Adoro.

this fucking video has two punchlines it's incredible

Welcome to my escape room. *places an affectionate cat on your lap*

Why are there like 5 daily chores where if you skip them for 2 days your life becomes a time based psychological thriller after

mom, dad… i’m…. RANDOM!! LOL XD

The bible said Adam and Eve not Adam and TACO PANCAKES!!!!!!!!!!!!! xDD

Both of these accounts still exist. I hope they see us peering into the corpse of their former selves.

sorry to burst everyone’s bubble, but this is from 2013, which means they were satirizing the very cringe you are projecting on them

what if the tyrant of the universe had a tumblr. what if she had an immaculate aesthetic and more followers than you

what if the tyrant of the universe was still blogging like it was 2015 and it looped back around to being simultaneously impressive and endearing

what if the tyrant of the universe posted pics of her bedroom at the top of the awful tower from which she exercised her dread will and it was full of posters of movies from the 80s and 90s and a huge bed covered in pokemon and mlp plushies and lava lamps and string lights and everyone saw this and knew that they were nothing in the face of her wrath

(parent feeding a baby in the 1800s before airplanes were invented) here comes the nothing

there’s something very beautiful about being able to try again tomorrow

I have been trying tomorrow for the past 3 years

and you still have tomorrow to try again