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Take an L
As fate would have it - Chapter 21
Chapter 21 - How?
(Possible Manga spoilers up until Chapter 54)Â
Words: 2026
| Read on AO3 | Â , Â | < previous chapter |
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SASUSAKU FANFICTION: A LIFE WORTH LIVING
Title: A Life worth Living - Rating: K+ - Words: around 3k - Summary: How they spent the night after war at the hospital, only they will know. A night filled with pain, regrets and heartbreak but most of all love. / Post-war, pre-the last sasusaku fan fiction. - A/N: Ever wondered what happened after Naruto and Sasukeâs battle? When the war ended and their arms were treated? And what if some sasuke and sakura encounters happened at the hospital? After all, sheâs the top medic of Konoha. - Well, its just my imagination. I hope you like it. ~have a nice day! - - - A LIFE WORTH LIVING - - - Black crows having blood-red sharingans in the orbits of their skulls, flew haphazardly screaming hurtful voices. The red sky and the deathly atmosphere, made his heart to beat faster and faster with every passing second. He ran and ran, trying to escape from his detriment past.
He was the same helpless, poor boy who had lost his family due to a reason he was unconcerned of, again.
He ran desparately from that fear, trying to not re-live the tragedy that once turned him into something he was not.
Something he had never wanted to be.
He was a killer, a murderer and an assassin who had killed so many innocent people, he had no right to kill or to even scratch. He could see the rubicund skin of his hands, his blood stained hands. The blood he had shed, could not be washed away. It would stay there forever. On his hands, on his face, in his heart. He was no longer the happy, little boy he once used to be.
And it was all because of that night.
All because of the tragedy he was going through once again.
And a failed past which he was now reliving.
No matter how or where he tried to escape, his tragic past never stopped haunting him. Never stopped chasing him.
Stopping only to catch his unstable breath, he fell on his knees. His eyes were closed shut, afraid to catch sight of anything horrible. The caws of the dark birds made him shutter open his eyes and he saw something he prayed he wouldnât have.
Standing in between the crows was a dark figure. Eyes, as red as blood.
His heart was filled with fear again after getting the sight of his beloved brother, Uchiha Itachi.
The way the tomoes rotated in his eyes, activating the mangekyou, the more his heartbeat increased.
âFoolish, little brother.â
âI-Itachi⌠why!?â He didnât notice when tears escaped his dark eyes.
In an instant, he could see the said figure turning into crows-disappearing, leaving a âgoodbyeâ among the caws of those animals.
âKill your bestfriend.â
âKill⌠my⌠bestfriend?â he sobbed. âYes, kill my bestfriend.â
He stood up, turning into the seventeen year old man he was, having the same bloody eyes.
kill your bestfriend.
He started to run, this time, without fear.
kill your bestfriend.
In a short while, he could see kusanagi stained in blood. Blood, all over his being. Yes, he had killed his bestfriend. Pools of blood were formed on the ground and a certain blood-covered blonde was floating on it.
He looked over at his blood stained hands and emotions hit him at the very moment.
what had he done? he couldnât understand. Not until he saw her.
A teary eyed and broken hearted, pink haired kunoichi, dressed in her chunin uniform was right infront of him.
âThis isnât you, Sasuke!â She screamed, holding back them tears.
His heart ached at the sight but his consumed heart decided to commit the most unimaginable crime and without a second thought, he pierced her chest with lightening.
Her heart stopped beating. He had killed her. He had killed everyone he loved. But the words that escaped her blood stained lips, brought him back to his older self.
âAre you happy now, Sasuke-kun?â She managed to smile before collapsing.
He had killed the one person who had loved him more than herself. The one who filled his unworthy, lonely existence. The only feeling he could have at the moment was,
Regret.
- - -
He opened his eyes, breathing heavily.
He felt pain in the left side of his body but the pain in his heart was something far more greater than that. He couldnât understand what was going on until he took a notice of his surroundings. The window of the room showed the world outside. The sky was not red, but was beautifully decorated with sparkling stars. The atmosphere was calm and there were no violent screams.
No blood and no pain.
He took a look at the room he was in. The moon light coming from the window was the only source of light. Different machines were placed on his left side, a machine showing his unworthy heartbeat and another medical equipment showing the status of his impure blood.
