…sometimes I forget that not everyone knows what being controlled through religion is like, so I will now try to explain it. I grew up in a controlling religious household.
Think of something that you just know is true. It’s just common sense, it just makes sense, of course you believe in it. Whenever you show any sense of doubt, people around you visibly react as if you claimed the earth was flat. You’ve believed in this thing your entire life, at least you think you have, because you don’t remember a time before it. If you ever have doubts, people that you trust with your whole heart immediately tells you that this thing is true, and why would they lie to you?
And then, one day, a stranger comes up to you. They ask you if you believe in the thing. What would you say? Would you lie out of embarrassment? Probably not.
A big part of controlling someone is isolation. That’s why cults often isolate their members from the rest of the world, or speak badly about people who aren’t part of the cult. This doesn’t necessarily have to mean that you never interact with anyone with different beliefs, it can manifest as the people around you constantly telling you that your beliefs are the only ones that make sense. That everyone else is evil, or confused, or just lack knowledge about how the world works.
I have never been mormon, and i’ve never met a mormon person. But i’ve been the person who said ridiculous, strange things out loud without embarrassment. I can’t stress this enough, it feels like the truth to you! It feels like you’re saying that the earth isn’t flat! It doesn’t feel humiliating because why would it? You believe that it’s true.
The thing is, if you start having actual, serious doubts, your whole world falls apart. It’s terrifying. It’s not something that I would wish on my worst enemy. After all, if this wasn’t true, everything you thought you knew about the world could be false, too. And what if you’re wrong? You could be destroying your relationships with everyone you love over nothing.
Please try to understand that if you’ve grown up around people who taught you actual science and reason, that doesn’t make you better than anyone else, it just means you’re lucky. I believe that everyone should have that experience, not just the ones that happen to get lucky. But people who have “weird” beliefs are usually either experiencing some sort of psychosis, or being controlled by someone who wants power over them. Saying that their beliefs are “embarrassing” or “humiliating” does usually not help, it can make the whole thing worse, because it isolates them further. Especially if someone is telling them that the rest of the world hates them and lacks knowledge and just doesn’t understand. Especially if that person is trying to control them by doing this. That person can then be like “See? They don’t understand us. They hate us. They think we’re embarrassing.” Even calling it “weird” like I did could possibly be an issue, depending on the group/belief, but I wasn’t sure what else to call it.