To Build Castles In The Air

“Let’s get drunk at midnight, listen to our favorite songs and kiss so much that our lips burn.”

“I hope you love yourself as hard as you fought for him”

Sometimes I want to forget about what happened and just move on. Make pretend like nothing happened. I wish I could make our memories stop tasting like old apples. Maybe erase the night we fought in your car while a stupid love song played in the background. I wish I could stop remembering your scent everywhere I go. It’s like you’re always next to me, but instead you’re elsewhere doing something else with someone else. I can’t forget about us or what we were before our reality burned like if it was a sin. Quite honestly I wish you could apologize. Go down on your knees and tell me that I’m the only person you need. But that’s a crazy thing to imagine because even though we once were something special, it’s obvious that I was the only one who saw it.

The idea of someone else not being able to keep their hands off my body is literally intoxicating

I need you to know that your level of intelligence and finding yourself in a toxic relationship have NO CORRELATION. You are not dumb, stupid or unintelligent for falling for a toxic partner, friend or family member. You can be incredibly smart and still find yourself in this situation. You simply opened your heart and gave it a shot with someone who you only later found out was unhealthy. It is NOT YOUR FAULT or the fault of your IQ that you got trapped in their manipulative, controlling tricks.

grief, i’ve learned, is really just love. it’s all the love you want to give but cannot. all that unspent love gathers up in the corners of your eyes, the lump in your throat, and the hollow part of your chest. grief is just love with no place to go.