Sparkling sub

Another giveaway….

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One of the most surprising aspects of wife led marriage is the asymmetric nature of sex. Few wives can imagine how different their sex life becomes when they assume a position of dominance in the marriage.   In most marriages sex is essentially symmetric, or at least idealized as such. When one partner is in the mood, usually the husband, he works to arouse the other or, more commonly, simply initiates sex with, if he is in any way a gentleman, the expectation of mutual satisfaction. But wife led marriage is different… In a wife led marriage, the wife controls sex. Either she allows her husband to indicate an interest, to which she responds positively or negatively, or she reserves the initiation of sex entirely to herself. In either case, the wife is the gate keeper of sex. When she does choose to engage in sex, it is primarily focused on her satisfaction. She expects her husband to bring her to orgasm at least once, perhaps more, before there is any possibility of his own. So every sexual encounter in a wife led marriage arrives at a point where the wife has been satisfied but the husband has not. This makes sense because there is virtually no risk of a healthy husband failing to orgasm during sexual intercourse whereas there is considerable risk that he might before the wife, thus depriving her and ending the intimacy. The wife’s first orgasms, therefore, are achieved by means other than sexual intercourse. The possibilities are endless but usually involve manual or oral stimulation or the use of sex toys. But just as the wife decides when sex occurs, so does she decide how far it proceeds. In particular, she decides whether sex proceeds beyond her first orgasms. As a routine matter, the husband not only has no expectations about when or whether sex will happen but, as well, how far it will proceed when it does. As part of the transformation of the marriage, the wife may be scaling back her husband’s orgasms and, at the same time, increasing her own. How far can this go? Well, let us suppose that you decide to allow your husband an average of one orgasm a week. At the same time, you might indulge yourself each night. That would result in a ratio of 7:1. But you might allow him as few as a couple orgasms a month while you enjoy a quickie in the morning, another after work, and a more intimate and prolonged encounter in the evening. That is a ratio approaching 50:1. These ratios, while interesting, are irrelevant. Once you pass beyond 5:1 there is really no longer any meaningful connection between your orgasms and his, they become entirely different matters: his are a strict matter of discipline, the exact frequency that brings about optimal adoration and obedience while you can enjoy as many as you wish. In fact, the more sexual intimacy, the better for the marriage. That might seem incredible but for the fact that as you become ever more proficient in exercising erotic power in your marriage, your husband begins to derive ever greater happiness from your satisfaction. He will crave that morning quickie as much as you! Needless to say, this extreme asymmetry does not come about overnight. It develops naturally over time so that, gradually, eventually, both of you come to regard wife-centered sex as a normal aspect of wife led marriage…

Femdom, or Female Domination, is a subject being brought to the forefront of pop culture through music videos, TV shows, movies, Playgirl and Cosmopolitan magazines. It sounds fun, but do you know where to begin? Miss Veronica explains it all for beginners…

First you need to determine if he’s interested in being dominated. Chances are you’re reading this for one of two reasons: either he’s already indicated he is interested, or you’re interested and aren’t sure he is. Well if you already know he wants to be dominated, mission accomplished. If you don’t know, the easiest way is to ask him. Well, perhaps it’s not the easiest for you, but it’s definitely the most direct.

An important thing to find out before you start is what are he likes besides just being dominated. There are so many different definitions of domination and so many related fetishes. A few related fetishes may include feet, anal (giving or receiving, fingering, licking or fucking), spanking, bondage, leather, humiliation, cross-dressing, etc. Some men want to be punished physically while others want to be punished emotionally. Some just want to serve a woman and rewarded when they do it right. Some want to really be hurt while some only want the illusion. Finding out his particular pleasure (and yours!) is very important so everyone enjoys the adventure. After all, the whole point of domination is to fulfill fantasies and pleasures.

