I Eat Stuff

What happened to you last night?

Waking up and not remembering the night before is nothing crazy, it's happened before. You go hard on a night out and wake up groggy, blank spots in your memory, a bit bloated too. I mean it makes sense - given the amount you drank - that you'd be wearing the effects on your abdomen the next morning. That's always been the trade-off in your mind: you get the fun night out and the joy of being drunk, but the punishment is the next morning with the bloated belly and the leftover sickness.

Fuck it, take a painkiller and wear a baggy sweatshirt, no one will notice.

That is, until you're going about your day and your stomach starts having little outbursts. A gurgle when you're in a quiet subway carriage, a growl when you're in the middle of speaking to someone, a churn while you wait for your coffee order. It must be the leftover remnants of those cocktail ingredients - you know the ones that you barely pay attention to as you just check that your favorite spirit is contained in it. You've really gotta figure out which one of those ingredients makes your guts do backflips like this. Did you eat anything last night? Maybe your stomach is complaining because you've fed it nothing but alcohol since yesterday afternoon.

You should probably eat something, but this bloat is so persistent you don't feel like you can stomach anything. You already feel full, like your belly is already packed. Obviously that's not the case, unless someone - I dunno - fed you in your sleep or something. You try to eat a protein bar and your intestines immediately moan in protest. You force yourself to swallow it and immediately feel nauseous again.

Is this normal?

Does this usually happen?

You swear that before your stomach has eased off by the afternoon but it's only getting louder, more bubbly, more nauseous. Something's wrong. Is it? Or is your body just aging out of these late night benders?

Your stomach tenses. You cover your mouth. Oh god, are you really about to throw up right here in front of everyone? You try to calmly and discreetly make your way out of the room. You hope no one notices the dire state you're in. Luckily there's no one in the bathroom as you enter. Your stomach makes another intense churning sound. These really are more intense than usual. You check over your shoulder to make double sure there's no one else in here before you lift up your baggy sweatshirt to assess the damage.

What the fuck…?

This can't be right. Your belly is even bigger than this morning. You haven't even eaten anything yet. I mean - you had that protein bar. Could that really be it? One protein bar? No way. Your bellybutton is even noticeably tighter. You haven't exactly had visible abs for a while but what's left of them are stretched out sideways over your swollen gut. Could it be gas? God it feels heavy though, doesn't it? Your belly feels like it's got a bowling ball inside of it.

Then you see it. The movement. Your whole belly moves. You don't believe it at first. You can't believe it. It must have been a muscle spasm. But when it happens again and you see your whole swollen belly lurch, when you see the sides bulge outwards and squirm upwards with a sickening squelch…you can't ignore it.

This isn't normal.

This is something else.

🌙 I just discovered something dangerous: the sound of my tummy when it accepts a gift from a stranger… It's like the roar of a satisfied dragon🐉

Last night: Whole pizza + ice cream… The result? Burps that made my phone shake and a belly so full I swore I'd never do it again… (I lied. Today I want more) 🍕🤤👅

Confession: I love feeling like someone out there is choosing what I'll devour… Will you be the one whispering "keep eating" to me while I moan between bites?

If your fantasy includes: ✅ Hearing me swallow what you crave ✅ Watching my belly button disappear under the rolls ✅ Receiving a thank-you audio (between burps)

I hope you’re all very happy with yourselves

Because I just ate 30 fucking tacos, all in one sitting. What in the actual fuck 😩😩😩

How is it even possible to eat this much fucking food in one go? Like I really fucking walked in, sat in a booth, and literally ate tacos for almost 2 hours straight. I was so fucking full in that booth after slamming down that last taco. I felt full after 24 but figured I could bring any extra home, but nope I just kept chomping and pushing because dumb fat hog sees food on his plate so he eats it.

My gut is so fucking firm right now, my belly button feels so fucking right and shallow. Probably cause there’s 30 FUCKING TACOS stuffed in it. I feel gigantic, I guess all that eating over the weekend did stretch my gut out and now I’m even more fucked with how much food I want/need to fill me to the brim. I just keep eating and stretching my gut out, it’s no wonder I’m getting such a monster ball gut 😩

This was such a crazy thing to do, especially when I remember eating a dozen was a goal when I first started eating here. Now I’ve more than doubled that and my gut is looking more engorged with food than ever before. What a stupid irresponsible amount of fucking food I crammed all into my belly. Like this was well over 3k calories in a single meal and now my gut is distended so far out in front of me right now 🥵

God just keep the tacos coming, keep serving them to me until I literally can’t force another bite down. Fill me to the brim with tacos until I’m about to pop, and then push even more on me. Watch me groan in pain, holding my gut with one hand but still stuffing the food down with the other. Make me beg for them to stop even though all you’re doing is just placing food in front of me, it’s my own greed and gluttony that keeps overfeeding me. Can’t stop stuffing my fat face, my gut keeps growing bigger and fatter but I just keep fucking eating.

Tell me if this is a stupid amount of food and how fat I am if you agree 👀