playing human

cal was doing his best to butter her up, and charlie bought every single bit of it. she had to. her brain was too fractured, too hungry for any scrap of attention to notice the guy was just in survival mode. charlie wasn't a psychopath. she really didn't want to hurt him! companionship was what she was seeking. blame all the books she read and romantic movies she watched on repeat. she hoped that with time, he'd grow to cherish this new life. he had to love her. he had to. she was all smiles, but her eyes kept darting down to the zip ties keeping his limbs in place. she hated they were there, but she was afraid he'd run the second he had the chance to. ignoring her worries, she closed the distance, her chest hurting with how much she wanted this to be real. carefully she took a seat on his lap. not fully, though, as she rested her weight on a single leg, leaving the other one free. she just wanted to be close to him. "i trust i won't have to wait long for that to happen. after all, you did like me back then, didn't you?" it ought to make getting used to this easier. she drawled her words, had hand shaking as it landed on his cheek. she was so desperate for contact it nearly made her sick. "are you hungry?"

she was a wild card, and he had never been good at having a plan for any feasible variable. he could only attempt to adjust in the moment. attempting to bring to the surface of his brain anything, everything, that charlie had ever said to him, he reached for any nugget of knowledge that might be able to help him. observing every minute expression that crossed her face, his breath hitched when the woman sprawled across one of his bound legs. his brain was further scrambled, as her skin was so warm. her words, too, were not cutting. they were a juxtaposition to her actions. licking at his lips, he nodded his head, the one piece of his body that remained free. "i did like you," he assured, then vehemently insisted, "i do like you." the present tense had to be a distinction, he figured. tilting into her touch, he nuzzled his cheek into her palm. offering her the contact that she so desperately seemed to need. "i am hungry. would you please feed me?" permission. that was something he obviously needed to seek until she found a way to trust him.

cerulean  hues  studied  the  letters  curled  across  the  paper  in  neat  handwriting.  her  instructions  were  loud  and  clear.  lucy  was  running  out  of  time  and  desperate  to  find  that  one  crucial  piece  of  information  she  could  latch  onto.  something that  would  make  all  else  fall  into  place.  the brunette  took  in  a  deep  breath  as  she  crumpled  the  pages,  the  edge  held  close  to  the  burning  flame  of  the  candle  on  her  desk.  but  the  door  to  her  chambers  opened  before the  evidence  could  turn  to  ashes.  with  deft  movement  of  her  fingers,  the  pages  were  tucked  underneath  the  waistband  of  her  skirt  before  she  turned  to  face  her  visitor.    “  has  no  one  taught  you  manners?  ”    she  breathed  out  in  relief  when  she  recognized  their  familiar  features,  hint  of  a  smile  appearing.

dark eyes could not help their curiosity. her mother had tutted at her throughout her childhood that her want to know would be the death of her. it did not help that she was kept out of important discussions, though she firmly believed that she had plenty of value to contribute. rulan had more than once come upon a congregation of her family and the council and the ongoing conversation would extinguish. thus she knew what it looked like when someone was caught trying to hide something. the guilt was etched onto lucy's expression, but rulan didn't want to believe it. she wanted to trust this woman, the one who had been her confidant for months. "mother raised me as a proper lady. i did not mean to disturb you. i..." her face pinched, holding back what she had just overheard. "i am sorry. i can go."

"i don't think i've ever been wrong." theo shakes his head. they both know he'd argue this point til he's blue in the face. theo's abel's biggest fan too. when he can he goes to his shows and finds the other backstage and can't help but feel like it's where he's supposed to be. theo knows that there's a difference between them but in his eyes he just can't allow the other to big up theo while putting himself down. if it was anyone else he'd take it all in stride and agree wholeheartedly. but this is abel and he's theo's. "don't ever fade away to me. don't talk shit about my friend like that." theo scolds him. he has no idea what a law of average is but what he does know is how to let his finger tips brush across the other's belly beneath his shirt. "where do you fall in to all that then abel?"

they were both wounded animals, and neither of them seemed to know it. "right, right, you are...what's that word for all-knowing?" he could not remember the word omniscient. the word did not matter, ultimately, as abel looked to the side, onto the sticky floor of the bar so that he did not have to meet theo's gaze. the earnest behavior coming suddenly from theo left him off-kilter, shaking his head. "sorry.." abel didn't ever want to disappear from theo's life, but he also did not want to take back the disparaging comments towards himself. he lifted his gaze, not pushing theo's touch away, goosebumps rising on his stomach, dancing along the definition of his abs. "you don't need me to tell you that you're hot, theo. everyone in this bar knows that. you could go home with anyone. no matter who you choose, i'll be going to the same place regardless."