Don’t judge his fetishes, just determine which ones you want to include. Everyone has limits, so find yours. And find his. You want to cause pleasure, not panic. The best way to do this is to ask him. The idea of asking him may be frightening, somewhat awkward, and embarrassing. However, some of the things you will be doing require an amazing amount of trust. If you can’t talk to him, you aren’t ready for that level of trust. Just think of it as one of the sexiest conversations you’ve ever had. Honestly, if he has fantasies of being bound, asking him details about how to tie him will do nothing but make him focus on his fantasy. Odds are he’ll thank you for it a hundred times over.

Domination is partially about physical power and partially about the perception of being overpowered. The illusion of being completely helpless is a major key to why domination is so sexy. He’ll never be truly helpless because of the safety word (see the next paragraph for an explanation), but it’s your job to feed the illusion. It’s part of the game.

The last issue of preparation is the most important: safety. This isn’t the safe sex discussion. Chances are you’ve heard that lecture a hundred times over. (If you haven’t, look elsewhere for the mechanics of safe sex.) This safety issue is about the safety word. Pick a word that will never be mentioned as part of the hot, sweaty, dominating fun. In other words, don’t pick “no” or “stop” or “you’re hurting me”. Those might be said to make the game more realistic. Pick something completely off-the-wall like the make of your car, your favorite musician, or “Constantinople.” Just make sure it is something that can’t be confused with anything else except the desire to stop everything that’s happening. Here is where trust plays a crucial role. You must trust him enough to say the word when he needs to, and he must trust you enough that you’ll stop when he says the word. No matter what, everyone must stop when that word is spoken because someone isn’t comfortable. Discuss why the word was spoken. Just because he was uncomfortable with one thing doesn’t mean he won’t want to try twenty others. It doesn’t mean to stop dominating him altogether.

Domination….Begin:

First of all, relax. Chances are he’s not an expert at this either. He’ll be excited enough that you’re trying and willing, so you don’t need to be an expert. Remember that it’s a game. It’s just a temporary, role-playing game that’s supposed to be fun and sexy. Afraid you’ll laugh or won’t be able to pull it off? Just remember two things: 1. It’s role-playing, which means you literally play a role. You can act like a dominatrix just like acting in a play. You get to be someone else, so play it up! 2. He wants you to do this for his pleasure. You’re fulfilling a fantasy for him, which is one of the sexiest, most intimate things partners can do for each other. It won’t be so funny once you see the fire in his eyes.

Most men also love to hear a woman talk while being dominated. You can start small with whispers about how he isn’t allowed to move….how he isn’t allowed to touch you….how he can do nothing but wait for you to touch him. It’s will get his mind racing even more.

Clothing:

This is essential. Generally, men are visual creatures. This can really work to your advantage in the domination world. When men imagine being dominated, they almost always imagine the outfit. If he hasn’t told you his favorite dominatrix clothing, don’t worry. The basics are pretty standard, and you can always get suggestions from a friend or the internet. Think dark colors, a little slutty, and lots of texture.

Dark colors imply a harshness that is essential to the domination illusion. It’s hard to appear forceful in pale yellow. Red, royal blue, silver, and dark purple work well. But the most popular by far is black. You can also mix and match black with any other dark color. The most important thing is to wear something that makes you feel absolutely sexy. It’s hard to be a sex goddess if you’re worried how your thighs look. Dark and dramatic are essential in making you a sexy dominatrix.

You should also show some skin. Men love the visual, remember? Well go ahead and show it to him. Don’t worry about your non-model body. Remember, he’s submitting to you because he wants to. Because he thinks you’re sexy. Because he wants to see your body taking control of his. He’s going to love seeing your bare arms, your thong, your short skirt, your bare midriff….whatever you decide. Think of it as more bare skin you get to rub against him.

Clothing textures are important as well. Some of the more popular textures in domination are leather, latex, silk, satin, lace, and metal. Mixing them can be very fun. Leather boots coupled with satin panties and a latex top….each one is a different thrill when it slides against his skin, lips, tongue, etc. Your textures don’t have to match, they just have to provoke amazing sensations.

Lastly, don’t forget his fetishes. If he has a foot fetish, spend some time (and perhaps a little money) picking out some dynamite shoes. If he has an anal fetish, wear something that shows off your ass. If he has a spanking fetish, wear sparkly rings and paint your nails a gorgeous red. Be sure to focus on his fetish to flood his brain with his own desire.

