just fuck me up

"this reminded me of you" okay and you remind me of my future spouse, let's get married

Telling multiple women the same shit will literally always slap

Me telling everyone they're gonna die in less than five years

Relax

this shouldn’t have made me laugh so hard but I almost cried

You like Breaking Bad? You know that show has men in it, right? Are you seriously condoning that???

I know this is a parody but this is how tumblr really is

it’s not a parody

your friend group in your 20s will consist entirely of people who are either a) gay b) have the same trauma as you c) work with you or d) all of the above

and how could i possibly forget e) lives too far away from you to meet up irl more than once or twice a year

Same energy as that time in college I told a girl that “the tarot” says she needs to go call her mom and start going to therapy and she fucking did.

The desire to be beautiful is giving me brain damage

i don’t consume media to “have” “fun” i consume media in the same way catholic peasants lashed themselves in the streets in the 1300s

there's something stupid going inside my head