ideation .

                              she remembered the house being just a house. a shell, rock steady on the outside but empty on the inside. the very first thing they bought was a mattress, one not all too fancy, temporarily to sleep inside whilst the half finished painted walls all throughout the house witnessed the on and off love making of the two for a good two months. she’d shared more than enough swear words for the house not having any furniture, now every time she came home a decent amount left her lips by tripping over too many things in the house. ‘’the fuck is this doing here,’’ said at nothing in particular, a sandal she didn’t recognize in the dark. the hallway’s light was one of the handful of flaws in the house she couldn’t bother to take a look at, so karma bit her in the ass every time she hurt herself physically. nonetheless, she kept her calm. ‘’who else, the boogeyman? i’ll fuck him up if he’s hiding in the closet. or bathroom, behind the curtains, perhaps? men aren’t the smartest after all.’’ she shrugged her jacket off to leave it on the back of the sofa before making her way over to her wife, cold fingers resting in the back of her neck. ‘’oh, such bold words. what if make the decision —‘’ pause for a deep kiss, leaving lips visibly bruised, ‘’— to open all three of them.’’ it wasn’t a question, nor a suggestion. it was happening. ‘’and you can watch.’’ she said all too tempting, see how her wife would react as she didn’t wait another second to make her way over to the kitchen.

needed  somewhere  to  settle  down  and  newton  was  it .     not  once  had  allegra  correlated  HAPPILY  EVER  AFTER  with  texas  in  the  plentiful  years  she  and  leslie  were  on  the  road ,   but  after  visiting  once ,   it  proved  enough  to  be  persuasive   ----   an  environment   that  hardly  ever  sees  snow  really  was  a  perfect  fit .     can  remember ,   quite  fondly ,   all  of  their  firsts  in  this  town :   a  beat - up  ‘98  camaro   (   without  working  air  conditioning   )   and  eventually  their  house .     god ,   how  could  she  forget  the  mattress ?     seemed  ideal  compared  to  the  pathetic  lump  of  foam ,   an  added  bonus  with  their  r.v. ,   that  they’d  grown  accustomed  to .     over  time ,   however ,   the  mattress’  springs  became  much  more  prominent .     ❝   you  never  know .   ❞     while  she  has  yet  to  see  leslie ,   the  familiar  timbre ,   and  slew  of  curse  words ,   tug  lips  into  a  smile .     when  her  wife  comes  into  view ,   allegra  watches  admiringly  and  positions  herself  against  the  counter .     hand  supporting  weight  /  digits  curl  around  the  marble  surface .     ❝   might  have  you  double  check  later ,   to  be  safe .     can’t  have  men  in  our  space .   ❞     as  fingers  linger  on  the  base  of  neck ,   allegra’s  hand  inclines  to  rest  against  hers .     cold  touch  nearly  gives  her  goosebumps .     before  she  can  mutter  some  remark ,   a  sudden  kiss  keeps  her  silenced .     definitely  expecting  more  than  what  she’s  given ,   probably  a  little  eager  as  to  what’ll  unfold  following  dinner .     objects  with  a  sharp  exhale ,   though  she  trails  behind  leslie .     ❝   oh ,   i  can  watch ?   ❞     tongue  dampens  lips .     manages  to  return  back  to  the  unopened  liquor  bottles  to  aid  as  a  distraction  of  sorts ,   you  know ,   to  keep  lingering ,   vulgar  thoughts  at  bay .     ❝   i  bought  you  a  little  something   ...   and  if  you’re  really  good ,   i  might  even let  you  open  it  early .   ❞

had christy finally found his match? a woman who didn’t take his shit, but understood his madness and definitely didn’t question it? it probably wasn’t the best idea to discharge himself, but as brittany leaned over him to press their lips together, his eyes shut for the few seconds they were connected and he knew then that: yeah, brittany was pretty damn close to being his match. opening his eyes as she retreated, he nodded – just a little bit.

feeling as though he might’ve had some new kind of lease of energy, christy grunted as he began to sit up, a sudden thump pounding his temple for a split second. wincing, he began to climb out of the bed, his fingers pinching the catheter to grimace as he pulled it out of himself – something he had done more than a few times… for various reasons.

