Guy just walked in with a shirt that said “I don’t question my wife’s choices because I’m one of them” and frankly I’m obsessed
Cosimo Galluzzi
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#extradirty
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@sinrosalind
Guy just walked in with a shirt that said “I don’t question my wife’s choices because I’m one of them” and frankly I’m obsessed

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We all like to think we can handle change gracefully, and then someone rearranges our grocery store.
you never know what someone is going through. for instance i didnt know i was going through anything until about 2 years later. i thought i was just chilling
8.46am__

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Shanghai River Cruise 44 by Lenore Holt-Darcy
by t*tomorrow
I think the funniest dynamic for arranged-marriage royalty would be a queen who came here 100% prepared to murder her future husband and rule as a widow queen in her own right, only to discover that the king is autistic as hell and responds to her wish to rule with "oh thank god please do, I don't want to be bothered by these people. I can just tell them to go bother you instead, if you really want that. I've got beetles I wanted to study."
"I'm really not good at it," the king admits with horrible, aching grief. The country is in disarray. Peasants go hungry. Nobles trade power amongst themselves with impunity.
So the queen takes over and ruthlessly sets things to rights. Fires several generals, hangs nobles, redirects wealth to the peasantry. It isn't long before the first assassination attempt, which she expected.
She did not expect her docile, beetle-obsessed husband to go absolutely feral and fling himself at the assassins wielding a pair of sharp knives.
Also, the beetles are intended to attack and kill a certain type of invasive worm that has been killing off the gourd and potato crops for decades. He’s been trying since he was a child to crossbreed several native species to be hardier and better diggers. When he finally gets it right it’s all over for you bitches (“you bitches” being mass starvation of subsistence farmers).
The Queen says she’ll negotiate a trade deal with a neighboring country that has also suffered from the worm blight and her husband stares at her for a long moment.
“No,” he finally says. “We’re going to give them the beetles for free.”
The Queen pauses.
“All right,” she says.
GIRLS!!!!!! gather roung. we are looking at this pillbug
jesus christ. fine. ill say it. im sleepy. im sleepy, okay? do you know what being sleepy does to a person? to their spirit? i should be pitied.

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The girls are exeeerrrcising
don't hide your tags bestie this is so cute
having online friends is so fun! but watch out! the distinse......
If you make jokes about your area of expertise you're just being flippant and disrespectful and if you discuss the topic with any degree of seriousness, you're a cringeworthy elitist. Solution: take drugs and finger yourself until you die of thirst.
they’re horrors to YOU, however i’m turned on by them
Sylvia Plath, from a letter to Aurelia Plath written c. April 1956

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Bothering the beast
ideal career: gay trophy husband