He couldnât feel his left arm and knew it was due to the final clash. He sighed in relief knowing his bestfriend was safe and sound.
He aimed to sit on the hospital bed, but trying to do so, he felt a grip on his lone hand. Looking at his right, he saw the pinkette holding his hand and leaning her head on his bed, sleeping peacefully.
The look on her face made his heart fill in pleasure. Her beautiful pink locks decorated her calm features and her cheeks were flushed, may be due to the cold.
He smiled at the scene and the small smile on her rosy lips made his being warm. He could never imagine to lose her again, now that she was right by his side. To know she was well, made him satisfied. After all he had done, this was all he could ever demand for.
A cold breeze from the window, made her shiver and she opened her eyes, slowly. The way her eyelids lifted and the way her emeralds were now staring right into his obsidian ones, he couldnât help but feel loved.
Loved, by the girl he had caused the most pain to.
The mere thought of his previous actions caused his shattered heart to pain even more. He remembered how he tried to kill her when she came to his rescue, to save him from the darkness he was stuck in. Or how he showed her her own death when she begged him to stop, to stop fading away.
Seeing the concerned look in her sparkling eyes, he felt guilty.
Guilty, for what he had made her go through. After all he had done to her, she still cared for him.
Annoying.
But at the same time, he felt longing. Longing to see those love-filled green eyes. And it was then he realized how he had missed her eyes. How he had missed her.
âSasuke-kun? do you need something?â she asked,almost awake.
He nodded his head, no.
She kept on looking into his deep, black eyes. How she missed those eyes of him. His expressionless, stoic,beautiful eyes. The eyes she had fallen so hard for. The eyes she had loved all her life. But there was one thing more about those eyes now, they had caused her terror. They had caused her pain, but being the brave woman she was, she was not afraid of the owner of her broken heart.
She felt warmth on her hand and when she looked down, breaking the eye contact, she saw the only Uchiha holding her hand tightly, as if he was afraid of letting her go.
But little did he know, she was all his. And that, she was not going to run away, not when she finally had him.
Now that the promise was finally fulfilled, she felt her heart warming up and she was more than thankful to her best friend, resting in the next room.
Noticing the situation, a blush appeared on the holder of the darkest eyes and he looked away, losing the grip on her hand. But thanks to the darkness that crept inside the room, she didnât see it.
âI woke you up.â he said.
âThats okay, I was going to wake up any way.â She told him, moving her hand away from his. âSo, are you feeling alright?â she managed to smile, hiding the blush on her face.
âHn. fine.â
Even though he was not talking much, she was comfortable. He was never the talkative one any way. She nodded at his reply and as much as she wanted to stay, she thought giving him some personal time would be a good idea. She stood up from the stool, she was previously sitting on, aiming to leave.
âUm.. I should be taking my leave now, Sasuke-kun you should sleep.â She said, turning around.
âSakura.â he called her, causing to stop her in her tracks.
âYes?â she said, facing him again.
âPlease, stay.â
The sincerety and gratitude in his voice shocked her a little. He had never talked to her like that before. Not only her, she had never heard him talking like that to anyone. Feeling a little special, she walked towards his bed.
âDo you need something?â She asked, sincerely.
Realizing how clueless she was, he turned his face to the window on his left.
âTch. Annoying.â he whispered.
But she heard it correctly. And now that she knew the meaning behind this, she didnât mind. Smiling, she sat on her previous place, looking closely at a pouting Sasuke.
She smiled at a cute looking Sasuke and accidently, said her thoughts aloud.
âYou look cute, you know.â
Though she said it in a low voice, he heard her. And smirking, he turned his head to face her. She blushed furiously under his gaze and broke the eye contact that was once again being made.
âHn.â he smiled softly but she failed to see it.
Looking at her flushed face, he remembered the young Sakura who used to blush like that everytime he was near her. At first, it was annoying but then, he loved that annoying side of her.
Looking at her now, he felt proud of how she had changed. She was now a strong kunoichi and a skilled medic. No one could match her strength as well as her abilities. He didnât notice when she noticed him smiling and smiled back.
He was wrong. She was still the same Sakura who loved him with all her heart. And he was happy to know that.
