⛈ 雲 🌨

The moment my brain link two characters together it's done for me, I can't deny it its new dopamine source, but it also have to understand that in some cases it gotta create what it crave as the world may not share its views or the few ppl who might are still hidden from its sight.

Which in here lies the problem: it becomes lazy and refuse to produce anything that isn't perfect. I never search for perfection in other people works and I'm happy with anything the Fandom gifts yet I expect my own work to be perfect or I'll be crucified or something. Maybe the constant criticism that's been raising lately in Fandom spaces about fanfics, arts, cosplays... is what fueling this fear of making mistakes in writing or drawing in me.

Like lately I learned that a lot of ppl will drop a fic the moment they see a dialogue with the - instead of "" marks. And it made me feel like shit, cause the first languages I learned allow the use of any of them sometimes even both together and English was mostly self-taught so I didn't know about the strict difference only lately. But sometimes can't help but wonder if it's really necessary to be so picky when it comes to fanfics? They're free after all so bits of mistakes here and there aren't going to ruin the story unless it's some clear plot holes (even those I can personally tolerate).

(I went and checked some books written in my mother tongue and surprisingly the most used punctuation system is : – and for the 2nd language I learned is – )

To add more to this is I just found out that there's even a difference in the punctuation system between the British English and the American English.. how fun :(

I guess for my mental health I have to avoid TikTok comment section :v

Also the fear of misrepresenting a mental illness for example but if you think about it more, you write based on your or someone you know experience and each one have a different experience so the difference will be felt no matter what, and you cannot write a 100% accurate representation that everyone will be happy with so cut yourself some slack I guess. We can agree on some points but there'll be ones we don't.

Honestly writing about this now made me feel a bit better, even motivated to write some words in my wips.