south park anthology

summary: token and kyle's friendship is tested when token accidently becomes part of a hate group. meanwhile, cartman involves himself in some non-pc ways before he's even sure who he should side with.

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Jewface

by mr. petuski (spanthology)

token hangs out with kyle's family where he is asking questions about judaism, and concludes that it's pretty neat. he says that his own parents are too busy to talk to about this kind of stuff. unfortunately shiela cuts it off and says it's time for him to go home because its time to go to a hanukkah party (or some other jewish thing) in denver that is only for jews, token seems disappointed but then kyle convinces his mom to let him come.

at the denver synagogue, token gets allot of looks, second class treatment, and passive aggressive reading of the torah emphasizing parts about "god's chosen people", and how 'gentiles' aren't as special as real jews. token gets fed up and leaves while kyle is distracted by the festivities and forgets about him. on his way to the bus token meets some black hebrew israelites who tell him that he is one of god's chosen people, and that everyone in the bible was actually black. token goes along with it thinking that they're just another sect of judaism that is more accepting of him.

kyle's family is leaving the event when they get harassed by a group of black hebrew israelites with a megaphone. kyle asks who those people are and the rabbi explains that they're an anti-semitic hate group that are best ignored.

at school, as kyle tells stan, kenny, and cartman about getting harassed (cartman likes what he's hearing), token comes up and tells kyle about his new friends and what they taught him about the jews. token says this with his normal level of positivity, while kyle's expression shifts from happy to disappointed to shocked to outraged as he recognizes the talking points from what the BHI people were yelling at him. he tells token that he shouldn't hang out with those people because they're a cult and a hate group, but token sees what kyle is doing as just more intolerance and gatekeeping and so he doubles down and calls kyle a racist. cartman is very confused by this.

token attends a BHI meeting where he learns that they practice veganism, hold their congregations at a church, and use the king james bible as their holy book. he asks about the christian stuff and they tell him more about their version of history; that all the europian royal families and ancient civilizations were black and there's a giant conspiracy to hide this from the public. the BHI people move on to the next topic which is opening a new chapter in south park. token claims that there are lots of people there that he can get to join.

kyle's family (maybe just gerald) encounters BHI protesters who are now in south park. gerald decides he has to do something, and after some warnings from the townsfolk around him about the protesters having cameras and social media following, gerald reassures everyone that he's a lawyer and he knows what he's doing. gerald then goes up to them and delivers a karen style tirade that makes him look incredibly racist and it instantly goes viral.

at school, kyle sees token in full hebrew attire and tries to talk with him. he says he's been doing research on BHI and explains to token that some of their rhetoric is lifted straight from actual nazi conspiracy theories about jews. token doesn't listen and instead brings up the video of kyle's dad and they both become angrier. in class, token does a show and tell about his religious traditions which are just bastardized versions of what kyle's family told him about earlier. this leads to kyle having outbursts that get him in trouble with pc principle

in detention, cartman (who is there for doing some actual messed up thing unrelated to token) tells kyle that he wants to help him. cartman then shares a plan for them to wear blackface and infiltrate BHI to sabotage them. kyle expresses his disapproval but cartman retorts by saying there's no difference between them wearing blackface and token wearing jewface. but kyle insists that he stay out of this because he'll only make things worse.

token, still naive to the racial exclusivity of his group, tries to invite craig, tweek, clyde, jimmy, and others to attend their next meeting, but they all refuse when they find out it's a religious thing. he then tries niccole and tells her about the BHI version of history. niccole laughs at him and calls it ridiculous, and token reveals that he doesn't actually believe it either, but he thinks that stories that can give them a meaningful identity are good even if they aren't strictly true, but niccole isn't buying it.

at the mayor's office, a group of concerned jews gathers to complain. soon after, a group of BHI come in to complain as well. the mayor proves unhelpful though as she thinks this is no more than a theological dispute that she cannot get involved in. but then a BHI person spots a newspaper framed on the wall about the founding of south park, and claim that a drawing in it of a clearly white person with an obvious coffee stain on it is proof that south park was founded by black people.

kyle is having dinner with his family when he starts asking if there was any basis for what token was saying. after being appalled that kyle would even ask these things, shiela admits that the jews in biblical times probably did have darker skin and that some jews might of gone to africa during the diaspora. this is enough for kyle to start feeling a bit guilty. but just then the doorbell rings and it turns out to be black people asking for 100+ years worth of unpaid rent. when gerald says that he is the home owner and they aren't, the visitors claim that their ancestors owned it first but it was stolen, and gerald's deed is meaningless. they end with an ultimatum: do this the easy way and start paying rent or the hard way -he gestures to a phone tucked menacingly in his waistband. this makes gerald jump back in fear.

token is waiting at the entrance of the new church for people to show up. eventually cartman shows up in black face and a giant afro speaking in ebonics. token immediately recognizes him and confronts him on why he's there. after a while of arguing that he's not cartman, he finally concedes to being cartman but claims he's just feeling guilty about all the jew and black jokes he's made, and claims he's there to learn. token tells cartman he's never ever going to let him in so he better just go home, but just then BHI people arrive and are impressed that token has already recruited someone, and insinuate that token would be in huge trouble if this new chapter failed to recruit anyone like he promised. cartman slips back into character and token reluctantly goes along with it.

