Smurfelina the smurf

I'll say it openly: I LOVE BEANS

I want to be held, even if that means being held at gunpoint at this point

if you change on the inside, you should change on the outside as well. otherwise, how will you recognize that person in the mirror?

does anyone know a cure for being a hoe?

Texting my crush "Hey u up?" at 2 pm

i have consumption. As in, i am slowly being consumed by the media i watch

Not now sweetie, mommy is doomscrolling on linkedin

Game changer's secret finale episode is INSANE! Have y'all watched it yet? Please return upon me with your findings.

I have consumption. As in I am slowly being consumed by my phone.

Marriage is the ultimate commitment to the bit

a liminal space doesn't really have a time zone. it's no time. and all the time. at the same time. just like the north and south pole.

So i'm entering the corporate world and getting a "real job" and stuff. but it's insane... people... trust me??? literal adults let me boss them around?? they trust the judgement of a feral raccoon?? how am i qualified for this??? absolute batshit lmao