eliza

In the morning, you would greet him with the biggest smile you could muster. He would greet you back with the same gentle smile everyday. At this point, you knew what his real smile looked like. You don’t recall when the last time he’s ever given you one.

If Miss Ayaka and Thoma were busy, and you dined alone with your husband, the table would be silent. You didn’t know what to say, and he’d also be reading over papers while eating, so you were afraid to disturb him. If the two were present, or if there were any other guests, Ayato would be more active in the conversation, joking lightheartedly and appearing like he was actually enjoying himself.

This man did not treat you unkindly despite having these feelings that lurked in your chest. In fact, it was the opposite. He was a true gentleman every time you interacted with him. He would open the door for you while you two walked together. He would pull out the chair when you wanted to sit. He would hold your hand and escort you to any event, or if you were getting on/off a carriage.

But it was all superficial. It felt like he was forcing himself to do these actions for you. You couldn’t even tell what his intentions are for doing so. You couldn’t tell if he just disliked you, disliked this arranged marriage, or if he just wanted people to see what a loving husband he was, that everything was okay right now even though it really wasn’t.

From touchless nights to meaningless small talk, your heart ached at the thought of everything. You don’t ever recall the last time he’s kissed you on the lips in private. You don’t recall the last time he’s ever opened up to you about the depths of his heart, from the things that scared him the most, to the things that has made him truly happy.

And while you know that a relationship thrives off of communication, you couldn’t help but feel scared. You were scared that the man in front of you would grow even colder, shutting off the depths of his heart forever, pushing you away if you were to ever confront him. Maybe he’d even take it to an extreme and call off the marriage with you, telling you that he never loved you, as this was really only an arrangement between your two families. Maybe he was in love with someone else prior to this marriage, and he has only reserved his heart for them all of these years.

You have seen his darker sides. He doesn’t think that anyone has noticed, but you have. You were always watching him, after all.

A more mischievous side of him existed deep down in there, a certain sly foxiness that could even rival Guuji Yae herself. Sometimes, it would scare you to see that forced smile on his face as if what lingered in his mind were true thoughts darker than what he had initially led on.

But despite his flaws, despite the mask he constantly wore around, you loved him. You loved him so much it hurt. You loved how he cared for people despite them being complete strangers to him. You loved his gentle smile as he holds your hand so tenderly when you accidentally trip. How could a man be so kind, yet so cruel to your heart?

And even as you laid in bed most nights alone, shedding tears as if you were the dark side of the crystal moon longing for the light of the sun, you still loved him regardless.

You were in your futon all alone as of this moment, staring at the ceiling. The room was pitch black and silent, other than the occasional sounds of the residual droplets from the passing rain. Ayato would never let you rest in a room that was cold, so the temperature was heated comfortably, yet you couldn’t help but bundle yourself up under the covers even more.

It was cold without him. You didn’t even realize when the last time he had actually went to bed in this room you both allegedly shared.

But it didn’t matter anyways because his futon laid far away from yours.

Your own husband wouldn’t even come near you when you’re together in the same room. You didn’t know if he just wanted to be respectful as a formality between husband and wife, or if he is repulsed by being in the same vicinity as you, but it hurt regardless.

You sighed as you covered your face with the blanket, trying to get rid of these harboring thoughts. It was no use, no matter what you did, you couldn’t stop thinking about your relationship with him every single night. He is what plagues your mind at night, like a thorn lodged deep in a fingertip. It was only soon that will you be bleeding out your love for him.

How could you make a scene about all of this anyways? You've seen how hard he works. You knew that everything he does, it was for the sake of protecting his family and home. Who were you to complain about how busy he was? That was another reason why you continued to keep silent. You thought that your worries meant nothing compared to his own.

Your mind was racing a mile per minute, and you knew you weren't able to get any sleep like this. You get up and out of your futon as you decide to go for a stroll around the estate. The guards protected the outside and prevented from anybody from coming in. As long as you walked around inside, there should be no problem with you strolling the corridors, so long as you remained quiet.

Lighting up a candle, you started meandering through the halls, your footsteps nearly silent with no goal or destination in mind. You didn't even realize your feet had automatically taken you to the doors of his office, the same door that you have stared at many times, knowing that your husband was in there, but you had no reason or courage to open. You see the dimly lit light through the translucent paper sheets, and you knew that tonight was going to be another long night with no rest for him.

