So I have been brooding on a headcanon for tf!AJ regarding the song “Over and Over” by Rio Romero.
Every time the song plays I can’t help but imagine that it is playing in AJ’s head from a distant memory. And then I thought about what kind of memory, because cc!Aimsey has literally kept AJ’s backstory as cryptic and unknown as possible. But we DO know is that AJ doesn’t have a mother anymore. So I started my theorizing there.
( This will all be speculation as I don’t know any of AJ’s backstory regarding family and family relationships, even as an Aimsey main )
I like to imagine that the song playing every time AJ’s lets her self destructive tendencies affect her relationships, comes from her mother.
AJ’s mother would of been a loving woman and sung AJ a same lullaby when she was young every night: Over and Over. But the song was sweet, gentle, and it didnt say “f^ck myself over” when her mother sung it. It would go something like this:
Over and over, I’ll love you all over
Etc etc (im not gonna rewrite the whole song ;-;)
It would have symbolized AJ’s strong and steady relationship with her mother. AJ’s mother would teach young AJ to always love true and fierce. But when her mother left her life (whether it be of death or leaving) the song became only a memory of those times.
And over time, AJ began forgetting her mom’s voice. The pitch became lower (to what we know now) and the more AJ’s life got harder and she became more self destructive in her relationships, the lyrics began changing in her head, becoming more distorted, full of self blame. The outcome is the song as we as an audience hear every time AJ messes up a relationship with another person.
And dare I say that AJ still believes its her mother still singing, disappointed in what AJ has become despite the teachings of loving true and fierce. This song became a reminder to the once and maybe only healthy relationship AJ ever had, and how she might never find that again.
So this horrific song was once a sweet lullaby, sung by her mother when AJ was young, but over time got distorted into what we know and hear now because AJ forgot her mother’s voice and how the lullaby went and has subconsciously been changing it to fit her life.
Thank you for hearing me out, im gonna cry in a corner now.
izzy806
kianamaiart
pixelskylines
