You
I cannot give anyone my whole heart after you - because I have no whole heart after you.
And I go out on dates with others, pretending I am going out on a date with you,
And I dress up in all your favorite colors, pretending I am going to see you,
And I paint my lips red, getting ready to leave the marks of my lips on you,
And the doorbell rings -
And it is not you.
And I go inside his car dressed in all your favorite colors,
And I try to avoid eye contact with him -
Because he is not you.
Perhaps if I look down I can pretend that you are the one beside me.
And I hate it when he tells me to look at him,
Because I am forced to face the truth that those are not the eyes of you.
And he speaks to me meaningless words with a voice that is not your voice,
And they are poison to my ears because the only sound I want to hear,
Is the sound of you.
And with every kiss he gives me I feel suffocated because I know,
Those are not your lips.
And with the touch of his hand I feel dead inside because,
Those are not your fingertips.
And when he calls and the phone rings,
I still hope it’s you on the other line -
But I answer and it’s him,
And his voice sends bullets down my spine,
Because no matter how much older I get,
In this life you will always be the only love of mine.
