You sighed, not remembering the last time you had been in his office, and you were about to step away, but the door suddenly slides open rather violently. You flinch in shock because you didn’t expect for anything to happen, as he usually never notices you there.

"Who is there?" He said in a serious tone, and you were finally greeted by the man who plagued your every thought and dreams. His hand laid on the hilt of his sword, almost as if was ready to strike down any intruder who was lurking in the shadows. But instead of drawing his sword, he blinked a few times, realizing it was just you who stood there. He instantly let go of the sword and his expression relaxed a bit, although his eyebrows were furrowed slightly to show confusion. "Y/n? What are you doing here? It is almost 2am right now."

His presence stunned you for a second before you snapped out of the current awe-struck daze you were in. It had been quite a while since you've seen his face. He was rarely home anymore, but when he was, he would be holed up in his office. You only ever see him to greet him when he returned back home, and sometimes when he leaves, as he had a habit of sneaking out secretly every so often.

"Oh." You were flustered at this unexpected situation. "I had trouble sleeping, so I decided to go for a walk..."

"Is something troubling you?" He asked in concern. "If it is work-related with the household, then I know Ayaka would be happy to give you a hand.”

"It's not that..." You shook your head. You didn't want him to worry about you, so you tell him a small lie. "It's just one of those nights..."

"I see."

"Have you been faring well?" You then asked him.

He gave you a small, gentle smile, but you have seen this many times. It was one of the masks he wore when he wasn’t telling the truth.

"I've been doing alright," he replied. Anybody would've believed him, as he would never appear disheveled in front of anybody, but from the way his eyes had a slight dark tint underneath them and the mess that apparently was his desk with papers and pens strewn everywhere, you knew that he was far from so. "I was actually looking to take a break soon from my paperwork. Since you probably will be up for a little bit, would you care to join me?"

An invitation from him was rare, and you immediately jumped ship. You nodded. "Let me go prepare some tea."

"Oh, there's no need to do that."

"Nonsense," you gave him a reassuring smile, knowing what he was going to say. He was so considerate as always, not wanting to trouble you. "It will only be a few.”

You start to walk down the hall to head to the kitchen, but you were surprised to hear footsteps behind you. Before you knew it, Ayato was walking beside you, and you could hear your heart thumping in your chest.

"Ayato?" You questioned.

It was dim, as the candle was the only thing that lit the dark halls, so you can barely make out his expression.

"I'll tag along with you then." He said softly, as to not wake anybody else up. "It will be a good change of pace from being stuck in my office all night."

To you, he was so hard to read at times. If he was accompanying you, he surely must have his reasons, as he had never used any of his personal time on you before. He only accompanied you outside when he had a special meeting at an event that required for both spouses to arrive. Those were the only times when he was somewhat affectionate. That was why you were nervous when he decided to come along with you, thinking he had an ulterior motive like he usual does. But a small, small part of you hoped that it was something else; that he wanted to join you because he missed you and wanted to just idly chat.

You stepped into the kitchen and then lit a brighter lantern to illuminate the room using your own candle. But before you could do anything else, you see Ayato's hand push a portion of your hair aside. You couldn't help but feel your cheeks heat up at the action, your eyes making its way towards him now that you were able to see his face.

He wore a gentle smile on his face as he looked down at you tenderly. A rare expression indeed, you’ve only noted him to give this look to Ayaka. It made your heart hurt a little as it thumped away in your chest, feeling like you could soar to the moon and never come back.

"Your hair was getting close to the flames, so I didn't want it to burn,” he explained.

"Oh..." You didn't know what else you could say. "Thank you..."

With that, you started boiling the kettle of water, your body moving to find tea leaves. Ayato watches on without speaking a word, and you two drift into a somewhat lulling silence.

As you prepare your leaves, Ayato interrupts the silence no sooner than later.

“There’s another event that the Kanjou Commission is hosting,” he replied. There it was. He needed you to attend another political event with him. You were once so naive to think that he would actually spend time with you just because he wanted to. You knew he hated small talk and would rather get straight to the point, in which he did just do so. “I was hoping you wouldn’t mind attending it with me.”

