out for a dart

the most sexual emotion a man can feel is fear

Now why would Tumblr user twinktorturer say something like this

dip shit you are not turning into the joker. you are barely even turning into the penguin or th e ice guy

a man can be your bitch wife if you’re lucky

#'this is present in the text' is often a good first step #but those second and third ones (naming it; describing its function) are vital (via @elucubrare)

What a cutie patootie. His little plastic suit gives me life.

one of my favorite bits in lord of the rings is something the movies didn't really try to do because it's entirely internal, but sam's carrying the ring and it starts trying to do its work on him, so he's having these intrusive visions of himself marching at the head of a vast and terrible army, and he just starts laughing because, me? samwise gamgee? sam gamgee the general sam gamgee the dark lord are you for real? man i just want to go home and do some gardening. and the ring gets frustrated and it starts trying to figure out other stuff that would actually tempt sam and it's finally like, okay, but hear me out: imagine if you could have...A REALLY REALLY BIG GARDEN