âI missed you.â he heard her saying.
He felt tears forming in his eyes at the little confession and to avoid looking like a weak person, he turned his head away and closed his eyes.
âI did, too.â
She was not expecting a reply from him but the answer she received, made her feel like the luckiest person alive. A tear fell from her left eye but she wiped it away. Knowing that he wanted to talk, all she wanted was to satisfy him. She knew he was hurt and that she couldnât take his pain away, all she wanted was to make him happy.
You bet she was willing to do so.
âUm.. so how was life outside Konoha?â She managed to break the silence and gain his attention.
All she wanted to do was to keep up any sort of conversation. Anything that could make him feel better. But being away from him for more than a little time, all she could do was keep up awkward conversations.
âIt was fine.â
He said, not knowing what else to say. He was ashamed of his past and leaving Konoha. He was ashamed of leaving her when she told him she needed him. Even if he tried to, he couldnât fill the hole. All he could do was to not hurt her anymore.
âAnd.. what did you usually do.. I mean after.. you left?â
She could not think of anything else to talk about. Carefully, she asked him about his past. A part of his past, she thought wouldnât hurt him. But little did she know, leaving her alone was one of the mistakes he knew he had made.
âI.. I went to Orochimaru and trained with him, everyday. He taught me many jutsu, mostly those related to snakes.â
âwell what do you expect, he is a creepy snake.â Sakura commented.
Sasuke chukled for the first time-at the statement- after that incident. Seeing him almost laughing, made her heart skip a beat. She fell for him, once again.
âI was too fixated on my goal,â he continued. âI learned everything he taught me, and once I was done learning everything, it was time for me to go after Itachi.â
His heart broke at the name of his beloved brother, but he continued, trying to not hurt the kunoichi and fulfill her expectations.
âKnowing Orochimaru, I knew he wouldnât let me go for the sake of my body, so I killed him, taking advantage of the weak state he was in. Then I gathered a team and started persuing Itachi and when I found him, we fought and he died.â
She could see the saddened expression on his face and thought it was enough for him.
âBut that creep Orochimaru is still alive, Sasuke-kun!â
âHe couldnât just die, could he?â
She chukled this time and felt happy for the more than enough answers he was giving her. A part of her bloomed and she continued the conversation.
âBut when Tsunade-sama told us about his death, she herself was surprised. Guess she knew it will happen.â
Sasuke smiled at her and she felt warm. She had never seen him smiling, ever before.
âTell me your story.â He said.
âUm.. well, after you left.â She regretted saying that but continued any way. âI made a promise to myself to become independent and not to depend solely on Naruto for bringing you back.â Another piece of her heart broke at the statement.
His chest hurt when he heard that. He once again felt guilty and all he wanted was to take away the pain he had caused her.
âI trained with Tsunade-sama. Learned medical ninjutsu and she taught me the byakugou..â She raised a fingure, pointing at the diamond on her forehead.
He felt happy for what she had achieved while he was away. But he also felt unhappy for not being able to watch her achieve all that.
âI saved chakra in my forehead and unleashed it during the war, you know the rest. Life was pretty much the same until Naruto returned and we started going on missions. Sai and Captain Yamato became a part of our team too. At first, me and Naruto hated Sai but then we accepted him. Missions were fun too.â
Sasuke felt bad for missing all the good time he couldâve had. An unfamiliar desolated, melancholy expression appeared on his face and Sakura noticed that.
âI fought Sasori of Akatsuki during our mission of Gaaraâs retrival. He was always screaming âArt is eternalâ, 'Art is eternalâ â she chukled. âBut he was strong nontheless.â
Quickly she changed the topic and tried hard to change his current condition which she actually did. Sasuke sat up on the bed, ready for a conversation for the first time in forever.
âYou wonât believe I fought a member of Akatsuki. He was babbling about 'art is an explosionâ â
âI know! the clay guy!â
âHn.â
âI came to face him too but Naruto and kakashi-sensei handled him mostly.â
âHe commited suicide trying to kill me..â he smirked weakly at the stupidity.
âwhat!? were you hurt!?â She said a little too loud, standing up from the stool at once.
