(っゝω•)っ･✧°✿

Back when I was a redditor (😔) I realized a strange phenomenon. No one cares about your original posts, but if you make the post on another site and screenshot it, people assume it’s a tweet from someone who is known/is funny/etc and the post would do way better

Sober as fuck at the back of the club going onto Wikipedia and typing "List of birds"

Human bodies are so weird like the upper half consists of every single vital organ and the lower half is legs

A wretched little horse is washed away.😈

i wonder what they're gossiping about

i wad in the mario movie but nobody saw me because im good at hiding 🤭

its crazy how pretty much every single thing you can possibly do eithetr feels bad at first and then good or good at first but then bad

I hope my spider fucking book will hold universal appeal

sorry man, i just looked that movie up on doestheantdie.com and...let's just watch something else, ok?

Um actually scrub daddy is my comfort character and it physically and psychically hurts me to see you chop him up and eat him after freezing and cracking him up with liquid nitrogen while naked with big boobs?

Ill be a star