Of course you didn’t mind, if it meant that you would be spending more time with him. But even if you did expect for this, you were still disappointed.

“Sure. When will it be?”

“In two months. They’re hosting a party event to discuss upcoming financial plans for the winter.”

You nodded, your hands a little rougher than usual as you crushed up the dried tea leaves in the mortar. Usually you would hide your emotions well, but it definitely showed in the way you pounded at the leaves.

If Ayato had noticed your switch in moods, he didn’t say anything. Instead, he went over to the cabinet to grab two cups for the tea.

“I appreciate it. Let me know if there’s anything else I can do for you.”

Another blatant lie fueled only by courtesy. He always says this whenever you did a favor for him. If you were to truly ask for a favor, he would have Thoma somehow fulfill it, or he would say that he was too busy to do it himself, and that he would make it up later. He would send a gift, picked out by either Thoma or Ayaka of course, to later apologize for not fulfilling your promise.

And although it has only happened four or five times before you’d stop asking him for favors, knowing that he was too busy to fulfill them, it still left a bitter feeling within you.

You felt that it was selfish for you to feel this way. You knew that he had lost his parents at a young age, having to resume the role as the leader of the Yashiro Commission and head of the Kamisato Clan very early in life. You thought it wasn’t right for you to feel bitter about small things like this. Yet, as you glanced at the man in front of you, who barely looked at you and instead stared at the bright full moon outside, your heart ached at this solemn expression— one that loomed with fatigue and tiredness.

Maybe what you truly longed for was his happiness. Maybe you wanted to share that happiness with him, although you knew it would be a long shot. So long as he was the head of the Yashiro Commission, the leader of the Shuumatsuban, there will always be a distance between you two, as he prioritized things differently from any other typical person. Even though he was in the same room as you right now, as the moon peaked through the small window, the cicadas singing in the distance, he still looked as alone as ever. Like there was an unmeasurable length between you two, and you were too afraid to cross it, in fear that you would never be able to reach him.

The kettle soon starts to heat up, and you take it off the flame to start steeping the tea leaves. A few minutes of silence passed, and you wondered if he was going to leave immediately after he finished his tea. It was still hot, so you did have a couple more minutes left with him, right?

You poured the tea carefully in the cup and then proceeded to hand it over to him.

“It’s hot, so be careful.”

“Thank you,” he smiled at you and graciously accepted the tea. He picks it up to his lips, blowing it a few times as he inhaled the scent. “This smells like a different type of tea than the one you served at the event the other day.”

You remembered that event. You were attending a birthday party for an old couple who were close friends with the Kamisato’s. You brewed that tea with extra care, knowing that Ayato was going to drink it on that very occasion.

“It was truly delicious,” he complimented and you felt your heart soar at his words once more. “I know I never said this, but it was one of my favorite hot teas.”

“I’m glad to hear that,” I smiled, making note to remember that information. “This one that I brewed helps with stress and calms the mind.”

He took a sip once the tea is cooled down a bit more. “I can see how this one can have that effect. It’s a very mild, but calming flavor. It’s a good choice for you to brew this, since it will probably help you sleep.”

Actually, you had brewed it for him, so that he wouldn’t stress so much, but you held your tongue back. Instead, you took a sip of the hot tea, trying to match his pace so that you both could finish at the same time.

“I hope you like it,” you instead said.

“I do enjoy it quite a bit,” he replied with a small smile on his face. “I will take it to my office and savor it. I appreciate you willing to spend time with me.”

“It’s my pleasure.”

“I hope you get some sleep soon, and try not to stay awake for too long,” your husband states. “Please pardon me, I must return to my work.”

You forced out a smile in return, knowing he had cut his time off with you short on purpose.

“Have a good night, Ayato.”

He gave a small nod as he walked out with the tea in his hand. You wait for the door to fully shut before you leaned on the counter with your back.

He didn't even wait to finish the tea before he left. He just went straight to the point.

Your hands gripped the ceramic tea cup tightly. It felt like if you had held it tight enough, it would shatter and break, scalding your skin like the way your husband did just now.

