celebrities that don’t follow the met gala theme automatically go to the top of my guillotine list. like you have one job. you are literally glorified court jesters. you only exist to entertain us. and you can’t even do that; instead you wear some boring ass black tux to the one event i actually want you to flaunt your wealth. what are you doing

honestly the idea of play fighting with someone till one of us manages to pin the other down and fuck them into submission is so hot i want to be bruised and exhausted and unable to do anything but take it

me: *watches criminal minds for 9 hours* anything: *makes a noise* me: I’m looking for a white male between the ages of 25-45 probably a loner probably most definitely hates women probably drives a red late model dodge truck probably lives alone his moms name is Helen and his favorite color skittles are the red ones