reaching for his hoodie which was strewn on the opposite chair and splattered with dry blood, the boy ached as he stretched his arms out, pulling the material over his head and fitting it around his beaten torso. “you ready?” he asked, almost sounding breathless as he ran a careless hand through his curls.

whether  she  dare  admit  it  to  herself  or  not ,   there  was  no  denying  that  christy  had  some  kind  of  special  hold  over  her .     it’s  invasive  and  new ,   but  she’s  very  minimal  complaints  thus  far   (   ask  her  in  another  week  or  two   ) .     he  was  the  match  to  her  flame ,   so  as  he  began  disconnecting  various  tubes  and  wires  from  himself ,   all  brittany  could  do  was  observe  admiringly .     no  denying  they  were  cut  from  the  same  cloth ,   would  do  the  exact  same  if  advised .     although   ...   she  can  feel  the  pain  in  his  wince  as  the  catheter  is  removed ,   would  have  offered  some  kind  of  assistance  but  it’s  not  like  she’d  be  much  help .     can  maybe  offer  a  hand  to  keep  christy  from  busting  his  ass ,   but  that’d  be  the  gist  of  it .

can’t  peel  eyes  from  his  beaten - up  torso .     makes  a  mental  note  to  generously  apply  neosporin  to  his  plethora  of  wounds  and  to  conceal  them  with  medical  wrap .     notices  the  blood - stained  hoodie  as  christy  tugs  it  on ,   though  can’t  say  she  hadn’t  observed  how  he’d  wince  in  pain  with  every  inch  of  movement .     ❝   of  course   ----   are  you  sure  that  you  are ?   ❞     knows  what  the  answer  is  going  to  be ,   so  brittany  makes  the  judgment  call  to  make  a  bee - line  for  the  hospital  door .     extends  a  hand  toward  him ,   peering  over  her  shoulder  momentarily .     ❝   we’re  stopping  at  a  gas  station  on  the  way  back  to  my  place .     gonna  need  whatever  over  the  counter  painkillers  i  can  get  my  hands  on .   ❞     guides  christy  into  the  hallway ,   dragging  him  along  the  corridor  and  back  to  the  doors  she’d  come  in  just  minutes  ago .

*   @ridereblogs·   !

she’s been pulling at the brigid’s cross hanging around her NECK on a golden chain for the better part of an hour ; brown gaze glassy, not entirely taking in the crystalline glass of straight whiskey that doesn’t have any ice cubes in it, anymore. sure : she’s sat there on that cracked leather bar stool, physically. but her MIND is a million miles away, or perhaps just a handful - however far she’s gotten from the claustrophobic walls of the county hospital. 

a chair creaks. she blinks a handful of times in quick succession, and suddenly, her vision is cleared. the first thing she really focuses on is that damned glass of rich brown that she could down in one, and she RECOILS from the thought. she uses the back of her hand to push it aside with notable force. “have it, if you want,” her voice is somewhat hoarse, and it isn’t immediately obvious that she’s ADDRESSING her new neighbor - though she glances to them, briefly, “it’s not poisoned. just…- room temp.”

it  takes  brittany  less  than  twenty  minutes  to  get  ready  on  a  bad  day   ----   has  perfected  a  look  that  appears  slept  in .     those  smudged  and  uneven  wings ?     they’ve  seen  some  shit .     can’t  recall  the  last  time  she’d  gone  out  alone ,   it’s  almost  reassuring  to  know  independence  hasn’t  depleted  and  was  instead  placed  on  the  BACK  BURNER ,   though  is  quickly  reminded  why  she  hadn’t  done  this  in  a  while .     now  that  she’s  not  actively  looking  for  someone  to  share  a  bed  with ,   the  fun  aspect  of  a  night  out  has  lost  all  luster .     or  so  she’d  thought .