Your tears dripped into the tea, the salty solution messing with the delicate taste of the drink as you sipped it, not wanting to waste it. What was once a calming, smooth taste was now bitter.

So, so bitter.

It was another cruel, lonely night that awaited you.

Let me know if you want a part 2 and I will be happy to write one!

DESCRIPTION. A businessman was found dead in his hotel room on ▇▇▇▇ at ▇▇▇▇. This was thought to be the work of a human serial killer, until police reports noticed the disappearance of the man's heart. This murder has been connected to 27 similar incidents over the course of ▇▇▇▇ months.

Over these past few years, you have heard many stories about the corporate entity Raiden Ei.

A once-in-a generation genius, some would say. Others, however, may name her a corrupt face of an even more corrupt company—but that was neither here nor there. You didn't care about her reputation, or the words some jealous business rivals would sneer behind her back.

But you do care about one thing, and that is the murders taking place around the Inazuma City area. The area she calls home. These murders were gruesome, terrible things that on-scene police needed therapy to digest.

"This is the work of a monster," one officer tells you, his eyes far away and haunting. You nod, scribble down some nonsense in your notepad, and move on to observe the photographs taken at the scene. M.U.S.E higher ups had landed you an undercover position as a detective, and it sure as hell made your life easier. You're sure that if these Inazuman police caught a glimpse of the M.U.S.E insignia on your identification, they would be more of a hindrance than a help.

You can't help but make connections in your head as you flip through the photographs. Of course the creature would reside in a location where there's animosity between the police and M.U.S.E. After all, wouldn't it try anything to impede the investigation?

And perhaps it's working, because the investigation isn't going so well as is, you think solemnly, trying to rub your growing headache away. What were they thinking, assigning you to this case without anyone to help? This creature was an eight out of ten in severity for god's sake...

You take a file containing copies of the evidence and excuse yourself from the hotel, avoiding conversation with as many officers as you can. Your walk through the eerily quiet hotel lobby was silent, and you thought over Diluc's words to you before you left.

"Don't rely too much on this ID, they'll notice you aren't actually in their department if you stay for too long." He had said, and then promptly ignored the undignified scoff you let out in response. As if one visit to the crime scene would help you all that much.

You sigh in frustration once you're out of earshot, far down the winding paths of Inazuma City's renowned Commercial Street. People are laughing, cheering, yelling out about their stand's low prices. You even catch sight of two children with their mother, carrying sparklers and giggling amongst themselves, even as their mother attempts to reign them in.

Everyone was unaware. Completely blind to the idea of the monster laying in wait and possibly preparing it's next murder.

Of course it's possible that this is no monster at all. You entertained the idea at first. The wounds on the victims were horrifying of course, but nothing explicitly pointed to supernatural causes.

Not until the death of the twenty-seventh victim, the one who's corpse is shown in the photographs you have just observed. Instead of the usual method of bodily mutilation, wherein the abdominal and thoracic cavities were merely cut into and seemingly observed—this time was much different.

Inside the victim's thoracic cavity was hollow, and his heart was missing from its place.

What reason would a human serial killer have to take a man's unbeating heart? Was it meant as a sick trophy, perhaps? There was no shortage of sick people who would do such a thing. Even so, possibly... it is something darker in nature. Something inhuman.

No one at M.U.S.E could even give you a solid guess of what creature could have the means of doing this. Your mind jumped between possibilities, but nothing led to solid ideas.

Your feet clashed against the slightly rain-soaked stone paths, steadily growing rougher and rougher as your annoyance at the situation grew. You had help getting started in the investigation, sure, but what were you to do now? You resigned yourself to another night of reviewing case files and autopsies, before you were stopped in your tracks.

It was nothing, really, a simple billboard was all it was. They weren't so common in Inazuma City, but it seems they made space for the ever-growing business mogol Raiden Ei. Her long, purple hair was hanging loose down her back, and she looked like the very portrait of elegance. Her eyes lacked any semblance of shine, and her god-like features only proved to heighten her image as an inhuman CEO—willing to do anything for a good profit.

That same recognizable purple hair had been caught on surveillance cameras in the hotel lobby that afternoon. She was your only lead, no matter how badly you wished that wasn't the case.

