super soldier

People always talk about that profound moment when they realized the direction of their life; the moment when the stars align and they know what they want to do for the rest of their life. That moment never came for Bucky. He had always known what he wanted to do, since he was a small kid in pull ups running around the apartment building he lived in with his best friend playing with plastic space ships. He wanted to be in space; he wanted to explore and travel the endless frontier that stretched on endlessly.

His best friend, Steve Rogers, shared the same dream and it surprised no one when they both announced that they were going to join Starfleet when they grown ups and own their own ship. But that dream seemed nearly impossible for Steve to achieve. He was too skinny, too frail, and too sickly to even be considered for Starfleet. His disabilities had never stopped him before though, constantly getting into fights with kids through middle school and high school, because he couldn’t stand bullies and had high morals. It had always been up to Bucky to follow after Steve and make sure he didn’t get his ass completely handed to him.

When the time came they both applied to Starfleet; Steve, unsurprisingly, had been rejected for various medical reasons while Bucky had been accepted. Bucky had thrown the letter in the trash without telling Steve. There was no way in hell he was leaving behind his best friend and he was determined to make sure they made their dream come true their own way.

When Steve found the letter in the trash the next day, he had yelled at him. He told him he was stupid as hell to let go of his dream that easily and he was not going to let Bucky do something as dumb as not go to Starfleet just because he himself couldn’t go. He had fought back at first, but fighting Steve was as pointless as trying to carry on a conversation with a brick wall.

They said nothing to each other as Bucky had packed; and Steve had made sure that he did pack just so he could make sure that his friend was actually leaving. 

Bucky had hugged a teary eyed Mrs. Rogers goodbye and after she had retreated back into the building he finally turned back to Steve. “Don’t do anything stupid while I’m away.” Bucky swooped in for a long hug. After three beats he let go and added with a grin, “Punk. Better find a way to catch up with me soon or I’ll leave you behind in the dust.” They both knew it was a lie. There was no way Bucky would go up into space without Steve. His dream wasn’t just about exploring space after all; it was about exploring space with Steve.

Before he ended up making even more of a fool of himself Bucky climbed into his taxi and left Steve behind.

Bucky was sent all the way across the country to compete in the Academy entrance competition exams; after a person had sent in their application and were accepted, they were forced to compete in a series of exams and the people with the passing scores were admitted into the Academy. If you failed these tests then you had the option of trying once more or packing up your bags and going home. Bucky passed all of his tests with flying colors. He had been waiting for this opportunity all of his life and there was no way he was going to let some stupid basic tests trip him up. After passing the entrance competition exams, he was sent to complete six weeks of the preparatory program before he could be sent to the actual Academy.

During the first week there, he met a woman named Natasha Romaova (he called her Natalia instead because she was originally from Russia and Russian was the only other language he was fluent in besides Common and English). The rest of his eventual friends, Clint Barton, Bruce Banner, Sam Wilson, Thor Odinson, and Jane Foster, he met through Natasha. He liked them all well enough; they were loud and rambuncious and fun, albeit hard to get used to at first. But once he did, he began to enjoy having them all around. Bucky knew that if Steve had been there he would’ve instantly loved them and the reverse would be true for the others as well. It was hard not to love Steve once you got to know him.

He met the Carter sisters at a bar when he was hanging out with his new group of friends, after his failed attempts of hitting on them. Sharon had forgiven him for his cheesy pick up lines somewhat easily while her older sister, Peggy, had not been so easy to win over. Eventually, they warmed up to him but Peggy was still a bit more catious whenever he was around. It was later revealed that they were also friends with Natasha and they were adopted into the group just as Bucky had been.

After six weeks of excruciatingly boring classes they were finally shipped off to the Space Academy in San Fransico. 

Once the cadets arrived they were forced to seperate from their group of friends and find out their dorm locations; when Bucky had arrived at his dorm though, his dormmate was no where to be found. It hadn’t bothered him really until he had gone out for a little bit and then come back to find out the man he was going to be sharing a room with for the next four years was Tony Fucking Stark. After a moment of simply staring at each other, Bucky had closed the door, taken out his communicator and called Natasha. “Natalia. Emergency meeting. Now. Meet me at that bar near the quad in ten.” 

