why are we still here? just to suffer? to live while Achilles and Patroclus do not?

a gender reveal party where they pop the balloon and its full of many smaller balloons, which in turn are full of even smaller balloons, because gender is an eternal mystery and nobody really knows whats going on anymore

hope this isnt too nsfw for you guys but id really like to hold a hand

Uh oh sisters! *cuts the chain holding up the chandelier, sending it careening into the audience*

Fuck all romance except whatever the fuck that lil cowboy and roman guy from night at the museum had going on

reblog if youre an idiot. reblog if youre just a fucking fool.

gonna hop in the nether portal real quick and see what sort of shenanigans i can get myself into this time

since it’s the anniversary of mt. vesuvius’s eruption i’d like to take a moment to mourn the most significant victim of the tragedy, lucius caecilius iucundus’s dog cerberus, qui dominum frustra custodiebat

what if we kissed...... and fell in love....... and had a healthy, fulfilling, long-term relationship...... haha jk jk.......................................................................................................................................................................... unless 👀💋

if I had to use my superhuman music skills to lead my gf out of the underworld, I wouldn't glance back against Hades' orders and cause her to remain trapped

if i ever give birth please dont tell me my baby looks just like me within the first 2 months cause i know that newborn look ugly as shit so unless you tryna square up dont speak