You suck in a resigned breath as you stare at her image, before turning on your heels. Towards the direction of her damned offices. You hadn't thought that you would do this tonight.

But if you didn't, you weren't sure you would be able to sleep through the night. The haunting faces corpses have never been pleasant to see in your dreams.

Your hands curled around her hair, brushing and smoothing out the knots and twists that built up over the course of the day. She sat on the floor while you sat in her desk chair, giving you a better angle to comb her hair to your heart's content.

On her laptop screen were notes for her upcoming exam, and you would be lying if you said you understood any of it. Your hands stilled slightly as you thought of her. She was always working so hard, she wanted nothing more than to be a successful entrepreneur.

And yet all you can do to comfort her is play with her hair? Could you do nothing to smooth the stress induced wrinkles which grew on her face? Could you do nothing about her appetite, or the way she didn't come to bed most nights; too busy studying?

Could you truly do nothing? Were you good enough for her?

"You are thinking too loudly, again," she said suddenly, turned to rest her chin on your knee, her gaze thoughtful as she looked up at you. "What's wrong? Are your arms getting tired?"

"I'm fine, sorry for worrying you," you chuckle, metaphorically waving her concern away as you brush her purple fringe from her eyes. She leans into your touch, like she was a cat craving attention.

And you didn't talk about it. Later on, in the future, you would wonder about what would have happened to you both if you did.

Would she still find herself in your arms, some nights? With you brushing her hair and holding her gently? Or was this relationship doomed to end, no matter what you did?

The questions kept you awake far more often than any corpse ever had.

Your first plan was admittedly... optimistic.

You walked right up to the frankly ridiculously fancy front desk, where a bored girl sat filing papers. She looked as if she would rather be anywhere but here on a friday night. And she really looked like she would rather eat the file in her hands than talk to you. Your smile is sympathetic as you approach her.

"Good evening ma'am, I'm here to ask Raiden Ei some questions pertaining to the recent killings on Commercial Street," Before speaking you hold up your M.U.S.E ID, trying not to wilt at the unimpressed look in her eyes. Internally, you fought with yourself over whether or not you should show her your M.U.S.E ID or your fake police badge, but eventually you settled on telling the truth, lest she question you more and you cannot come with answers.

"Raiden-san will not be seeing anyone this evening," her voice is calm until she speaks again, tired eyes sharp and utterly absent of fear. What a terrifying receptionist! "Unless you have a warrant out for her arrest?"

Ah, well, it was stupid of you to think you could ever take the easy way out.

"No, I do not have a warrant, but please let her know that should she not cooperate with the police and their investigation, it will not look good for her." After your little tirade, you sigh outwardly. The bags resting under your eyes feel heavier than ever. "Now, do you think you can point me towards the public restroom?"

Without another word, the receptionist points you to a corridor on the left side of the lobby, likely leading to a restroom for non-employees. As you walk, you take a glance at the watch on your wrist. Ten o'clock on the dot.

Some cleaning staff are working away when you get to the restroom, and you don't think twice before discreetly snatching the ID hanging off one of them while their attention is elsewhere. You walk with purpose and confidence through the restroom, washing your hands under the guise of wanting to look presentable before heading up to meet with the CEO. You dry your hands quickly before exiting the restroom, heading straight to the elevator further down the corridor.

Thankfully, the building seems quiet at this time. You swipe the card against the reader and enter the elevator, hitting the number of the floor you know she's in. She must have gotten sloppy in her old age, you think with a dry sense of humor. You only needed to ask a few informants to understand the inner workings of the building.

The elevator dings softly, the doors opening to reveal a hallway straight out of an expensive movie set. You sigh, taking in the beautiful architecture. She's always had an eye for the extravagant. A large modern window along one of the walls shows the city down below, bright and awake even at the later hour. Inazuma City never seems to sleep.

Your outfit speaks business and your steps are sure, and so none of the sparse employees seem to feel the need to address you. When you reach the end of the long straight hallway—you finally see the door. Her door, and the strangeness of the situation almost causes you to falter when your hand touches the handle. You stop, and you feel your stomach churn; but with what? Sadness? Are you still not over this childishness, even years later?

You wouldn't allow your feelings to take ahold of you. You wouldn't.

