I have a McKirk prompt for you: So what if Jim does have a medical degree? We know Bones is always like 'Who's got the medical degree here' and Jim never says anything because he trusts Bones to take care of him. But then they're stuck down on a planet and Bones gets sick, nothing major but it needs treatmeant. And Jim starts talking in medical babble with the resident doctors because they don't know a thing about human anatomy? Please and thank you :)
Bones is incredibly smart, sure. But he can be an insufferable know-it-all when it comes to being a doctor. Of course, there is no doctor quite like Bones. Bones, who already was a renowned healer before even applying to Starfleet Academy. Bones, who knows everything about every alien species known in the universe, or at least has a database readily available in case he needs it. Bones, who is allowed to perform surgery on almost all of these species, too. Bones, who knows so much about xenobiology and anatomy that he sometimes forgets others don’t. Or, in Jim’s case, he forgets that Jim does know quite a bit, too. Because Jim graduated pre-med at Carver College in Iowa. He knows a lot about human diseases too, it’s just that Bones is always faster, and explains it either with such passion or such annoyance (depending on how dumb the sick person was), Jim always just let him. It’s kind of endearing, after all.
“Looks like chicken pox,” Jim says. He’s in med bay, together with Bones and a crew member who’s been brought in. “Yeah,” Bones says, “except everyone should be vaccinated against that. It’s the 23rd century, after all.” “I’m just saying, it looks like chicken pox,” Jim presses. Bones smiles, reaching out to gently cup Jim’s cheeks. “I think so too,” he says, “I’ll figure it out, I’m the one with the medical degree, after all.” He says, leaning in to press a quick kiss on Jim’s lips. Jim rolls his eyes when Bones pulls away. “You’re lucky you’re cute, because my smug is rubbing off on you,” he says, watching Bones interact with the patient. “Sweetheart, there was much more than your smug rubbing off on me this morning,” Bones replies casually.
Bones is with him on the bridge when they approach a Class M planet. Spock calls out that there is “Average intelligence” in life forms found down there, and then compares that to humans - earning a deathly stare from most of the crew members. They beam down when they arrive. Jim and Spock spend their time talking to the exotic alien race. Very human like, just more beautiful than average. Jim finds out they’re sick when he makes his round around town. And when he finds Leonard, the doctor is sniffing a little, too. “You okay?” Jim asks, gently squeezing Bones’ arm, and the doctor nods. “Yeah, I’m fine.” “You’re not getting a cold, are you?” “Please,” Bones huffs, “I haven’t been sick in years.”
That may have been true, but Bones gets sick anyway. Not a cold, but a full on flu. Just like the people on the planet. Bones refuses to stop working until he almost passes out and Jim has to catch him. “You need to go to the sick bay,” Jim says, and Bones huffs. “Yeah, I work there.” “No, you need to check yourself in,” Jim says firmly, sliding an arm around Bones’ waist. “No, I’m fine.” “In a pig’s eye you are,” Jim mocks, and Bones simply scoffs, too tired to argue the fact that Jim’s blatantly mocking him.
Bones remains sick for three full days and it doesn’t seem like he’s getting any better. The first two days, Jim could keep Bones occupied from work by tiring him out, or make him pass out from a particularly strong bourbon. But when the sickness progresses, Bones can’t even hold water, let alone alcohol. He’s not in the mood for sex, either. He tries to be, but he pretty much passes out before they can even get anywhere. “You need antibiotics,” Jim says, and for once, Bones isn’t arguing.
They make it back down to the planet, and Jim guides this shivering mess of a doctor towards the medical center. Bones is covered in blankets and still seems to be very cold, and so Jim just gets him a few more blankets and a cup of tea when Bones finally lies down on one of the beds. "We don’t know a lot about humans and how they respond to our medicine,“ the doctor there proclaims after taking a look at Bones.
Bones reaches out for the bottle of antibiotics, but Jim is ahead of him. He quickly scans through the ingredients, and shakes his head. “Bones can’t have amoxicillin,” he says, and Bones raises an eyebrow. “Lower the dose and use epinephrine if he starts showing symptoms of anaphylaxis, please.” Bones listens quietly to Jim talking medical to the local doctor, not saying anything until the doctor has left. “… what?” Bones just asks, and Jim smiles. “Pre-med graduate, nice to meet you,” he says, reaching out for Bones’ hand and he squeezes it softly, “you’re going to be okay.” “Yes, I know,” Bones replies, “you never told me you graduated pre-med.” “I’m not as good as you are,” Jim shrugs, and Bones huffs. “Naturally.” “Again, I’m the cocky one between the two of us,” Jim corrects him with a small smile. “You say that, but now it turns out you’ve got a medical degree, too,” Bones says, “perhaps we’re really turning into each other.” Jim lies down next to him, an arm around the other’s waist, and he kisses Bones’ cheek gently. “God, I hope not.”
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