as  a  drink  of  piss - warm  whiskey  is  guided  across  the  counter ,   with  a  pretty  heavy - handed  nudge ,   she  smiles .     and  it’s  genuine .     diluted   drinks  aren’t  a  personal  favorite ,   is  sure  no  one’s  particularly  fond  of  such  a  thing ,   it  is  free  and  there’s  nothing  better  than  a  free  drink .     from  a  stranger ,   no  less .     ❝   if  i  didn’t  know  any  better ,   i’d  think  you  wanted  to  take  me  home .   ❞     isn’t  serious ,   of  course .     without  a  moment’s  hesitation ,   she  downs  the  remnants  and  purses  lips  when  swallowed .     certainly  too  bland  for  her  liking ,   so  brittany  orders  herself  another  shot  from  the  bartender .     ❝   so ,   what ?     just  get  your  ninety  day  chip ?   ❞

“Couple…hours…maybe I duno,” time all ran together when he wasn’t on call or at the hospital. “This is, fascinating,” the doctor noted, hardly looking over at his companion. When she spoke about various shows just like the one he had on his jaw dropped, “You’re shitting me there’s more than just this one?” He asked brows raised in utter confusion. Had it not been raining cats n dogs Brody probably would’ve spent the day mountain biking or doing some sort of outdoor activity, however…instead on a rare occasion he was homebound.

Eating another almond he held his arm out for her to snuggle in to him as the two watched the show. “Wife swap? Isn’t that illegal?” He asked with a slight laugh, “Mine ended in divorce,” he joked. Though, he hadn’t cheated on his ex he thought the title fitting. “Okay, I need to know about all of these…prestigious tastes you’ve got,” Brody asked handing her the remote. But before she could continue a grimace arose on his visage. “Oh fuck that dress is hideous, why isn’t Randy telling her that’s not the one to say yes to…that’s like..a dumpsterfire of a dress…” 

can’t  keep  herself  from  laughing  at  brody’s  inquiry .     ❝   god ,   there’s  so  many  more  bridal  shows  than  you  can  even  begin  to  imagine .   ❞     he’s  far  more  outdoorsy  than  amira  could  pretend  to  be .     it’s  almost  like  she’s  allergic  to  nature ,   any  outing  that  may  lead  to  a  run - in  with  creepy  crawlies  was  a  definite  no .     can  appreciate  his  presence ,   though ,   especially  on  a  day  in  like  this .     there’s  something  about  him  that  was  altogether  personable .     amira  would  swear  that  she  likes  him  more  and  more  the  longer  they  live  together  and  she  gets  to  understand  how  he’s  wired .

wouldn’t  say  no  to  cuddling  into  him ,   so  she  scoots  closer  until  her  form  is  pressed  against  his .     grabs  a  blanket  from  behind  her ,   lazily  tossing  the  quilt  over  the  two  of  them .     opens  her  mouth  so  he  could  feed  her  an  almond .     seconds  later  and  her  head  is  shaking ,   though  the  smile  on  her  lips  only  grew .     ❝   as  far  as  i  know ,   it  wasn’t  illegal   ...   it  was  on  air  for  views ,   but  it  was  very  sexist .     very  gross  in  that  way ,   but  that’s  2000′s  television  for  ya .   ❞     laughs  at  the  divorce  comment ,   though  she  doesn’t  respond  outright .     ❝   prestigious  tastes  like  mine  range  from  say  yes  to  the  dress  to  my  strange  addiction .     i’ll  watch  anything .   ❞     takes  the  remote  as  gaze  shifts  yet  again  to  focus  on  the  screen .     mouth  falls  agape .     he  wasn’t  wrong .     the  dress  was  horrible .   ❝   he  has  a  business  to  uphold ,   unfortunately .     and  some  people  have  terrible  taste .   ❞

happy to see you.

christy can feel something heavy in his stomach and it was unusual, his eyes softening as he soaked up brittany’s appearance; beautiful, albeit windswept and dusted with dirt from the brawl. naturally, she was just… breathtaking, just as was her soft kiss to his cheek. breathtaking. in return, he felt his cheek burn a gentle pink as he tilted his head into her touch, before his gaze returned to her retreating figure.