inside, token tries to serve homemade matzah ball soup, but the BHI people reject it for its yiddish origins. a preacher delivers a sermon which is actually just a rant about the white jews being devils, and about black africans (whom they don't believe they're related to) being evil for selling the real jews into slavery. this makes cartman extremely confused again and he goes to token afterwards and confesses, saying that kyle ordered him to come there to sabotage, but now cartman has a change of heart and offers to help token instead. token tells cartman to just stay out of it because he'll only make things worse.

token goes up to the preacher to ask some questions but gets cut off by him. the preacher claims that upon investigation, it turns out that south park was the place where black jew native americans first discovered the new world thousands of years ago, and they figured this all out using a newspaper from the 1800s. token hesitantly expresses some skepticism, and the preacher tells him that token's family would be the last surviving natives of south park, and that when judgment day happens, token would get to inherit all the property in park county.

kyle, stan, and kenny are on their way to token's house for kyle to try and make a new case to get token out of this cult. kyle and stan both share stories of black people showing up at their houses claiming to own them, but then they walk past a bunch of new construction and ask the workers what it is. they are then informed that this is part of a new black resettlement project, and park county is now called 'hebrew jewish kosher israeli promise land of new judea'. kyle realizes this has to all be tied back to the BHI people and tries to keep going but gets stopped at a checkpoint run by BHI people who don't let them through.

token's parents come home chatting about all the friendly new people in town. when they see token in his star of david shirt, they assume he's been continuing to hang out with kyle. token says he's found new hebrew friends but his parents barely seem to notice. he then says they need to raise money to build a new temple and asks to get an early allowance, when his dad says he can borrow his credit card, token adds that he's going to get a menorah face tattoo as well. token leaves before his parents register what he just said.

kyle's family is getting ready to go to an anti-hate rally, and kyle comments that this might just make things worse. gerald relays that BHI is trying to destroy the south park synagogue to build their new temple. in the background cartman has snuck in and has started helping them get ready and making small talk. kyle then notices him and asks what he's doing here. trying to conceal the fact that his phone is recording, cartman claims he just wants to support them in their cause, then asks subtle probing questions about how they made their money and what they've done to cover up history. kyle figures out what he's doing and tells him to leave. cartman says he was forced by token to spy for him, but kyle sees through this as well. he explains to cartman that BHI doesn't just hate white jews; they hate all white people, and that includes him. cartman yet again is extremely confused, and just as he begins to offer to join back with his side, kyle cuts him off and urgently insists that he not get anymore involved. a crowd of white protesters marches up the street and the broflovskis go out to join them. cartman calls butters and tells him it's time for plan c.

token, now with a menorah tattoo on his forehead, is out with a crowd of BHI people as they yell at people from the sidewalk. token tries using the megaphone but isn't very good at being hateful. then the angry mob that kyle is in shows up to protest them. then an even angrier mob of orthodox jews shows up and joins them and starts making death threats and saying extremely offensive things. kyle asks what they're doing here, and the rabbi from denver says they're from israel and explains that whenever there's a dispute between religious groups, fundamentalists always come in to try and make it a holy war, but that's okay because otherwise their team might not have had the number advantage. the BHI people then unveil a bulldozer and begin driving it towards the synagogue. they state that once the synagogue is demolished and the temple is built, armageddon will come about and they'll be able to rule the earth for a thousand years and make all the races they don't like into slaves. they end by thanking token for the financing that made this possible.

kyle steps forward to make a last ditch effort to convince token that he's in a cult. token is again put off by this and takes the megaphone to rant against the jews for being arrogant gatekeepers that can't even pretend that someone else could be special like they claim to be. kyle then realizes he's been looking at this the wrong way and apologizes for not seeing how the denver synagogue was treating him, and offers to be by his side if he still wants to convert to judaism. token forgives him and apologizes for how he's been acting but adds that he understands that not every group has to be open to everyone, and that he's okay with embracing his actual african american heritage.

token tries to call off the bulldozer it doesn't work. a fight breaks out between the BHI people and the protesters and kyle and token are unable to stop it. but suddenly butters jumps out in front of the synagogue in blackface and starts beatboxing, then cartman comes in dressed as a rabbi and they both start rapping about jews and blacks coming together and moving far away and leaving south park alone (maybe a parody of dna by kendrick lamar). this somehow moves the crowd to put aside their differences and the orthodox jews end up inviting the black hebrew israelites to move back to israel with them.

token rubs off his face tattoo which turns out to be non-permanent. token's parents walk up to see what all the commotion was, and when they see what's been going on they decide they need to be more attentive. token and kyle have a final exchange where token says he's excited to learn about his own family history and how they overcame slavery and jim crow laws, and maybe he'll even start listening to rap. but then token's parents chime in to tell him that they're actually african immigrants with no history of slavery or dealling with jim crow, and that token's grandmother was actually a white jew, and that they're related the ethiopian royal family and that's why they're so rich.