minjae crowds into his space just the way he likes and he nods as his hands find their home on the younger mans waist. "yes, that's much better. you smell like the bar." elijah hums as he noses into the other's hair. this will always be worth it. having him here in his grasp. he cannot help the fond eyeroll at the others brand of humour. "don't tease me with such good news." elijah murmurs, "your father has always been a thorn. imagine if it were this pretty face instead? i wouldn't be nearly so upset." he drops a kiss to minjae's hairline before lifting his hands to the other mans jaw to pull him back. to inspect his face. "corporate life is so fun, isn't it?" he asks softly as he presses their mouths together. "let's shower them off of you. i don't like it."

now, here they were. "you know i don't like to drink much." not in public, anyway. he had only ever relinquished control to the older man. "but then there was line after line of shots." so he had ducked out as soon as socially acceptable, blaming his lack of inhibitions to the fact that his old friend had been performing at the establishment. he hadn't seen abel since in years. on purpose. minjae had always been horrendous at maintaining relationships, and even now, with a ring on his finger, he held his breath that elijah still might decide he was not worth the effort. "you long for the day where we're both rulers?" minjae did not. he dreaded the day with every fiber of his being. letting the kiss between them linger, he huffed out a humorous laugh. "corporate life isn't nearly as thrilling, i suppose, as criminal life," the admission came with his grabbing onto one of elijah's hands, tugging him toward the bathroom.

her gaze follows him closely as he steps away from her, steps towards the altar. her head tilts as he speaks and her expression is filled with thoughtfulness as she attempts to navigate her own mind, her own desires, in order to know what to do next. she'd been attracted to him for a while now, had touched herself to the thought of him, to the idea of giving into temptation with the one man who'd managed to spark her interest. the fact he was someone she shouldn't or couldn't touch seemed to only make the hunger all the more potent. she licks at her lips, before opting to approach him. she takes gentle, slow steps, enough to be mere breaths apart from jakob. "what if i want you to stain me?" she questions through a whisper, the words falling innocently even if they were anything but. "what if i don't want anyone else to touch me. just you?" she, hesitantly, reaches for his wrist, emerald hues focusing on his digits, "i don't care about going to hell, father..." she admits then, as her index finger strokes sweetly along the lines on the palm of his hand. "i feel as though i am in hell already. i ache. right here..." her free hand shifts, directing his attention between her thighs. "goodness, it feels as though something is missing. from inside of me." she all but whines, as she guides his hand to rest against her chest. "does that make sense? i feel...empty. i want to feel full. i think...you could make me feel that way. only you..."

the gap was closed by the bold younger woman, and that next touch threatened to unravel years of discipline and devotion. the intimacy of the simple motion caused his stomach to clench, that flame to ignite and spread like wildfire before he could extinguish it. gaze trailing downwards, enraptured by leonie, his body betrayed him, responding to her proximity and words with a primal need that matched her own. his fingers curled against her chest, his thumb brushing the underside of her breast. he could feel himself hardening beneath his cassock, a physical manifestation of the spiritual battle raging within him. one that he was losing. "you are condemning yourself to damnation, leonie. salvation." and yet. large fingers separate, palming the mound beneath his touch. "it should be god and his presence that brings you completion. not me. but," his voice was thick with surrender, "it is my job to serve. to offer you salvation." his free hand slipped to skate up her leg, from her knee to the inside of her milky thigh. "bare your soul to me before the lord, leonie. if you are plagued with this burden, let me alleviate the weight."

truth be told, a lot of his childhood was hard to recall. made only harder by his refusal to return to his hometown. all he knows, is that the more he thinks about it, the harder his head hurts. the more his fingertips shake. he searches abel's expression generally, finds himself comfortable within the other comedian's presence. finds solace in his non-judgmental nature. it wasn't something he was used to, honestly. most people in his life had taken to scoffing or eye-rolling him away, but not abel. "well, uh..." he laughs, though it lacks any real humour, which is a rare sight where richie tozier was concerned. "you like...ever have a nightmare and you barely remember it when you wake up? but like, you know it fucked you up?" he questions, casually, not wanting to overwhelm anyone - least of all someone he feels this safe with. "that's like...how my whole childhood feels whenever i think about it. like, i know i love my folks. they're great. but like...the idea of going back home..." cue the genuine shudder, that rushes uncomfortably right through him. "does that sound fucking crazy?"

