Stop Layla

"Dick -- oh, Dick! I must -- get -- Dick! (pant, pant) I must!"

Tragically, no one could hear the truck backing up.

I'm trying to give up sexual innuendos. But it's hard. So hard.

Do you like it rough? I thought you'd never ask.

Trinity Church: Masturbation is Satan's Typewriter

20 year old "Brony" arrested for bestiality.

I am super lazy today, which is like normal lazy but I am also wearing a cape.

Lost it in Nom!

You may be high, but you'll never be Johnny Cash, eating cake in a bush high.

You better not pout, you better not cry, you better not scream, I'm going in dry.

Trying to understand the behavior of some people is like trying to smell the color 9.

How did the government shutdown end? "So then I hid Boehner's bourbon."