semper fidelis;

He’s got higher standards than that.

Oh please. I'm the best thing that's happened to you and him.

You could flirt with Lion.

What if he ends up falling in love with me?

Is the rent cheap?

I do not want those images in my mind.

I have nobody to flirt with besides you and Dumbledore, since Lily is out of the question. So get used to it.

Merlin, don’t’ ever say that again.

You don't like the title Mistress Sirius? I think it's fitting.

No, the birthday was full of all good things, believe me.

Okay, good. Mistress Sirius won't need to take over, then.

What, did she do something scary to you on your birthday? Toys?

I've faced psychotic Death Eaters, I can face the ginger.

Are you nice any other time?

Um, yeah. I haven't kicked your cat in a while.

Well that’s not very nice.

No such thing as nice on April Fools.

I was planning on having a rain cloud follow you around in honor of April Fools', but I guess England already did that for me.

I need my mistresses to cook, okay?

Do you have a food fetish or something? Weirdo.

But can you cook as well as Lily is the question?

A mistress doesn't need to cook, you dolt.