“i’m half tempted to discharge myself,” cj admitted quietly, glancing at the door where he’d noticed a pattern of nurses on shifts walking from left to right, busy bodies bustling around the hallways of the different wards. it must’ve been a hard job, he’d thought… maybe not as hard as his, though. eyes returning to fall on brittany, he was almost too quick to mutter, “let me come to yours,” with a look of almost pleading softness on his face. “please,” christy added quietly, almost desperate to feel those soft duvet sheets wrapped around their entangled bodies again.

finds  it  difficult  to  keep  gaze  on  christy .     all  that  mattered ,   for  now  anyway ,   was  that  the  crash  wasn’t  too  bad .     he’s  still  here .     allows  herself  this  moment  to  really  bask  in  a  full  range  of  emotion   ----   whereas ,   in  normal  circumstances ,   she  wouldn’t  be  this  receptive  to  it .     admittedly ,   she  could  use  a  shower .     cheeks  discolored  as  makeup  and  broken  nails  are  ridden  with  dirt .     hair  is  disheveled  and  dry .     notices  a  distinct  change  in  his  skin  tone ,   tinted  cheeks  cause  a  sheepish  grin  to  blossom  on  lips  that  very  desperately  needed  chapstick .     doesn’t  take  her  hands  off  of  him ,   touch  lingers  on  his  chest .

hand  pats  the  spot  it’s  occupying .     ❝   i  wouldn’t  stop  you .   ❞     although  she  knows  it’d  be  ill - advised ,   he’s  able  to  make  his  own  decisions .     and  this  hospital  really  cramps  her  style ,   anyway .     it’s  too  open ,   knows  that  they’d  be  able  to  get  back  to  her  place  without  being  seen  while  it’s  dark ,   but  how  much  longer  do  they  have  to  wait  for  his  discharge ?     when  she  looks  back  to  christy ,   she’d  hum  again .     such  a  pretty  boy .     his  attractive  appearance  almost  causes  physical  pain .     contained  laughter ,   brittany  gives  a  nod  of  acknowledgement .     he  wanted  to  go  back  to  her  place .     no  doubt  could  brittany  play  nurse ,   in  any  way   (   shape  or  form   ) .     couldn’t  stop  herself  if  she  tried ,   brittany  is  just  as  soon  leaning  down  to  christy  as  her  lips  press  against  his .     it’s  short - lived .     appreciative .     ❝   of  course  you  can  come  to  mine .   ❞     dull  whisper ,   forehead  pressed  to  forehead  before  inevitably  pulling  away .   ❝   let’s  get  you  outta  here ,   then .   ❞

it was almost a relief to see the smile cross brittany’s face, hearing the soft giggle leave her lips; he was sure he was a goner, that she didn’t forgive him and wouldn’t for the foreseeable future… but here she was. and to add to the relief, his tired eyes watched as she cupped his large hand within her much smaller ones, fingers nimble as they enveloped his dirty knuckles.

i’m not through with you yet.

the dimple returned to his cheek and his eyes softened as he stared at the blonde. “i’d hope not,” he muttered, voice still weak as he wriggled his fingers within her grasp, as if to let her know he was appreciative of the protective hold. “i’m glad you came, brit,” christy added quietly, cheeks looking as though they were turning pink as he admitted it. “i’ve missed you… thought you’d be too fucked off with me to care,” he finished, mouth twisting with guilt.

while  it  might  have  annoyed  her  to  see  christy  and  fellow  diablos  raid  their  party ,   she  supposes  she  understood  the  irritation  in  their  decision .     may  have  forgiven  him ,   but  the  other  few  wouldn’t  get  awarded  the  same  treatment .     despite  how  she’s  been  guarded  for  years ,   brittany  knew  that  some  sort  of  attachment  developed  toward  the  diablo .     against  her  better  judgement .    in  the  moment ,   hands  remain  cupped  around  larger  ones ,   paying  no  mind  to  the  nurse  still  standing  within  an  arm’s  reach .

