4 february. the snow was still melting. on the bird feeders out the back were four goldfinches and some siskins, as well as the usual blackbirds, robins and blue tits.
dad picked up granny on his way back from work and we had pumpkin soup for lunch. she had bought the times in windsor for some reason and so we had a look at the crossword together. there was a ‘quick cryptic’ which we did a few clues on, and i got SADOMASOCHISTIC on the regular cryptic. she said she liked my new jumper.
we drove back over to sunningdale. grandad’s ashes were in a blue box in what looked like a giant wine bottle gift bag. we walked around to the base of the redwood tree in the churchyard. it is on quite a big hillock now, which i guess must be from all of the years of dropped leaves. granny’s mum’s ashes were scattered here in 1986. the paper bag inside the box was stapled shut. we all took turns to scatter them: first granny, then dad, jane, me and mum, and then granny again. i think granny said something to grandad as she was scattering them. jane and i cried and i put my arm around her.
we went to the nags. i still wish that they hadn’t ripped so much out when they refurbished. it would have been nice to keep the old feel of the pub. we had some family chats and i think i managed to inject some empathy into some of the poison with which the daily telegraph slurries the local area.
we walked back to granny’s and i asked her if she missed having an open fire. then i gave her a hug and we went home.














