and caleb and beau are supposed to be the smart ones 😂
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PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

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and caleb and beau are supposed to be the smart ones 😂

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commission for @sirkai , a toast to not quite health
important gossip between heads of state
she
this bit in guards! guards!:
Lady Ramkin made herself a cup of cocoa and listened to the rain gurgling in the pipes outside. She slipped off the hated dancing shoes, which even she was prepared to concede were like a pair of pink canoes. But nobbyless obligay, as the funny little sergeant would say, and as the last representative of one of Ankh-Morpork’s oldest families she’d had to go to the victory ball to show willing. Lord Vetinari seldom had balls. There was a popular song about it, in fact. But now it was going to be balls all the way.
lol.
also, i have a headcanon that at some point, vetinari is compelled to organize some kind of ball, but it turns out the facilities at the palace just aren't up to snuff at all. perhaps he's left them in disrepair ever since the Dragon Incident -- really! that long! or just uses it as extra storage space. there's some bits & pieces about him maintaining the Bloody Stupid Johnson garden, and the zoo, and the racehorse stable, just because he's reluctant to change things; & that he keeps leonard around just because he likes hanging onto anything that might be useful later. so i think the palace unfortunately has a bit of an Old Furniture Problem bc vetinari is not in favor of throwing things out. thus -- it ends up in the ballroom. thus -- there is no ballroom, so much as there's a very big, fancy storage room
so, anyway, upon being compelled to arrange a ball for visiting dignitaries, he's got no place to put it. luckily, it turns out sybil, although about as much of a packrat, has managed to maintain a fairly decent ballroom at ramkin manor, it'll be lovely with a bit of fresh paint & some airing out (to get rid of the dragon smell). it's a great idea. the big fancy ball goes great. vimes shows up for about half the night before slinking off, sybil charms everyone to bits, vimes & sybil & vetinari are all sort of in the capacity of being each other's plus-ones...
the only drawback is that, from then on, the popular song aforementioned (upon the topic of vetinari "seldom had balls") has its lyrics updated to state that in fact, the duke & duchess of ankh hold lord vetinari's balls
art by The Baby Goat

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Well.
Anyone who doesn't think the OT3 is our endgame here can go argue with Agatha.
...good luck!
(they're too damn cute, I can't take it)
it's so fucked that they're keeping katie ledecky on land to keep winning olympic medals instead of releasing her back into the ocean
counterpoint: she was born in land-locked washington DC, therefore she is clearly a freshwater creature. release her into the potomac.
@nonasuch
Since the Chesapeake is a tidal estuary with zones of fresh, brackish, and salt water that vary by season, Katie Ledecky is actually well-adapted for a range of salinities!
Olympians really are just like that
Snoop Dogg watching the Skateboarding finals with an unidentified man
“Why is snoop dogg at the Olympics-“
WRONG QUESTION!
WHY ISNT MARTHA STEWART THERE WITH HIM?
she is! she’s joining him for the equestrian events because, and I am quoting her directly, “Snoop is afraid of horses.”
Update:
this is 100% real btw
In Paris this week, he said: “I am interested in the horses that dance and I want to give them some carrots and apples … make sure they’re fed before they do their thang.”
Stewart explained the pair’s dressage plan.
“Snoop called me and said he knows I know horses, and he’s a little fearful of horses,” the businesswoman, philanthropist and octogenarian Sports Illustrated swimsuit cover model told NBC on Friday.
“I’m still scared of horses,” Snoop said.
“Have you ever ridden a horse?” Stewart asked.
“No,” said Snoop. “I’m scared.”
“So we’re gonna do dressage,” Stewart said.
This is so lovely and heartwarming that I almost didn't notice that Snoop's wearing knee high spats
EPILOGUE
He got to meet the horses!!
He even got to feed them carrots like he wanted to, even though he seems to be nervous! Such courage and valor! /Gen!
This is clearly the coolest day of that white guy's life. It's the coolest day of the horse's life. This is the coolest day of all of our lives. Mr Dogg, thank you for being who you are.
Can we just take a sec to also thank Mr. Snoop Dog for saying that he was scared to do something and called a friend to help him. And then did the scary thing. I think that admitting you’re scared of something takes courage and inner strength.

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the two czech tennis players who won gold in doubles after breaking up is soooo funny like who’s sponsoring these olympics mr ao3 himself. or perhaps luca guadagnino
"We are such professionals that we broke up precisely so that we could fully concentrate on this medal, we succeeded and we will see what happens after that"
Sport's rpf writers COME GET YA'LL JUICE!
Her 💛
can you believe they awarded the olympic torch for best in yaoi. so happy sports are growing and evolving
The steamy HBO Max drama about closeted ice hockey stars has been an unexpected hit.
The Olympics are all about finding out that there are people 16 and older who were born in years that would shock you to your core
You can’t possibly be 16 and born in 2009. I graduated middle school that year. There cannot be adults who can’t remember Obama’s win. That’s impossible. It’s not true. Big Olympics is lying to me.
Impeccable music choice here:

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