jessefromholland

I volunteered my services to illustrate Bruce pretending to be gay to avoid the draft, so we have a version for each of the differing descriptions given by Bruce and Mike (quoted below) as well as a little comic panel squeezed onto the page and an impeccable photoshop job demonstrating Bruce as a tv show dancer, because the Shindig! bit is the funniest part.

Here is Bruce's description of events, sourced from here:

I went down to the draft board two weeks and two hours late. You were supposed to be there at seven. I got there at nine. Also, that weekend I went to a department store and bought some corduroy pants, blue Top-Sider deck shoes, and a nice button-down short sleeve shirt that I promptly shrunk in hot water. I put powder on my face and some perfume, and drove down for my interview. Since I was late, I was the only guy there, and they were starting to give me crap. They asked me all kinds of questions and eventually sent me up to the psychologist. He started interviewing me and was actually very cool. During the interview, he said “And ah, Bruce, what business would you like to be in?” and I replied “Well, I’d like to be a dancer on the Shindig! show.” The psychologist said “Okay. I don’t think we need you, but thank you for coming by. Follow the red line out.” [...]

And here's what Mike wrote in his autobiography:

[Bruce] too strongly opposed the war, though he took a more creative path to avoid service. He had a slender surfer's body, and he bought a pair of jeans, washed and dried them several times so they were extremely tight, and wore them when he went to his draft board for induction. He also borrowed a girlfriend's blouse, applied a touch of makeup, and found opportune times to bat his eyes and shake his hips.

Even if Bruce really did borrow a girlfriend's blouse I know we don't live in the blessed timeline where he went with pink + a bow, but how could I resist 🎀

And also for completion's sake, here is the full impeccably photoshopped image (link to og photo) with the circa-1970 pic I got his face from (because look at what he's wearing, I mean yeah obvsly):

And I may as well drop some (pre-Bruce) BB performances on Shindig! to wrap this up, featuring the dancers on some of the songs and more tight pants on all of the Boys: