do i belong here?

“Let’s go then!” Eliza couldn’t contain the grin that spread across her face. She grabbed the proffered hand and tugged him into a stumbling half run. The wind on her face was refreshing - blew away the stress of the day, the unnatural warmth of the banquet hall. It was metaphorical and physical freedom, and the sunset was rising to meet her as she stepped downhill, footfalls fast and gentle on the gravel. She’d not escaped a banquet since she had been a child - and it was ridiculously freeing to do so.

They slowed to a walk again, on a street, not so busy as the place that they’d left behind, and windblown, wild-eyed, she pointed at a cozy-looking storefront. “That’s it right there.” She’d found it walking home from a visit to one of her students and fell in love with atmosphere, the friendly and tight-knit staff, so much so that it was becoming one of her regular haunts. “Let’s duck in?” 

He almost stumbled forward, a laugh finding its way from his chest and towards the outside world. He really shouldn´t have left with her like that, not without telling Nathalie at least, but the fact of the matter was: She probably wouldn´t notice. And he couldn´t bring himself to turn around, so he didn´t. 

Instead he went along and held onto her hand maybe a little longer than it was necessary as they eventually slowed down. “Looks cozy,” Patrick then nodded before he reached out to hold the door open for her. “How did you find this place?” He did spend a lot of time walking around the city from meeting to meeting, but he hadn´t come across this gem before.

“Hmm,” Eliza hummed, mischief still alight in her face, “Would you say I’m middling company then? Eliza Skylar, piano teacher, student, middling company on the lawns of charity balls.” She did like making him smile - he’d seemed to her to have been so weary when she’d happened upon him outside, by himself. “Congratulations to you and your fiancee. You’re sure they won’t mind I’ve borrowed you?” She hummed again - as if deep in thought. “Think Angelica will kill you for that too - she really is the best big sister.” They had their rough patches, like any other siblings - but Eliza loved Angelica, and that was that.

They’d stopped swaying for the moment, standing still in the grass, under the light of the setting sun, growing violet in the distance. Her hands in his suddenly - had no meaning. She’d made up her mind to be spontaneous - for once. “Well, we could make a run for it now - don’t know about you but I’d kill for some ramen. Banquet food isn’t very filling - besides, there’s always someone staring at you when you’re trying to stuff mini-eclairs in your face in peace.” Eliza ducked her head - pinking in embarrassment in spite of herself. “So how about it? It’ll be thirty minutes to figure out we’re gone and another thirty minutes to find us. There’s a shop a short walk that way - promise I’ll get you back to your fiancee within the hour?” 

Patrick almost dropped his smile until he realized that she was joking. He let out a laugh, shaking his head. “Oh no. I would say that you´re excellent company. Better than any I´ve encountered this evening,” He was then quick to add. Skylar. He knew who she was now. Or at leas the family she was part of. He´d heard Nathalie talk about them often enough and well, if Eliza offered to take him out for a little while surely nobody would complain? He was making conversation and friends after all.

To be fair - she had been expecting that answer. He seemed rather lovely, so it - well, it made sense. “I’m glad I’m not awful company, at least,” Eliza glanced as she turned, over her shoulder and back toward the open doors of the banquet hall. She understood, she thought - it was terribly hot in there, and filled to the brim with insincere people who said insincere things merely because they wanted something, or because it was a game to entertain themselves for the night. “You’re -  married, then? Maybe?” She grinned, simply for lack of any other thing to do - really, it seemed all she did was smile at him, in spite of all of it. “Don’t worry - I won’t tell. You can have this hiding spot to yourself a little while longer.”

Eliza’s eyes glinted with mischief at the question. “Well, I don’t estimate my sister will come looking for me for another half hour. Then she’ll march out with murder in her eyes and demand to know who I was considering elopement with.” She laughed in spite of herself - imagining Angelica descending on poor, unsuspecting Patrick like a real guardian angel, ready to smite him for stepping on her toes. “Though you’ll be less dead when she finds out you’re spoken for. Or double dead. Depends, really.” 

