♦.°Killing Gently°.♦ @slaughterlmfao - Tumblr Blog

asked my friend to bite me and he gave my arm the tiniest nibble possible bruh. nobody even wants to cannibalize each other as a form of affection these days

#he promises to kill me every day because were coworkers #and cant even BITE me bro im not asking you to tear me apart #i need a gf at this point

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himynamesisnotemail

im so bad at social cues my boss had to explain to me that my coworker has been flirting with me for at least a year now

#she always refers to him as my boyfriend #turns out she legit thought we were dating.......#god forbid two people match each others ism

had to explain sounding to my coworker who studies psychology today because she genuinely wanted to understand the psychological pattern behind it

#we were both tired as fuck ok #imagine being a bypasser and you hear two people casually discussing sounding

sonnfecikedi

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some drunk dude at the festival: ehh... you a boy or a girl?

me: girl

him: ahh that's good!! we like lesbians here we cherish n protect them fr 💯💯

#he was around 50yo too #an ally in wild #the gaydar skills tho???

#everyone who litters will be stripped of sex and other pleasures for 10 years

letsallhitlinda

why were the interviewers so handsy in this

#i had a stroke watching this

kishibe-rohansbf

date idea: i lay down on ur lap and you pet my head and tell me im not too much

#uhh #its so bad a fucking vocaloid song possessed me and made me draw this #if you can guess which song im yours forever #do yall also get a random skill boost after taking a huge break #also tumblr PLEASEEEE this is a man!!!! male tits!!! pecs even!!#artists on tumblr #digital art #slaughterdraws #illustration

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slaughterlmfao

nvm she died

#now i gotta clean my whole fucking place #and machine wash everything #and carry my other cat to the vet

i have resensitized myself to humor. everything is funny to me

katlovesshrimps

many such cases

save me pesto

if i was straight id be laying SO many manhoes damnnnn

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купите мне чипсы

magicratfingers

some of u will love this

#YESSSSSSS #goddamn #getting this for my male coworker's bday because i hate him #a machine that is also a fleshlight and also an iron maiden

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