Sasuke stared at the stupid girl in front of his eyes. How could she be so kind to him? How could she be so innocent? How could she still care after all he had put her through? After all the times he made her cry. Guiltridden, he replied with a simple 'hnâ turning his face away from her.
Realizing her reaction, which came out of nowhere, she forced a smile before settling down once more.
âUm.. soâŚtell me about your team mates!â she said, cheered up again.
The question caught him off-guard but he replied any way.
He stared at her for a while before finally speaking.
âSuigetsu. He was one of the seven ninja swordsmen.â Looking the interested look on her face, he continued. âHe was like Naruto. Alaways fighting with me and saying 'you are not the boss Sasukeâ , A good companion nevertheless.â
Her face brightened up due to a more than satisfactory answer from Uchiha Sasuke. And Sasuke could see her glowing expressions even in the dark of night. A small, alomost invisible smile appeared on his lips and he proceeded forward.
âKarin. She was an Uzumaki. She was not too good of a medic but using her abilities, she could heal two people a day. She helped me at times too.â
Sakura felt a sign of jealousy in her heart at the thought of another woman near Sasuke. But knowing the said woman, due to their previous encounter, she supressed the feeling.
âJugo. He was entirely dedicated. A test subject for Orochimaruâs curse seal.â
At the mentioning of the curse seal, her heart pained. She could see flashbacks of the time when her beloved was cursed because of the seal. It was the curse mark that changed their lives. The painful state he was in, broke her heart and tears formed in her eyes. But being Haruno Sakura, she decided to speak.
âCaptain Yamato. He is strict as compared to Kakashi-sensei but generous too. He would always treat us while on night stays during missions. He would always scare the hell out of Naruto.â
She smiled replaying the memories they shared with their senpai.
âHe was strong, woodstyle user. He always protected us.â
Sasuke noticed the serene expression of her face which took away the pain of being away from them. Knowing there was someone to protect the two precious people to him, he felt pleasure.
âAnd Sai. He is rude at times. Too outspoken. He looks like you but he isnât like you at all.â
He was reminded of the intruder he once encountered. Being reminded of the incident when he tried to sever all his bonds, when he tried to kill them. He felt as if someone was squeezing his damaged heart.
âAt first, he would give us that creepy fake smile of his and piss us off in every way anyone could.â she sighed, remembering the time he called her ugly. â'He was sent to spy on Naruto from Danzo.â
He felt pride knowing he had killed the bastard with his own two hands, who was he supposed to mess with his bestfriend? But just the thought of the dreadful incident made his heart beat faster. How in the world he tried to kill both of them. How did he try to kill her.
He was so lost.
â'But he changed and learned about friendship and now we share a bond.â she smiled, lost in her own thoughts, unable to see what the Uchiha was feeling.
Every time he thought of that incident and how he tried to take her life away, a piece of his existence hurt. He couldnât image what could have been done if Kakashi had not come. He couldâve killed her and he couldâve destroyed the one person who loved him, who cared for him.
A tear formed in his left eye and in order to stop it from flowing he closed his eye. It was as if a sharp blade was cutting his throat over and over again.
The pain was unbearable and he knew there was nothing he could do to pay for his sins. There was nothing he could do to mend what was broken.
âSakura⌠Iâm sorry.â the words escaped his lips without him ever realizing.
She looked at him with wide eyes. The tears she had tried to hold back, fell from her eyes to her cheeks and to his hand, she was now holding.
âSasuke..-kun.â
She didnât give it a second thought and stood up from her place, wrapping her arms around his neck. Her tears were soaked in his shirt and it felt as if his broken pieces were being mended. He breathed her scent and rested his head on her shoulder.
âItâs okay.. itâs .. okay!â she said between sobs.
A tear fell from his eye and he didnât hold back this time.
It was just like the time when he woke up from the trauma with the help of the slug princess. The only difference was his arm wrapped around her waist protectively.
Never again. Never again was he going to hurt her. Never again was he going to cause her pain. Never again was he going to leave her alone.
The way he caressed her back and the way she held him closer, exchanged all the unsaid and unspoken promises between them. He knew he still had reasons to live and he was still impostant to someone. His life was not completely unworthy and he was grateful to the girl in his arms.
âThank you, Sakura.â
He whispered in her ear and she smiled knowing the meaning behind those sacred words. - - - THE END
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