with an open ear and mind, abel waited until richie got his bearings and could think of where he even wanted to begin. tilting his head, he notated that he and richie seemed to have more in common than just their profession. the hollow laughter, the dismissive way that he was approaching what was clearly trauma. "it doesn't sound crazy," he assured lowly, jaw locking and tapping his fingers together in consideration. what it sounded like to him was that something was haunting richie, that there were ghosts that visited him. "there's some kind of mental block there. whatever holds you back from going back home...it's a form of self-defense." abel could recall his childhood with clarity, but his had been a happy one. the trauma had come later during a singular, isolated event when he had been in college. "does it bother you, though? that there is that block there? not gonna try and be a fuckin' therapist. just wondering. i know what it's like to use comedy to process all the bullshit."

« i can still land the deal, » she assures him, a hand shooting up to wipe at her cheeks. she has always been wired this way — to put business before safety, success before comfort. she intends to expand noeul's kingdom until there's not a single crook or crevice that doesn't belong to him. she wants it for him, with him. somewhere in the back of her mind she is aware that this proximity will only harm her, but she is already aching. and for him it's worth it a million times over. « but not with them. i want them dead. »

his hand greeted the one that came to her right cheek. "they'll die," he assured vehemently. "any hand that dared to touch you...i will take more than that offending arm. they'll die," her request would be acquiesced. "next time, you will not go alone. if you will not go with fox, then you shall go with me," the instance was paired with the press of a wet washcloth tending to a different open wound. "any one that has touched you...will you name or describe. they will not remain standing by the next meeting."

she liked the way her name sounded when leaving his mouth, could only imagine how much she'd enjoy it if he moaned it instead. the redhead was no fool. she knew she was playing with fire, but she'd always preferred heat over ice. her gaze searches his own, attempts to locate that hint of uncertainty. that hint of desire that she can latch onto. she didn't care about hell. she'd much rather relish heaven on earth and pay the price for it later, than she would be a good girl on earth and learn that heaven was as bland as she suspected it was. "if we are sinners for our thoughts, what prevents us from acting on them, father?" she questions then, earnestly so, as her fingers trace along his hand. "i don't know what happens. what if it's worth the risk?" she counters, biting purposefully into her bottom lip. "if thoughts aren't actions...then just tell me. if you could...what would you do to me?"

jakob had taken a vow of chastity. he had been in his late twenties at the time, so it was not as if he was completely unfamiliar of what it meant to be with, inside, of another person. so many years, however, had transpired since then, as he was a man who did not stray away from his commitments. not until leonie had stumbled into his path. he had not once looked at her with want until she had become a woman of age, but once she welcomed her twenties? he had not been able to move his gaze from her whenever she was around. "we are allowed our sinful thoughts. we are allowed to want the apple that hangs from the vine..." his biblical allusions remained firm. "but we are meant to reject that want. that desire is a test." one that he was failing. leonie was not his eve. she was his lilith. still, he did not push away her hand, fingertips dancing along the knuckles. "if i could..." he should not indulge the younger woman, and yet he proclaimed, "if it wouldn't condemn you to hell," as he cared not about his own fate, "i'd claim you right now. at the altar, in front of god and all of the saints. i'd stain you." he swallowed, stepping back and moving closer to the altar. "if you aim to...sin before marriage, it should not be with me." his face pinched with agony. "the consequences...i shall not condemn you to hell."

« don't do that, » she begs quietly, gaze lifting from the spot on the counter she's been scrubbing for the last five minutes. nat looks at him and her resolve falters, softening the moment their eyes meet. she's desperate to have him, even as a friend — even if that means living with the painful reminder that he doesn't want her. she'd rather take that than tiptoeing in large circles around him, though for all her bravado she's not entirely sure she'd survive seeing him with anyone else. « don't be sweet to me, fox. it just confuses me. » there's a silent plea in her eyes, a cry for mercy. « i — i don't understand, i thought we — » she stops herself before she ventures too far into territory he's long since moved on from. it will only make her look like the fool she so surely is.

"i need to remain as i've always been. the sword, the shield. i will not let you be caught in the crossfire."