Almost like you're trying to prove something to yourself, you slam the door open, fingers shaking embarrassingly as you stare her down. You enter, those stupidly large doors closing right behind you. The silence is deafening, her eyes take forever to meet your own, and you're struck with how different she is.

It's not in an easily seen way, but you notice. You see how her hair is in a ponytail instead of braided, how her lips are straight instead of perpetually curved downwards, how her eyes betray nothing of what she feels.

"Ei," you call to her, trying desperately to keep your composure as you walk towards her desk, "I'm... sorry for the intrusion. I wanted to ask you a few questions."

She tilts her head slightly. "I thought I told my receptionist not to let anyone up."

Nothing important to say? Really? With that you throw the stolen janitor's ID on her desk, and the clatter is loud in the otherwise quiet room, although it doesn't seem to alert Ei at all.

"Your employees should work at keeping their IDs from being stolen." You're trying so hard to not sound upset, to sound indifferent to her emotionless face and ringless finger. She says nothing in response, so you open the folder you've been holding in your hands, taking out a picture and placing it down right in front of her. "You checked in at the Aisa bathhouse and inn at six pm on September 19th, and checked out that morning at six am. Do you know what happened in room 106 that night?"

"I cannot say I recall," her voice is almost robotic as she speaks, not even bothering to look at the photo you placed down. You grit your teeth, placing both hands on her desk, leaning down to look her in her eyes.

"A man was murdered, his heart ripped from his body."

She looks bored, bored at the idea of a man being murdered. "Make your point, before I call security to escort you off the premises."

Before you even realize what your own body is doing, you've vaulted over the desk, backing her chair almost to the window behind her as you grasp her collar in both hands. She doesn't choke, she doesn't look scared at all. She never acted this emotionless back then. There's no way the years can change a woman this much. What is wrong with her—

"Are you human?" You ask brazenly, scared of how she could answer. She could push you away if she wanted to. Perhaps she could even claw your heart out before you realized what was happening. You were strong, and could fight off humans and most creatures due to your training, but it has killed so many people at this point. Surely it has power beyond your own.

"Who is to say," she says, and for once you can sense something bubbling up in her as she smirks at you, "are you asking for proof?"

Without warning, her deft hands reach to grab one of your own, almost knocking you off balance with the unexpectedness of the action. Your breath hitches, and your eyes widen as you watch her raise your hand up, to rest against where her pulse should be at her neck.

Nothing.

"Why..." you're at a loss for words, standing in Raiden Ei's office with your hand at her neck. Her face is blank, calculating, every bit of the heartless businesswoman stereotype, and it is driving you mad. Why would you prove your lack of humanity to me? Was it all this time…

"My heart pumps no blood. I am not human. Even so, does that give you a right to kill me?"

"I would be ridding the earth of a murderer," your words come breathless and stagnated. Her hands are so cold… were they always so cold? "I would be doing everyone a favor."

She tilts her head again, and your heart is racing, the weight of it heavy and oppressing in your chest. “Murderer?”

"Are you playing dumb?"

"I do not recall being on trial for murder," she says thoughtfully, grip loosening as she finally releases your hand. You back away, hips hitting the edge of her desk. You're offered only a few short seconds of respite before she stands herself, backing you against the desk. She's so close, and your eyes widen when she opens her mouth to speak. You can't hear her breathe, even with how close she is. "And I would rather not be condemned to death by a woman I do not even know."

A shocked, quick breath escapes you, and with lightning speed you grip her shoulders, trying to push her away. "You're... not Ei--"

It's quick. If nothing else, the way her inhumanly sharp hand pierces through your chest is quick. In your years of working with M.U.S.E, you can't remember a time where your life has genuinely flashed before your eyes. Not until now.

You're looking into her eyes as she's killing you, and weakly, pathetically, your hands reach up to grip her hair. Blood is dripping onto the floor of her office. You can't breathe, and it hurts. It hurts so badly you can't even think beyond seeking the comfort of her hair which you had loved so much back then.

Her hair is the same, her eyes are the same, this... this thing is parading around wearing her face and speaking in her voice, and you're powerless to stop it. You're dying, and the beating of your heart stops in its tracks as she grips it with her fingers; crushing it into nothing.