gives  a  hum  in  response ,   wanting  nothing  more  than  to  lay  beside  him   ---   gentle  and  lingering  touch  says  what  brittany  couldn’t .     ❝   didn’t  give  me  much  of  a  choice ,   did  ya ?   ❞     words  hold  lack  depth ,   pretty  in  tune  with  emotion  currently .     turns  away  to  wipe  eyes  with  the  back  of  a  hand ,   sighs  deeply  as  she  turns  back  to  face  christy .     ❝   happy  to  see  you .   ❞     in  one  piece .     not  spoken ,   but  it  is  implied .     leans  down  to  the  male’s  level  to  press  a  kiss  against  his  cheek .     ❝   oh ,   i  was  very  mad  at  you .   ❞     but  she  couldn’t  stay  mad  at  him  when  he’s  wired  up  like  this .     not  when  she  felt  he  needed  her .     ❝   i’ve  missed  you  too ,   ❞     looks  at  him ,   giving  a  tight-lipped  smile .     ❝   know  when  you’re  going  to  be  released ?     i  can  take  you  back  to  my  place  ----   or ,   uh ,   if  you’d  prefer  to  go  back  home  instead ,   that’s  fine .     yeah   ...   whatever  you  want  is  fine .   ❞

the beep of the machine beside his bed had become so annoying by now, keeping christy from getting anymore rest now that he’d woken from his slumber. his head was no longer pounding and the withdrawal sweats he’d been severely experiencing on his admit had now relaxed, but he was so dosed up on painkiller, it pretty much felt like another hit – compared to the agony he’d been feeling hours prior, at least. 

besides the soft, muffled chatter of the hospital staff outside his room and in the hallways, there was nothing else to focus on. — until he heard that voice.

hey, tough guy.

slowly turning his head, christy’s eyes fell upon the blonde and, despite everything he felt (or didn’t, more specifically), he managed a soft smile – only enough to pierce one cheek with it’s dimple. though her comment on his appearance might’ve made him chuckle, he hadn’t the energy, so he simply tilted his head towards her, fingers twitching slowly to silently ask for her touch.

“thought i was a goner,” cj finally spoke, his voice a very hoarse whisper as his eyes, now a dull, tired green, peered up at brittany. “that would’ve sucked, wouldn’t it?”

it’s  as  if  the  events  that  unveiled  the  night  previous  were  forgotten   ...   though  ,   in  comparison ,   it  wasn’t  that  big  of  a  deal   ----   already  forgiven  with  the  current  circumstance  being  what  it  is .     can’t  seem  to  peel  her  gaze  away  from  christy ,   curious  eyes  peer  at  the  injuries  he  must’ve  sustained  from  the  accident .     hard  not  to  when  he  looks  this  rough .     pretty  beaten  up ,   curious  to  know  what  exactly  conspired  that  resulted  in  the  both  of  them  being  here ,   in  one  of  many  inpatient  wings  in  the  stratford  clinic .     draws  closer  yet  and  this  time  sits  beside  him .     an  incline  of  the  head  felt  like  a  welcome ,   so  brittany  lifts  her  hand  to  rest  atop  his  before  fingers  curl  around  palm .

won’t  let  go  unless  told  to ,   though  even  then  it  might  be  difficult  to  pry  her  from  his  side .     hates  to  admit  the  severity  this  could’ve  escalated  to ,   so  while  it  pains  her  to  laugh ,   it’s  instinct .     that  would’ve  sucked ,   wouldn’t  it ?     well ,   of  course .     ❝   i’ve  decided  that  you  can’t  just  die  on  me ,   you  got  that ?   ❞     far  from  her  typical  condescending  nature .     lifts  the  hand  in  hers  to  anxiously  bitten  lips ,   leaving  a  kiss  on  the  back  of  his  hand .     brings  it  to  her  chest ,   clasping  one  of  his  hands  in  both  of  hers .     the  gesture  is  mindlessly  protective .     ❝   i’m  not  through  with  you  yet .   ❞

@christcode​

* outgoing ↺ brittany: but i'm okay

* outgoing ↺ brittany: look, i'm sorry, alright? last night i was so coked up i was out of my mind... everyone seemed so up for it, we just.. did it. i'm sorry, okay?

* outgoing ↺ christy 😏 : are you okay ??

* outgoing ↺ christy 😏 : which hospital are you at? what happened ?

* outgoing ↺ christy 😏 , 23 seconds later : christy ?