Chicken Parm’s Not Done W/O The Mozzarella

This is one of your worst posts yet man

You called me dirt sucking poor and told me my carrot looks like a cock

I don't have Writer's Block, I have Writer's Sphere, and my friends, that sphere is a cracked out pinball right now.

Actually when I say “fuck all billionaires” I particularly mean Taylor “having my wedding in the middle of the busiest city in the world on the busiest weekend in the world in the part of the city the majority of commuters need to get through because fuck working people” Swift

shoutout to the words "overmorrow" and "ereyesterday". english losing these words was stupid. "the day after tomorrow" "the day before yesterday" clunky-ass constructions. revolting. i'm bringing overmorrow and ereyesterday back in my idiolect and there is nothing you can do about it

people will say “they’re only friends” and then show me two people who would crawl through broken glass to hear the other laugh once. two people who have memorized each other’s coffee orders, fears, childhood stories, and emergency contacts. two people who would haunt each other’s houses as ghosts. be serious.

Just an FYI—the original intention of this post was to challenge the way people say only friends, as though friendship is somehow lesser than other forms of love. As if being deeply known, cherished, and chosen by another person could ever be a small thing. Normalize profound platonic love. Some of the most fulfilling, transformative, and enduring relationships we will ever have are friendships. 🫶🏼

The Adventure Zone: Balance is so weird bcus how do I explain to normal people that one of the most impactful medias to me that I've consumed in the last 10 years for me is a DnD podcast where one of the main characters is an elf twink named 'taco' and the first enemy they face is named Magic Brian, who is also an elf twink with a spider companion named Bryan???

HAPPY FOURTH OF JULY🎆🎇

people aren't even exaggerating indeed is literally like that. walmart attendant $13 an hour, target attendant $13 an hour, AI dick sucker $40 an hour, home depot attendant $13 an hour, guy who designs bullets that can only kill children $160k a year plus benefits, gas station manager $18 an hour

please i need him to die on 4th of july gaudy as fuck 'america 250' celebration that would be the funniest thing ever i wouldn't even bitch about the fireworks. i wouldn't even do that.

Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease, it would be absolutely magnificent, just let it melt him.

I think any time anyone has a migraine $2,000 should be directly deposited in their bank account as compensation

This is an awesome use of what is probably a master's degree if not a doctorate and I am 100% thrilled that she shared it even though it was embarrassing and she squeaked.

Thank you, adorable scientist, for making people's lives better.

As an Australian, THIS WOMAN IS A FUCKING GODSEND.

Californian (sup, fellow desert-havers) i've been using this since i saw it and it works so fucken good dude (i often have to put like 8 dogs in my car, so it's extra important my car isn't attempting to go super-nova when we get in)

all i want for 2026 is that gigantic rancid AI bubble to finally burst in such a catastrophic way that the consequences will be so good and i'll never have to see another AI generated image ever again

Like to charge, reblog to cast.