The Rest:

Each man who wants to be dominated is different. The best piece of advice is to pay attention to his reactions. Not only is it arousing to watch a man get excited, but it will tell you what he likes and what you can do next.

For example, let’s say you have his arms pinned down while straddling him. If he’s straining to kiss you, take notice: he wants to kiss you. So what’s sexy and dominating? Making him wait for it. Tell him he can’t kiss you yet. Then to prove your power and test his obedience, lean down so close until he can feel your breath on his lips. You can even touch your tongue to each corner of his mouth. Anything to make him even crazier to kiss you. Make him wait. If he moves to kiss you, pull away. If he disobeys, punish him how you see fit. Assert your power! Listen to the way his breath hitches, the way he strains at your arms holding him down, the little whimper in the back of his throat. It’s sexy as hell and shows you how much he loves it. And when you finally let him kiss you, it’s the kiss of a starving man.

As another example, let’s say he loves giving oral sex (lucky girl). Straddle him just above his face and finger yourself. He can’t touch you, can’t do anything but watch you, smell you, and feel your heat. (Plus this isn’t all bad for you. You’re touching yourself exactly the way you want.) Make him beg if you want because you’re in charge. Then when you’re ready, let him lick you to his heart’s content. And yours. He thinks you’re rewarding him, but if he licks you to kingdom come, who’s really rewarded?

Now you get to learn the biggest benefit of dominating your man. Besides being the best girlfriend/lover ever for giving him fantasies, you’re also feeling sexier than ever. Everything’s hotter and more intimate. But here’s the icing on the cake: it’s the easiest way to teach him exactly how to please you. Wonder how? Well, the majority of men who like being dominated also like to be told what to do. They find it extremely sexy to touch you when and how you say.

So let’s say you’d like him to rub your clit more before sliding his fingers inside you. Well as his dominatrix, you can lay spread-eagle, put him on his knees between your legs, and instruct him exactly what to do and when. Don’t make it a how-to. Make demands. Remember, “making” him do it and controlling every action is exactly what he finds sexy. So tell him things like, “You can touch me right here. I will let you stroke me on the outside from bottom to top, slowly. If you don’t do it slow enough, you won’t get to do it again.” He’s in heaven because he gets to touch you, and he’s getting dominated. You’re in heaven because you’re getting exactly what you want. When you’re the dominatrix, phrase anything the right way (you are allowed to….I will let you….you must….do….now….) and you both get what you want. Find the words that make your man crazy with passion, and you can teach him anything you want. You come hard enough, and he’ll remember what he did so he can do it again.

Much of domination is teasing. Denying him the exact thing he wants until he can barely stand it is an extremely erotic way to dominate a man. Just remember, it’s not technically teasing because you actually reward him. (Which means please don’t actually tease him. That’s just mean.) This kind of teasing is just prolonging the pleasure to make it stronger. Remember, it’s about sensation, intimacy, and the illusion of power. The rest will take care of itself.

“Anything special I should wear mistress?”

Written by Mistress Ivey,

Many times teasing your partner can become difficult. The problem is coming up with imaginative ways to tease him so that things don’t become “stale” or “routine”. Well, I have good news. There is a website that is jam-packed with teases that you can use “as-is” or modify for your own special needs.

Milovana is a website dedicated to web teasing. They have literally hundreds of webteases. Most are designed for men, though there are a few for women. However, all the teases are designed for solo use. That means that the reader is supposed to masturbate as directed in the tease. Some of the teases involve pain of kind or another, and many require you to have certain “toys” during the tease. Almost all of them are excellent example of tease and denial.

So how does this help you? I would suggest that you read several of the tease and denial teases and see how you could adapt them to your own situation. In other words, how you can use them with your partner. Perhaps you want to become the person guiding the tease and order your partner to do the things the tease call for. Or… You can become a part of the tease by doing the things listed in the tease to your partner instead of making him do them to himself. Your participation would greatly increase the pleasure you both obtain from the tease.