Natasha came into the bar along with Clint, which was no surprise to Bucky. He would’ve been more surprised if he hadn’t been trailing behind her like a puppy. “What’s the emergency James?” Natasha refused to call Bucky by his nickname and always refferred to him by his first name. He didn’t mind all that much truth be told; now if someone like Clint started calling him James, he’d probably end up getting punched. Bucky was not brave enough or suicidal enough to even attempt to punch Natasha. He had only known her for a little over a month now, but the woman could be terrifying when she wanted to be. “Yeah,” Clint added, “Make it fast. That new episode of Gav’s Anatomy is coming on and I want to see if Doctor Gav and nurse Prinadora finally get together. I’ve been waiting four seasons -” Natasha elbowed him in the side making Clint wheeze and hunch over. She turned back to Bucky and raised an eyebrow for him to continue. After throwing a ‘you’re stupid as fuck’ look Clint’s way Bucky said, “Get this. Tony Stark is my fucking dormmate. What the actual fuck am I supposed to do with a multi-billionare rooming with me for the next four years?” Steve would probably get a kick out this if he were here, Bucky thought somewhat sourly. A now recovered Clint sputtered incredously. “Seriously? That’s what you called us down here for? Because you have a fucking multi-billionare as your roommate? Dude, that’s like….like..complaining about having a harem of women wanting to fuck you! Get buddy buddy with him and then maybe he’ll give you a house in Malibu or Milan or something.” 

"I didn’t call you down. I asked for Natalia.” He turned his eyes to Natasha imploringly. But instead of giving him the answers he wanted, she shrugged her shoulders elegantly instead. “Clint’s somewhat right. When it comes to roommates you could have worse. The only bad things he’s done are a few scandals revolving around women for the most part. One of his close friends is my dormmate and she says that he’s not as nearly as bad as the tabloids make him out to be.” 

"You guys are missing the issue here. If he gets angry at me all he has to do is call his daddy up, say, "Destroy Bucky Barnes," and I’m dead meat. He’ll probably have an assassin kill me and make it look like a car accident."

Natasha simply rolled her eyes while Clint snorted. “Then don’t make him angry, James. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going back to my room to get ready for Monday classes.” With that, she turned on her heels and walked out of the bar with Clint following close behind. 

As it turned out, Tony Stark, wasn’t so bad after all, Bucky soon discovered. In fact they had a lot in common, including their personalities, and soon they became extremely close friends. He ended up introducing Tony to the rest of his friends and they ended up accepting him into ranks as easily as Bucky had predicted. After about a month of being at Starfleet Academy their relationship began to change into something else. When neither of them were in a relationship - if you could call it that - or busy fucking other people then they’d be fucking each other. It was a rather easy routine to slip into and soon their friends-with-benefits relationship became a regular thing. 

Things never truly got serious though; neither Bucky nor Tony seemed to want that kind of thing and they were just fine with having the occasional fuck every now and again. None of his relationships were complicated; they were simple and easy and Bucky loved it to put it simply. 

School was also going even better than Bucky had expected. Surprisingly enough, he enjoyed most of all of his classes and whenever he struggled in one of them he just went to Bruce or Tony for help. It was one of the many perks of being friends with geniuses.

Bucky had been at school for nearly four months without incident; that all changed one saturday night when the cadets all decided to meet at the bar near the quad. It was becoming somewhat of a habit now for all them to meet at the bar every other Saturday when no one was busy, just to catch up with each other and have a good time. 

When Bucky and Tony arrived at the bar, it was packed, but the others had already arrived and grabbed their usual spot in the back. After about an hour of heavy drinking did Bucky finally notice that someone was missing and he narrowed his eyes. “Where’s Sam?” 

"Son of Wil is talking with his new friend at the bar," declared a loud and drunk Thor who was already leaning heavily on a poor Jane Foster. The man really was a lightweight despite his large body and alien origins. Bucky turned around in his seat to sweep his eyes across the bar until he finally found Sam standing and talking to a man he was sure he had never seen before. Something almost seemed familiar about him but Bucky was too drunk to care and didn’t want to put much thought into anything else besides enjoying the view in front of him. His eyes travelled appreciatively down the strangers backside until they finally landed on his ass. Bucky whirled around and finished the rest of his drink in one drink then turned to Tony with a grin. “I hope you and that red hed are still fucking each other because if not, looks like you’re gonna be sleeping outside on the floor.” 

Bucky stood up and made his way through the crowd to Sam and his friend. “Hey Sam, why haven’t you introduced me to your good looking new friend yet? Trying to keep him locked away from the rest of us because you’re embarrassed of all of us?” Sam opened his mouth, no doubt to reply with something cutting and witty when the guy turned around. 

