all my peaches are ruined, bitch.

''i wasted those years'' who cares. you lived the only life you could've lived in those moments

*covered in blood* I'm literally fine guys. im still funny. Would you like to hear a joke Im going to tell you a joke

i'm bisexual because i'm attracted to both flesh and machinery

im bisexual because im attracted to both the divine and the mundane

women who are going nowhere in life i love you with all my heart

does anyone wnt to turn into a creature with me. it does have to be weird btw

Get hot water, not boiling hot but almost hotter than you can stand, and put a metal spoon in it for a few seconds. Take the spoon and put it against the mosquito bite for about 30 seconds. Do it a few times if you like. The proteins that cause the itching are susceptible to heat and break down.

WHY DON’T THEY TEACH THIS SHIT I have four decades of suffering from skeeter bites behind me

an underrated detail in pride and prejudice is that elizabeth bennett was home alone on the day darcy proposed because she had a headache. can you imagine. this was in the pre-painkillers era. you're at home with a headache and then this asshole walks into the room and tells you he loves you and wants to marry you even though he hates your whole family and you're beneath him. imagine having to deal with that while also having a headache. she doesn't even have ibuprofen