If you are really into tease and denial, you should be able to find many of the webteases useful. For example, you want your partner to remain in chastity (orgasm free) for a month. Try this: once a week, remove his chastity device and perform one of the teases from Milovana to tease and deny him an orgasm. By the end of the month, he will be more than willing to do whatever you want in order to get that orgasm. It won’t be long before you are coming up with tease and denial scenes of your own.

So give Milovana a try and see what ideas you can come up with. You might even break a webtease up into several parts and have him perform a portion of it each day (or night, as the case may be). Anyway, it will be entertaining and there is a great deal of potential for some real excitement…

Here is my chastity training philosophy, in a nutshell:

There is no more effective way to train men than through their cocks/orgasms.

Yeah, yeah…there will always be exceptions. But seriously…this is it. Men are incredibly easy to train if you understand what drives them…

Some women and men have the opinion that keeping a male sub in constant, long (or very long) term chastity is the most effective way to train. I completely disagree. The reason for this is simple: if a man knows his cock will never be allowed to come, then the orgasm ceases to become a motivation, or a carrot, if you will.

So here is what I do. I use the cock/orgasm to reprogram and condition my slave. So what follows involves using chastity as a training device rather than as a punishment or way of life. Basic steps look something like this:

1. The chastity device…

There are many versions out there, but for this to work, this needs to be a device that is secure and lock-able. I must have the key. I have the power over his cock and he cannot escape. This is an enormously powerful and symbolic message.

2. Putting it on…

Eventually, wearing the chastity device will become second nature – but you must set the example, set the stage, the first few times that you put the cage on. The manner and words and attitude that you adopt when you put this on him for the first time will stay with him as he wears it, and going forward, how he feels about wearing it. The first few times I make sure that he knows how meaningful this is…that I am purposefully choosing to take control of his body, that I am taking his cock, his symbol of masculinity, away from him. Owning it. Controlling it. Mine. For as long as I wish. I make him beg me to put it on. I make him watch as I lock it. I make him thank me for doing it.

3. The Rules…

Now, I have him. He’s mine. Seriously. What will a man not do to have his cock, his pleasure? Both are now mine to command. It is best to have thought this out very carefully before locking him in. Chastity training is very powerful and making mistakes here isn’t desirable.

For the best results, these three components are essential:

# Begin with (potentially) brief and clear-cut stints in chastity… # Make the things he must do to get out of chastity and/or earn his orgasm very straightforward and obtainable… # Keep Your Promises…

If you want chastity to be an effective tool, he must see that his behavior is directly tied to his release. At first, the cause/effect correlation must be very clear. Most importantly, you must keep your word. If you say that he will be allowed release from chastity after he has made you breakfast in bed five days in a row, then you must keep your promise. There are lots of memes out there depicting women changing their mind about allowing their men out of chastity. For initial training purposes, this is an absolutely horrible idea. If your sub loses faith in the cause and effect nature of chastity, he will ultimately cease to trust that his behavior will have any impact on his release – thus lessening the power of your ‘threats’.

Now, once his brain has become re-wired and he realizes that he must behave…your timelines can become longer, the tasks more complicated, and you can occasionally change the rules. But I repeat – this should only be done after you have effectively broken him and trained him.

The benefits of male chastityThe benefits of male chastity

My rules tend to force him to focus on my pleasure – to force his brain to begin associating my pleasure as a prerequisite to his. Example: He must give me a certain amount orgasms before he is released. Now, I don’t need chastity to have him do this. First, he’s happy to lick my pussy at any time. Second, I could just tell him to lick my pussy at any time. So… why connect this to chastity? Because this is more than him deciding, or me giving an order. This is my choice to literally re-wire his brain to associate my orgasms to his own pleasure. And I don’t keep what I’m doing a secret. I want him to know what I am doing. I want him to know that his body is just the tool I’m using to control his mind. Of course, I add other things on as well, but my pleasure should always come first.

