SLAYER. STRONG.

PINNED POST. well hello and welcome to my dana winters the vampire slayer roleplay blog from the buffyverse, very headcanon based. STABLISHED 26.02.2021.  MY NAME IS CLAUDIA, you can call me clau, calu, mama, i don’t know. SHE/HER PRONOUNS. i’m latina, from uruguay so english isn’t my first language, bare with me. Find me on discord since I account jump a lot at mamabear#6315 .

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              There had been a reason for her coming back to LA, but maybe it hadn’t been the only one. She felt more like she had purpose here than she did being Buffy’s side-kick and the example slayer of what the new generation shouldn’t be. So when she caught wind of another slayer being right there under Angel’s protection and watch, the elder slayer felt like it was a sign. Of course she got herself filled in on why Dana was there and what her story was and the more she learned about the girl, Faith felt even more compelled to remain there.

Being led to where the other was being residing, the brunette waited outside until Dana gave her permission to come in. Just the sight of her was different from what Angel told her, thankful that progress was being made. Arching a brow at her question, she chuckled and nodded as she moved to take a seat, giving them plenty of space between each other. “Spike, he’s good. Got his hands reattached an’ everything,” she mused with a small smile, “he’s tough, he’ll be okay.” Spike had bagged himself two slayers in his almost two hundred years of existing and he’d done a lot of damage to go with it. So she couldn’t and didn’t blame the girl for going after him.

“Are you okay?” Faith asked after a moment of silence, hands resting in her lap. She wanted the other to know she was safe, that no one was going to come drag her off to the mothership. The new watchers council was still being formed as Giles did his best to recruit and track down former watchers. So she herself knew that it wasn’t in the best interest of Dana to send her back because they wouldn’t be able to help her. “I’m Faith by the way…” she added, watching the other closely.

“Spike.“ She repeats, weird name, but she been studying, names and vampires, they seem to choose them themselves. Dana’s mind flashes to the slayers of the past and she finds the reason why of his nickname. “He is. . .bad.” But the frown on her forehead shows that she isn’t sure her assessment of him was the real one. Perhaps she is still rallying down to her own memories, flooding in, mixing reality with the past of others.

Hands fiddle with one another, she had been drawing, writing, Angel had told her it would do her good to organize her thoughts, so she did just that. The question makes her snap her head back up, she keeps on frowning. A part of her would laugh, bitterly and just point at herself, do I look okay? But she doesn’t. It’s by lookin’ at the slayer before her (Faith, she finds it hilarious too. Faith, Angel, Spike. . .all silly names). “Five by Five.” And the words come to her as she stares at Faith. Not her words, no, but maybe something the other slayer had said before. “Sorry.” And she looks away toward the window by the side. She had been told, she could freak people out.

DANA IS A SLAYER NOW. much like drusilla, who she was parallels from, it wasn’t her choice. buffy had good intentions when she made every potential into a slayer, but she still basically robbed each one of those girls the ability to choose if they wanted it. Dana was one of those girls. And by becoming a Slayer, she might had made Dana’s own condition and trauma even worse in the process. Sure, Dana became stronger now, but the line between reality, vision and dreams became blurred, to the point she didn’t knew what was real or not. Dana had the visions and dreams of past slayers into her brain to the point she thought they were hers, she attacked Spike because she saw him as Warren, the man who kidnapped and torture her, and then, when she broke away from that illusion, she saw him as the vampire/demon who killed her past selves.

He bites his lip at the recrimination. He doesn’t want to hurt anyone ever again and reflexively he wants to deny that he could be, defend himself against it. But he doesn’t, he lets it stand because they ARE hurting her to some extent with all this, just not physically. He was party to her enslayering and he’s the one who ordered her removed from Los Angeles. Her getting better ( or well, sorta okayish ) in on HIM. “ I know Dana. This isn’t what you want and I’m sorry for that but leaving you there was too dangerous for the moment— I mean, you kinda cut off my best friend’s hands and there’s a super evil law firm set up practically down the block from your old institution. You also kinda… killed an orderly there and couple other people so… it would’ve been kinda awkward to recommit you there. ”

He’s rambling and he knows it but the nerves are KINDA HUGE even as he takes a seat in one of the dinky little hospital chairs, lowering your stance is supposed to make you look more friendly or something right ? “ You’re strong, really really strong. I think you’ve kinda figured that out by know and really dangerous. I think you figured that out too. I don’t think you’re a bad person and I don’t think you wanna hurt anyone— not really, you know ? Right now, we’re the best equipped to help you out but I DO hope that one day and hopefully soon you can do where you want to go and do what you want to do when you want to. But right now… you’re well… super unstable and super strong and that gets lots of people hurt. ”

“Best. . .friend.“ Eyes narrow at the idea. It blends with the description given, the hands she had cut where not from a friendly face. A demon with a charming smile and strong hands. Evil hands, so much evil things done, she had to remove it. cut cut cut, until nothing remains, she would’ve keep cutting, if she had not been removed. “Friend. . .he killed me.” A pause, as she rethinks her words. “Others like me. I felt them.” Praying to their mothers, their families, and the blond demon killed them with a gleeful smile and wicked song every time. “You call him friend.” Accusations hide under her words as she shifts her weight in the bed, inching closer.

It reminds her of the psychiatric hospital. Too white, too pearly, all lies, walls that hide screams. She practically snarls back at all the equipment she sees. “I hurt them, they hurt me first.”  Words are finding their way toward her, doing the best she can to make herself understood. Mind is clearer than it had been before. “You fear me.” But her words hide a question under them. She is strong now. Stronger she ever been. No one could hurt her again, she has the upper hand. “What you want?” Because even her doctors had wanted something from her the moment the lights turned off. 

​THE OTHER’S PRESENCE IS FELT FIRST. Dana cannot explain it properly, she understands so much about it and yet, so little. Slayers, both of them, she recalls some of the past slayers in her dreams, her nightmares. Faith’s aren’t ones she remembers, and if she did, a part of her told her she would wish to forget them if given the chance. She is in a room. Her drawings had ceased weeks ago, the wolf, ram and hart might be evil but she feels herself having progress in a way that she never had in the institution and she wonders, if they were messing with her brain. If this is what messing felt like, she prefers it over the nightmares forced on her. Dark eyes look at the entrance of the room and at the experienced slayer.