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She was the still point of the turning world. I had read this in a book somewhere, sometime. 

When I did, I couldn’t quite get what he meant by it. I didn’t understand how a person could stop your breathing, inhabit all your thoughts, be the pause of a constant moving life. Love had never struck me before. Obsession had never confined me before. I was grateful enough to have never felt so ardently about someone. Never to have felt a feeling of passionate and genuine love. It may appear as a sad thing to you but rest assured, I am not the least bit saddened by it. 

For all my twenty years and the unknown amount of remaining years to follow, I was more than positive I would never have to go through the false concept of love. I knew I was never to be married, never to have children, never to give love to anyone, love that I, myself, didn’t even have. It wasn’t sad to me, it was relieving. I could never put so much emotional energy into one person. Not only do I not have that, but the idea itself is absurd. 

Love always comes at a cost. You devote yourself to one person only to get two possible outcomes. Either they break your heart and leave, or you break theirs, it is inevitable in every love story. I find that heartbreak is more common in relationships than love itself. Betrayal and spite followed shortly after. Why would someone voluntarily want to go through that? I regularly take risks in my life, but I would never set myself up for this idea of love that only breaks a man apart. 

Though recently, everything started to change. She was the still point of the turning world, of my horrible turning world. 

She stood there like an angel, no she was an angel. When I saw her for the first time, I knew she was it. I’ve never seen a girl with beauty like hers. I’ve never thought of anyone with that beauty that she encompasses. Hell, I never thought of anyone to be beautiful before her. No one compared, no one could ever compare to this angelic woman. 

She held a glow to her of both love and life. You could tell that she was meant to be something. You could tell that she was meant to be somebody to everybody. She was a rare kind of person, making her even more special in my eyes. 

Purity and innocence radiated off of her like her own personal halo. I knew it would be best for me to stay away for her sake, but my selfish desires will not let me. I didn’t want to tarnish her white feathers or whatever positive outlook she had left of humanity. I didn’t want my black to color her white. 

This angel was the kind of girl who deserved a guy that can give her pure love, not tainted love, if I could even give her any love.