4. The Reward….

Any time the chastity device is taken off, it should be clear that it is a kindness that you are bestowing upon him. Before it is taken off, the rules of his behavior should be crystal clear to him. Is he allowed to have a full orgasm immediately, or at a certain time? For the most effective training, I recommend that immediately following his release, you arrange for an incredibly powerful, satisfying orgasm. One that YOU take part in– either directly, or indirectly. This intense pleasure will reinforce how desirable it is to be out of chastity, and how hard he should be willing to do whatever it takes to earn his freedom from it.

Later, once he has been conditioned and well trained, he will be grateful for a ruined orgasm…for being allowed to touch his cock at all. But for initial training, the orgasm should follow as soon after release as possible. Again, this is quite literally re-wiring his brain to associate you and your control of him with pleasure.

Important Tips:

- If you keep your sub in long term (longer than a month at a time) chastity, it is important for his health that you milk his prostate monthly. This can have the added bonus of highlighting your absolute control over his body.

- Be sure that you understand how to properly fit and install a chastity device.

- An improper fit can cause un-fun pinching or cause un-fun bruising or blood flow problems.

- If you intend to keep your sub in chastity for longer than a day, make sure that you are using a device that will allow for air, and proper hygiene.

The fantasy of having a “Hotwife” is growing, in fact, research shows it is growing at a higher rate than a good majority of the other lifestyle alternatives, including the old staple of “swinging” and the modern “open relationship”.  Why is it that a fantasy that revolves around only one part of a relationship – the woman – going out and finding pleasure from another man more intriguing to an increasing number of men than going out and “getting some” for himself?  

Basic psychology tells us that men are highly competitive creatures.  They have a drive to compete with other males of the species for the best mate – this isn’t so much different than what happens in the animal kingdom.  Most men have an innate drive to compete with other men when it comes to the “best mate” or the “most attractive woman”.  With this being said, one of the reservations of most women who find out about their husband or partner’s Hotwife fantasy is that he is somehow “weaker” than the rest because he wants to give up his position as your only partner.  Is this really true, though?  Could the truth lie somewhere within today’s man’s loss of natural competition in everyday life, and a desire to maintain a level of competition after marriage or “monogamy”?  Is this weakness, or rather the ultimate confidence?  

Cuckholding aside, because this aspect of the fantasy requires a bit more in terms of a “woman led” relationship, and a bit more from the man in terms of a desire for mental sadomasochism, a good majority of men enjoy the idea that they have been able to “capture” the best mate and even when she’s out having amazing physical and emotional experiences with men who may have qualities that actually supersede their own – a better body, a larger cock, youth, more prowess in bed – their woman actually WANTS to come back to them at the end of the night.  While most Hotwife-Husbands do get some level of turn-on from the jealousy and the possibility that their Hotwife may actually be enjoying their dates more than they enjoy being “at home”, the overwhelming desire is the competition and the “win” in terms of having a wife who chooses them again and again even after being allowed to go out and have other men.  

As Hotwives, we may be the focus of the fantasy, but there is that deeper and more psychological desire of a man who, even after committing to one woman, is able to compete with other males sexually.  This is why the desire for “reclaiming” a Hotwife after a date is so strong – it’s actually been scientifically proven that men who are able to reclaim a partner after she has been with someone else have an increase in testosterone levels, which means stronger desire, more powerful erections, longer lasting erections, and an overall stronger sex drive.  So, what does this mean for us as Hotwives?

He Enjoys the Jealousy, Go with It

As women we’ve learned that inducing some jealousy can actually be a good thing when it comes to dating – before we’ve found our “person”.  We use our female prowess to keep the men who we are seeing guessing…why?  Because they seem more interested in us when it seems as though we may not be 100% there.  So, if this works in the dating world, why wouldn’t it work once we’re married? In contrast, women typically don’t respond as well, or in the same way to jealousy – we tend to worry, question, and sometimes shut down if we feel that he might be “just not that into us”.  Naturally, because of our own feelings on the matter, we tend to avoid making our men jealous once we’ve committed to them, because we, ourselves don’t want to feel as though we’re in constant competition with other, more attractive, sexier, younger, etc., women.  Why would we do something to the man that we love that we, ourselves, would hate?