"do i look like i'm joking?" she questions then; voice soft, expression laced in innocence. she had felt this way for him for a little while now. since moving to the area, her parents had found solace within the church there. meanwhile, she'd found solace in him. or, more specifically, thinking about him. "oh, i'm not looking for forgiveness, father." she admits then, clinging onto the feigned shame that clearly hasn't prevented her from going for what she wants. "if it's a sin then...why does it feel so good to think about? that doesn't make any sense, does it?"

leonie looked like temptation personified. like everything jakob did not realize that he could have ever wanted. that want gnaws at his stomach, swallowing his inhibitions the more that he spent time with her alone. her admission stole the breath from his lungs, eyes widening in shock, oceanic swirls of turmoil as she rocked his very foundation. waves of desire greeted the pit of his stomach, and he swallowed thickly, adam's apple bobbing. understanding why it was that adam had bit into that apple. "thoughts are not actions," he grit through, "we are all sinners, leonie." the sound of her name was a melody as it rhythmically rolled through his mouth like a hymn. "the devil whispers in each of our ears." his included. "what you are desiring is a forbidden fruit. you, and i, know what happens if you bite into it."

eyes roll playfully, though genuine amusement finds his expression. abel was a funny guy, a comedian that richie happened to respect - which spoke volumes, really. "alright, then what are we asking? 'cause i could go into detail if you wanted me to, but i don't even think you'd believe me." cue the dramatic pause; he too could have a theatrical flair, when useful. "fuck, i don't even believe myself. think i must've just had an overactive imagination as a child and...went with it."

abel let richie speak his piece before saying anything. "so you think you are dealing with false memories?" at the heart of him, abel was proposing a rhetorical question. he would believe the younger man no matter what he proclaimed, but he was also kind enough to give him an out. "i would believe you, if you feel the memories to be true. i know i'm just an audience of one, but i will listen to you all the same." leaning closer, he did not state that he had a background that, too, seemed like something out of the movies. he didn't want to make this moment about him. wanting to learn more about richie, if he was willing. already believing that the other's tale may be all the more outrageous from his description. "i am asking about your childhood. i know that's not a specific answer, but i want you to begin wherever you feel comfortable. what do you recall, rather imagined or real?" he leaned toward the truth being the latter. "what stands out to you?"

Like he needs him close enough to smell him. Wonder where he's been. Elijah's gaze is half lidded. Curious and knowing at the same time. He wonders if the other man will lie.

he closed the distance between them without hesitation all the same, dropping his head on elijah's shoulder and angling his head to tickle his lips against the vein on the other's neck. "am i close enough for you?" he had stripped himself bare for elijah long ago, after all. letting him see, letting him know, of the scars that littered his body and mind. that did not mean, however, that he was so naive that he did not acknowledge that there would likely always be secrets between them. "i was at a meeting. my father decided to retire and now i'm head of elixir," his words first were sardonic, so very clearly a jest, hands finding elijah's waist. "i was at a bar," the truth. "i was invited to go there after work." he offered nothing more than that. elijah knew he worked at an investment firm during the day.

"oh he doesn't know how to eat pussy? what a shame. you really don't know how to pick replacements for me baby." link can't even begin to force the smirk off of his mouth. mikha's always on his mind even when he can't see her. when he's fucking into someone else her face flashes in his mind like a siren call. and here they are not touching each other like they're trying to prove they're good people. or something. link's going to get in her pants tonight he's already decided. "maybe you need to ride his face. you're always good at taking what you want. sometimes little pussy's like that need a woman to tell them what to do." link shrugs. he looks down at her and feels his dick getting hard. yeah he's easy for her. "oh c'mon. you know i tell everyone they got a real pretty pussy but you know i mean it most about yours." link tells her softly as he tips his head down. mouth pressed to her ear. "because you've seen all my videos. you know exactly the shit i say. you're special baby."