For Bucky this was a very reachable dream, but for Steve, well he just had to wish a little harder. As they grew older, the blond's list of medical problems grew longer than his own arm, and the only people who didn't tell him to give up were his best friend and his mother. But Steve Rogers was the kind of person who never stopped getting up no matter how many times you pushed him down. 

Even when he got his rejection letter from Starfleet Academy he didn't despair, okay, he might have cried a little, but he still knew that one day he'd go into space. He'd rushed over to Bucky's to see if he got his letter but he wasn't home. Steve was waiting in his room when he spotted it poking out of the bin. He let off at Bucky as soon as he got in the door; how stupid did someone have to be to turn down Starfleet? 

It was only later, when he thought it through, that Steve realised that he and Bucky were going to be apart for the first time in their lives. It was a stupid thing to worry about, Steve thought to himself, he was a grown man. He didn't need someone else to look after him, and that may have been true, but he did need Bucky.

On the day Bucky left for Starfleet, Steve made sure he was composed, he even smiled as he hugged Bucky goodbye, a hug that was too short by both of their reckonings. "How can I? You're taking all the stupid with you." He'd decided to keep the chat to mocking, if he tried to be sincere he'd probably just end up crying. "Jerk. Oh, I will. I might even beat you there!" Mrs. Rogers would swear that Steve cried for a whole week.

A couple months after Bucky left Steve saw an advertisement in the paper for Starfleet volunteers. He'd run to the research lab so quickly he'd forgotten he owned a bike. The man in charge was Dr. Abraham Erskine, and he took a particular shining to Steve, saying that he was looking for qualities beyond the physical. He could see something in Steve, a greatness that only a few people had ever noticed. Steve alone was selected for the program.

They told him that Starfleet was becoming concerned that more and more of it's missions were being met with violence, violence from other species that were much stronger than humans. Starfleet didn't want to join this violence but if they had to, they'd create their own super humans to fight back. The Doctor told Steve that the serum they had developed affected everything about you, he had chosen Steve not for his willingness to fight, but for his heart.

The effects of the serum had exceed everyone's expectations, and as soon as Mrs. Rogers stopped hugging him Steve was shipped out for Starfleet. It would be hard catching up when they were halfway through the year, but the blond didn't mind the work load, he'd made it. Proving all those people wrong and defying the odds to achieve his dream, it'd be a kindness to say he was smug about it.

Steve wanted to go and find Bucky as soon as he arrived, to hug him and kiss him and make sure he hadn't done anything too stupid while he'd been away. But he'd changed a lot, and he didn't know if the brunet would approve of what he'd done, he certainly wouldn't appreciate not being told about it, not that much thought had go into the decision anyway. Steve didn't even know how he was supposed to find Bucky, the academy was huge.

Luckily his roommate was there when he arrived, a nice guy called Sam Wilson who Steve hit it off with right away. By the time Sam dragged the other to the bar it was like they'd been friends for years. They'd had a few drinks when one of Sam's friends came up behind them and started flirting with Steve. This sort of thing was happening a lot since the serum, one of the many things the blond was having trouble adjusting to, but flirting back was always easier with a guy.

Bucky forced himself to stay calm. He wasn’t there anymore. He had escaped. He was with one of the most important people in the world right now. He was safe. He took deep, relaxing breaths until he finally brought himself back down from the near panic attack. When he felt okay enough, he wrapped his arms around Steve’s frame and buried his nose into his shoulder. It was odd but no matter how far away from home they were Steve always retained the scent of his house. It made Bucky long to be back at Steve’s house on a Saturday night, watching bad movies together while Mrs. Rogers cooked them dinner. She never let Bucky leave the house without his stomach filled with food, not that he had ever complained. 

"It’s not your fault. I shouldn’t have been such a gullible idiot and gone with them without any proof." His voice came out muffled because his face was still buried into Steve’s shoulder. He snorted at the line trying to not lead on to how much it meant to him that Steve had parroted that line back at him. He could still remember gripping Steve’s shoulder on a rainy afternoon on his porch after a particurally nasty fight and saying those words to him. “‘Till the end of the line pal." 

"You are a bit of an idiot. But a lovable idiot nonetheless." Steve was still blaming himself, not that he'd mention that right now. He didn't want to have an argument. It was just like when he used to get himself in stupid street fights and Bucky would always have to fish him out. But the Brunet would always come up worse for wear and Steve would feel so bad as they sat on his mum's counter and she cleaned them up. This was much bigger than a street fight though, this was horrible people doing horrible things to muggleborns and getting away with it. Steve was going to sort this whole thing out, but that could wait.