“Oh no. Not awful at all.” Patrick was quick to say. She was actually quite easy to be around and there was something about her laugh that made him smile. It was nice not having to pretend for once. Which...was probably a thought he should keep far into the back of his mind. “Oh no. Not married. Engaged.” They had been for quite a while, actually. Nathalie seemed to enjoy the wedding planning though she was also focusing on her career so there was no rush. They´d been together so long, what was another year? Or two.

“Patrick,” Eliza smiled, and made a note to remember. She’d glimpsed over the name, she’s sure, on her guest-list. The list was always a mile long - but she made an effort to try to recognize everyone in any case. “Thank you for dancing with me.” 

She probably - probably would’ve felt silly otherwise. After all, she was no longer a child, but a full-grown woman, dancing barefoot in made-up, half stumbling steps in the grass. Though there was never any true set of rules regarding decorum, the gossip surely would go around, if she had been spotted by someone more conservative.

Though - it did seem to be safe, at the moment. She estimated she wouldn’t be missed for another twenty or so minutes yet. “I hope I’m not keeping you - is there someone that might be looking for you, Patrick? 

Patrick returned the smile and nodded. “It was a pleasure.” He´d always been someone who preferred the carefree attitude. Maybe not so much during the last couple of years, but the feeling of wanting to break free from these parties where everything was perfect, and perfectly fake, was still there. That might have also been the reason why he´d come out here in the first place.

“See?” Her grin had only grown wider, quite sincere, but pleased and devious like the cat that’s gotten the cream. “You’re not half bad at all.” Laughing, she spun out and then twisted in, moving them in a circular motion across the grass.

He seemed to be enjoying himself, and that made her smile too. It was rarer and rarer that people were allowed to enjoy themselves at these parties as she had grown up. Eliza supposed she enjoyed them as a child, before she’d known anything or held any responsibility - enveloped by the excitement and the wonder of it all, dressed up like a little princess. Every child’s dream, probably.

“I’m Eliza, by the way,”  It had been ages since she’d led a dance - not since Peggy was learning to waltz, she thought. The corners of her eyes crinkled with mirth. “Eliza Skylar. And you are?”

He couldn´t remember the last time he had just shimmied around like this. It wasn´t like Patrick wasn´t here for it, there had been a time when he definitely had been, but with work driving him mad he simply didn´t have time to go out to anything that wasn´t a fancy work party. 

He smiled, taking her hand and swirling her around a little just for the fun of it. She seemed to be enjoying herself just as much as he was, if not more, and ther e was something infectious about her laughter.

“Come on,” Eliza grinned at the man, wriggling her fingers at him. “My toes can take it. Just one little dance, please?” The music pouring through the open doors and windows of the banquet hall was enchanting and she found herself swaying to it almost subconsciously. “There’s nobody here - something goes wrong, we can just - pretend it didn’t happen.” 

Dancing in there was obligatory, motivated. In there, she was expected to play nice, expected to be gracious and kind and everything her father brought her up to be. In there, even when she was not in the spotlight, all eyes followed her conspicuously from one partner to the next. Out here, though.

“I’m not particularly good either, really, if you’re wondering,” She shrugged, dress rippling around her knees as she did a little half turn, arms raised. “Besides - waltzes get exhausting after a while. Was kind of hoping to just shimmy a little.”

Even Nathalie had given up on making him dance, which fair play to her, was after years of Patrick stepping onto her toes. He remembered enjoying the dancing when he was still younger, but there was just something about it these days that wasn´t too appealing to him.

Though he had to admit that her smile was making it hard for him to resist. Maybe it was also the glass of whiskey he had downed just a few moments ago. Who knew? He surely didn´t. All he was aware of was that he extended his hand to take hers, letting himself be pulled in.

“Well. Shimmy away then,” He couldn´t help but chuckle. “I´ll...just...follow.” Really, he probably looked ridiculous, but he couldn´t quite bring himself to care just yet.