For men, though, and especially those with Hotwife fantasies, jealousy is a big component and tool for us to keep our men hot and bothered.  Sometimes just the mere mention of being flirted with by that cute guy at our favorite restaurant, or our interest in the sexy personal trainer at the gym is enough to send our men into a sexual frenzy.  It doesn’t take a lot to feed the fantasy.  It’s not ALL about dates and recounting how well we got worked over in the bedroom (and how much we loved it), though that is the ultimate turn on for our men, it’s also about the little things – the mention of our interest in someone else, the sexy messages that we send to potential lovers or Bulls, the “tease” of how much we loved what our last Bull did for us and how much we’re looking forward to doing it again.  Remember, this ignites the “competition” element of things, which is natural for men.

The More You Enjoy it, the More He Enjoys it

You may be thinking, “But I’m doing it for him, I’m not doing it for myself” (a common theme by A LOT of Hotwives), but in reality, our men WANT us to enjoy our encounters. They want to hear about what this “other guy” did for or to is that sent us over the edge, and yes, they want to hear what we liked better about the “other guy”.  I know it seems crazy, because we don’t want to imagine our men, even if we did allow them to be with other women, thinking that their “others” were better, sexier, hotter or had something that we don’t.  That’s because we don’t have that “competition drive” like our men do.

Let’s face it, despite what our men tell us – “It’s all about your pleasure” or “I don’t get anything out of it unless you’re enjoying it, because I love you so much” – this isn’t some ultimate “unselfish” thing our men are doing for us.  These things come out of their mouths, but what they are really saying is “I want to know that you came three times while he was fucking you, and you STILL want to come home to me”.  It’s their kink, and we have to understand it.  

So, if you’ve actually taken the step into the world of Hotwifing, you’re going to have to learn how to properly tease your man into believing that, just maybe, your Bull was better than him in some ways.  Whenever you think “But I’m only doing it for him”, follow that us with “I’m doing it for him and he WANTS to know that I absolutely enjoyed it”.  Find some aspect of your encounter that was mind-blowing, and recount, in great detail exactly what it was that sent you over the edge.  This may require a little bit of embellishment, and that’s OKAY…trust me…embellishment is your friend in this situation.  Tell your man about your Bull’s amazing cock, how good if felt, how good he tasted, how fantastic he was at oral sex, etc.  These are the things that will ramp up that competition streak in your man and make him want to reclaim you with increased vigor and desire.  

The More You Want Someone Else, The More Your Man Wants You

Again, you’re playing on the competition and the teasing aspect of things here…  The more that you act as if you WANT to be a Hotwife, the more that your husband or partner is going to WANT you.  His desire for you is going to skyrocket, his sexual desire for you is going to make it so that he’s ready to chew his own leg off to get you back in bed.  I have experienced this firsthand many times…if I am completely honest about an “encounter” and admit to “D” that my Bull was lacking in some way, or I didn’t quite “get there”, he isn’t nearly as turned on as when I tell him about how amazing things were.  I don’t like or believe in lying, but I do advocate for being selective and stretching the truth…maybe your lover wasn’t the best at giving oral sex, but maybe he was an amazing kisser, so a good answer would be “he was amazing with his mouth” and leave the rest up for interpretation.  

We’re women.  We are strong and capable and we are smart.  And the truth is, this is a GAME we are playing for and with our husbands/partners, so we need to get our heads into the game. Furthermore, this is an intellectual game, and we need to use our intellects to get to where we want to be.  Where do we want to be?  We want to have a husband/partner who is absolutely drooling over us, believes we are the ultimate sexual goddess, and in is jealous enough to realize that in order to “compete” they will need to step up their own game in order to “keep” us satisfied – be that with amazing sex, extra romance, other rewards, or all of the above.  

Happy Hotwifing!

Is to gently wake up my sleeping boy.

Is to grind my hips into his whispering how much I need him.

Is to allow him to roll over, legs parting on instinct as he whispers; “Than take me. Use me.”