"i don't pick them for their skills. you know that. all that matters it that their wallets are heavy. they're business. you're pleasure." more than she should admit, likely. the words would only further inflate link's ego, but it's not that she ever sought money from him. their relationship was not a financial transaction, a rarity in mikha's life. "they're aren't replacements. they're clients. just like you have screen partners, right?" not quite the same nor the same industry by any real measure. "you say that like it's so easy. you're right. i take what i want. it's not like i turn into a docile warm hole for them. but i also know how fragile most men are. stroking their egos reaps better rewards for me." even if she had to fake orgasms. she never stayed the night, and would tend to herself after, the image of link flashing behind her eyelids. shivers bumped along her arms. "i know you're a sweet talker," that was as much as she was willing to admit as want swelled between her thighs. "with or without a script." she reached up, stroking the outline of his chin. "and i know you want me right now, right?" with him, she did not have to hide, pushing their bodies flush together and free hand sneaking between them to cup his cock. her other hand moved from his chin to the nape of his neck, fingertips playing with his curls. "take me while he's occupied, then. if you have big enough balls to do so." taunting, her mouth curved upwards, lips glistening with a coral gloss.

levi has to look away from brice in the backseat of the cab. he can never resist him. and he doesn't want to. ever since he had been sat across from brice in that board room he knew the universe couldn't have conjured up anything else for him. brice is all he wants. levi does not feel guilty about it. he doesn't care about what brice does when he cannot see him. at least he tells himself that. there's no need to ask for more he knows the answer. he's still going to fuck him. and he will touch him wherever he wants. no one cares about them here in this city. he follows easily as brice pulls him along. he likes when he does this too, tugs levi along because he knows it's what the blonde wants. brice always indulges in what he wants. he follows after him without much thoughts in his head. he just wants him. it's all he's been thinking about since he last saw him. where levi had told him he doesn't care if it's hard and he doesn't care if the other has to lie. levi is going to have him in all the ways he can and pretend not to care about the ways he can't. they're finally alone. he couldn't wait to be alone with brice. his fingers aren't gentle as he tugs at the collar of his shirt, clumsily gets his own shoes off before he's shoving the other into the wall. levi's not gentle. "i want you. i missed your face." he tells him. wet slips sliding down to his jaw. he reaches a hand down to grab at brice's to bring it to the chain on his neck. it's new. "tell me you like it."

brice had settled. he had done so long ago, when he had agreed to marry his wife in the first place. perhaps even before that, when decided to go into finance because it was the safe option. since his early twenties, his life had been encased by a fog of routine, as if brice were on autopilot, not steering or direction his own life and merely walking forward through the easiest path that had been paved for him. that had led to success, considering his position and wealth, but all of that had meant nothing, the material possessions bringing no kindle the flame inside of him that had sat extinguished for so long, the soot heavy in his guts. levi had been the spark that brought him back and when he too had slipped through his fingers like smoke, brice had simply relied on established habits, throwing himself into his work. there had to be some kind of irony that his work had been what brought levi back to him. it remained to be determined to whether or not the older man wouldn't also flub this incandescent second chance. this time, brice clung to the younger man with a stronger, fiercer, more desperate grip. so he leaned into the similarly aggressive fervor from the younger man, grunting as he was pinned. "missed you too," he assured, voice thick and his body throbbing with need, letting his hand be guided. "i love it." i love you. a thought he was too chicken shit to let slip. the compliment came mere milliseconds after the request, though it was no less genuine for it. everything about levi was always stunning to him. "it suits you." tugging on the chain, he used the hold on the piece of jewelry to bring levi upwards, to close the gap between their lips and grind their mouths together in a bruising, territorial kiss.

"you don't really think that. not with that face." theo shakes his head. and how could anyone be looking at him when all he ever does is look at abel? he's beautiful everyone can see that. especially when he's wearing theo's jersey and he imagines abel in his lap riding his dick while fisting handfuls of it. hitting it from the back where his name would be stretched across his back. theo relishes in being the center of attention. and it is always the same no matter the city they find themselves in. "anyone attracted to me would be attracted to you." theo speaks it like there's no other possibility. what he says must be true, no? he reaches out to brush his finger along the hem of abel's shirt. irritated that the other things this random woman in the bar doesn't want him too. "most? who doesn't?"

but abel always came back. he always found a way to swallow back his own bitterness and move forward, even when theo's tongue lashed at him. abel's shield, his only protection, was to feign ignorance. that was his shield, had always been, and his arms lifted in a shrug. "that's where you're wrong. something i know that you don't like to hear," he maintained an impish expression, "but you're a star athlete. i'm a struggling comedian. i fade away in a crowd." not that he should, considering his tall frame, but he often slouched. dark eyes caught on theo's fingers as they traveled down, turning into slits heavy with want that he had to blinks way. "i don't know. just going with the law of averages. plus, some of your teammates are here...unless you all are gettin' up to things in the locker room i don't wanna know about..." he kept his tone light, as if he didn't want"