I want to speak for a minute on the subject of ‘outing’ someone. Regardless of gender, sexuality, race, putting all of that aside. Overall, the idea of ‘outing.’
A lot of people feel like it’s their right to know. It’s your right as a member of the LGBTQ community to know how someone else identifies. It’s your right as a journalist to know what body parts someone was born with. It’s your right as a member of society to know who someone is sleeping with, just because their career happens to be in the spotlight.
I want to let you know that you are wrong. Not only are you wrong, you’re a part of the problem. Privacy is something we, as a society, struggle with on a daily basis and on every level. I know women who work in offices and don’t talk about their boyfriends. I know men who date men, but the world around them thinks they date women. I know women, who were born male-bodied, but do not identify as trans*.
All of these things are okay. In fact, they’re more than okay, in a lot of cases they’re necessary. I’m not just talking about the potential for violent crimes, which by the way is OUTRAGEOUS. Safety is a huge issue, especially in the LGBT*Q community, EVEN MORE so in the trans* community, EVEN MORE MORE so if you’re a person of color in the trans* community. And, my god, we need countless amounts of education on this subject. We need to be talking about these things.
But this goes even further than that, this goes back to the beginning. This is about feeling like you have the right to out someone. What’s more, the obligation to out someone. Your journalistic integrity which is so self-important you’re willing to risk the quality of lives of others, and more than the quality of life. The ACTUAL LIFE.
People who will lose their jobs, their families, their sense of self, and again theirlives, because of something which is not your right in the first place.
What’s more, as a member of the community, thinking it’s okay to out another member of the community? Are you fucking serious? Do you not remember the feelings of absolutely terror and confusion at the mere prospect of coming out? Do you not recognize the journey we all have to go through? Is your sassy bullshit joke and pointed-finger more important than another human beings’ sense of self? Shaming/bullying someone into coming out is so fucked. Just stop.
You can not imagine how damaging it is to out another human being. You have no right to stake claim on their person. You have no right strip them naked and shove them in the middle of a crowded room and point out what you consider to be a flaw. Your ignorance is your own, you can choose to be educated and understand or you can choose to put yourself first and take our society ten steps backwards. Think before you speak, your words could directly affect the lives and safety of those around you.