Is to finger him open, one finger at a time until he’s a trembling, leaking, fucking himself onto my fingers kind of mess.

Is to take my strap-in and let him ride me.

Is to touch him all over, in whatever way I see fit as I claim his lips.

Is to control how he rides me by holding on to his hips.

Is to scoop up his precum and coat my lips with it, not allowing him to kiss me until permission is given.

Is to hear him beg to be fed every drop he cries for me.

Is to touch the tip of my cock, making him leak even more.

Is to hear his broken warnings. I know he can cum from this.

Is to digg my fingernails into his butt cheeks as I possessively growl out whatever comes to mind.

Is to reach around to that special place where our bodies are connected and hear the intake of breath as I tease his rim.

Is to hear him moan out my name and his needs. Over and over, like a prayer.

Is to eventually grant him permission to cum and watch how my words sink in.

Is to hear, and see, and feel how my boy’s orgasm washes over him.

Is to all but have him collapse on top of me as he whispers words of gratitude against my lips.

Is to, without being prompted, have him slip off of my strap-in and kiss his way down my body, effectively cleaning me up as he goes.

Is to let him worship my soaked pussy exactly how I want it; like he’s savouring the world’s most exquisite dish.

Is to allow my babyboy to scent mark his entire body with my juices.

Is to have as many orgasms as I want before taking him back in my arms, tasting myself on his lips as we drift off, our bodies still entwined.

Is to wake up and start this all over again.

This is a rule I strictly enforce. He has adapted over time so that he can wear his chastity device at all times now so I keep it locked on him unless I play with him. I’m not as strict as some women when it comes to rationing his orgasms.

I generally only make him wait seven to fourteen days between releases. However, I am very strict in how he has that orgasm. I never give him the slightest chance to masturbate on his own.

Before his chastity device is removed, he is restrained very well. Whether I fuck him, use my hand, or just tease and deny him is purely my choice and I never tell him in advance what I am going to do to him. He is helpless and just along for the ride. It is locked back on every time before releasing him from the restraints.

The reason I do it this way every time is because I want to ensure he isn’t thinking about some random woman when he feels the pleasure, but is thinking about me personally. I want him conditioned to lust for and be obsessed with only me.

He has to look at me the whole time. He can’t close his eyes or look away from me or I will stop touching him. If he isn’t looking me directly in the eye when he orgasms, he will wait longer for release the next time.

His pleasure and orgasms belong to me as much as his body does and I enjoy the intimacy doing it this way creates. Watching the pure pleasure on his face when he ejaculates followed by the look of gratitude he feels for me afterwards makes it exciting for me.

1. You must take total control of his orgasms.

You must get him to wear a chastity device of some kind.

You should put it on him yourself and only you should hold the key.

Let him out at your discretion only and only for teasing or release.

Teach him that he must EARN his orgasms.

2. You must control your own feelings of guilt.

He should never be permitted to have any kind of orgasm without your permission.

If you feel he deserves an orgasm… Ruin it!

Remember, you can ruin several orgasms a day, but he can only have one full one.

Full orgasms should only happen on very special occasions.

3. You must get into his head.

Learn his fantasies and what turns him on.

Tease him with your words whenever possible.

Find out what embarrasses and humiliates him.

Use his humiliation fears against him.

4. You must keep him sexually aroused as much as possible.

Talk sexy to him.

Tell him you are going to make him do something humiliating.

Fondle him, or let him fondle you.

Send him text messages with orders to do something sexual.

Make him give you orgasms frequently.

5. You must make him do something humiliating.

Make him wear a butt-plug in public.

Order him to be naked when you are not.

Make him masturbate for you.

Always, ALWAYS make him eat his own cum no matter where it is deposited.

6. You must punish him whenever he displeases you.

Don’t let him get away with anything!

Spank, paddle, or whip him.

Humiliate him in some way.

Put Bengay or Icy-Hot on his cock, balls, or anus.

Make him do what he hates.

7. You must find ways to constantly tease him, and keep him on edge.

Fondle him through his pants in public (or in private).

Whisper sexy or humiliating things in his ear.