be awake? Not depressed enough for a Depression Nap� Welcome to Existential Crisis Wrapped in Blanket!
Raise your hand if you have ever felt personally victimized by this post