Stepford Sugar

I didn’t realize I had to add this disclaimer but there were a little confusion with my nicknames for my POTS. I didn’t actually see Nicholas Sparks, that’s just my nickname for him. So last night, I found myself in at Playground 2.0 in Orange County waiting for NS to arrive. Turns out he was at the bar already waiting for me and from what I could tell, a few glasses of wine deep. I’m pretty sure he just came from golfing as he was wearing a polo and a fresh tan. However, he was extremely warm and quiet when I introduced myself.

I haven’t been out on a sugaring date with an older man for a while. I forgot how uncomfortable the stares and judgement were. So NS and I get started with the wine and ordering and things are pretty quiet between us. I kept trying to draw him out and while he was polite, I felt he was distant and not completely present. Our entire dinner stretched out this way, despite finishing two bottles of wine.

Towards the end, he seemed strange. He asked how I could keep drinking so much wine and that he felt weird. I tried being as comforting as possible, asking if there was anything I could do to cut the tension or have him feel more comfortable. He finally blurted out that he can’t be a sugar daddy. He felt too guilty and that he felt that his deceased wife would be disgusted with him for being with a woman who was less than half his age.

I tried to remain composed, explaining that I understand but that we wouldn’t be doing anything besides being platonic friends and there was no harm in that. At this point, I could tell he wouldn’t be able to budge. I asked him to finish the last glass of wine with me and that I wouldn’t continue to pressure him. He walks me to my car and hugs me, telling me he feels terrible for wasting my time and offers me an envelope with 4k in it.

Hi there! So I’m assuming you’re still in high school so I’ll do my best to give advice that doesn’t mess up your life, lol. I double majored in film and biological anthropology when I was in college. I recently graduated two months ago in June! (Woohoo!)

If you’re not familiar with my blog, over the years I struggled a lot with finding a career path. I started the blog when I was a sophmore in college which was 3-4 years ago. For those who have followed my blog, you’ll know that I’ve gone from wanting to be a doctor to a nurse and then to lawyer. I always believed that those were the only jobs that ended up making a lot of money and the only way I could “make it”.

When I was your age, I tried to focus on the tangibles - go to grad school, get a great job, make six figures, etc. And to an extent, that’s great because you’re focusing your goals. However, it forces you to adhere to a very rigid structure that doesn’t necessarily allow you the freedom to discover, exploit, and refine your talents. For example, I love being a makeup artist, learning new technology, and sweet-talking people. These were all secondary traits that I never thought would be applicable to finding a “real” job. They were just little quirks and hobbies I had, but I never thought to capitalize them.

Now I’m at a job I love that I never thought I would be doing. I got hired as an intern for the video production team of a huge software company. My experience with makeup and film major came in handy, but I don’t really use them at my job. I was exposed to a lot of technology as it was a software company that I didn’t know. I was able to take that software home and play with it until I got a full understanding of it all. When my boss saw that I was not an asset to his team, could quickly learn the technology our company was selling, and that people really loved talking to me... he only saw it natural to promote me to a full time position.

Now I travel all over to different companies (Google and Nike being my most recent clients) as a media liason. I schmooze our clients and develop our partnership. After travelling to many of these different companies, a few have hired me out and salary-match me.

The most important thing you need to take away from this is to be open to exploring your own talents and life path. Stop thinking in terms of “Oh, I need a six figure salary”. Just be the best at what you do so that there is no rival to you. Work your ass off. At anytime, I can be working between 60-100 hours (yes, I’m serious) a week but it’s what makes me great at my job. Getting six figures isn’t easy nor is it for everyone. You can spend your whole life working for it and not getting it. So focus on finding the most fulfilling life and career path that you can carve out for yourself. Whether or not you make six figures is irrelevant.

Hi everyone! If you’ve emailed me recently, Google has my account under review and has temporarily suspended it. I should know if I’ll be able to have it again by tomorrow but bear with me!

Yesterday, I was mindless venting to a coworker of mine about how I’ve been really struggling lately to lose weight. He told me he got HCG injections and went from 300lbs to a trim 110lbs in two years. He’s been able to keep the weight off for over a decade now and has highly recommended I try the injections + diet. If any of you have had experience with HCG injections and the diet, please let me know how it went for you and if you recommend specific places in Southern California I can get them done at. I will love you forever.

It’s really sad for me to talk about Charming, to be honest. He is someone that I not only really love and care for, but he was a huge part of my life for years. I honestly feel like he’s died and I’ve lost him. We haven’t talked since he told me that he got his then girlfriend (I don’t even know what to call her, since they were just casually dating) pregnant. I’ve tried emailing, calls, texts to no reply. I felt so heartbroken that I almost showed up to his work, but found out from his assistant that he’s taken an indefinite leave of absence.

So my date with Nicholas Sparks got pushed back to this week but I’m surprisingly optimistic. He has deleted his profile since arranging to meet with me and has already begun financial negotiations with me. I’m aiming for 3x a month with a 10-12k allowance. So far, he seems pretty game.

In other life news that is somewhat related to sugaring but not really, I got a ridiculous promotion at work. While I’m getting quite a good chunk of change, I will be making more than 6 figures by the end of this year. I’m so ridiculously excited and happy, seeing as I’m only 22 and things seem to be going so well for me. I absolutely adore my work, the people, and the companies I work for. Plus, this work has me travel a lot to do what I do best: schmoozing older men. My boss initially saw this at the conference we were working at together and he noticed all of the men that came through our studio gravitated towards me. I could make them feel comfortable and at ease before their interviews so he decided to capitalize on the opportunity.

And, I noticed a lot of this professional development made me extremely attractive in the sugaring and regular dating world. When men ask me what I do, they’re thoroughly impressed. I certainly didn’t think I was dumb before, but now I feel like I can go on a whole other level with the men I meet. I can demand more from the company I keep plus my network keeps expanding. I have all of these great opportunities to meet CEOs and millionaires. I’m better at talking to them and creating what they need.