Simon

The TGR Staff - composed of six members - got together on Friday to plan how we’d like to close our final day on our current platform. We talked for about 45 minutes, had a few drinks, and reminisced for an extra hour about the seven glorious years publishing this amazing website know around the world as THE GOONER REPORT. We remembered the beginning, some specific posts, gooners we got to meet (some in person), projects we developed, projects that never came to fruition, the lessons shared, organizing Maysturbation marathons, and the precious gifts we received from our audience. Soon we were butt naked and gooning out together to honor our most dear project (TGR), our followers, and ourselves. What better way to celebrate than a proper goonlebration? On Saturday we decided that we’d just treat this day as any other day and post what we still had queued up. Let us make one thing clear: Tumblr is sinking but TGR is alive and strong. As we just said in the previous post, TGR will live on in the memories our our readers and followers and our message will still be spread around the world. You now possess a good grasp on gooning arts and it’s your obligation to teach as many as guys as you can about the joys of gooning. We never said we’d cancel our TGR. We never said we were tired of publishing it. So there is a chance that we will pick it up somewhere else. Where? We don’t know yet exactly. We know that we want to keep it free so we are not inclined to move onto a paid platform. We know we can’t just go somewhere else that does not support the type of thing we do here: an interactive magazine with easy access to an archive. We conducted researches and paid attention to what people were indicating to us, but nothing concrete or good was found until this moment. We took the necessary precautions to secure our content but the future is an exciting but still unknown adventure. We are not making promises, but we will see what is feasible and we will try to keep on going for many more years to come. For now, this is what we know:

You have until midnight PST to consult our archive.

We hold the copyright to some of our content so we can always make a new project - be it a book, album, video - with that content. No one else has the permission to publish and distribute our content or attempt to modify it.

We will keep our Tumblr account open because we don’t want anyone else possibly taking over our handle and turning it into something else. However, we will not update it (unless extremely necessary) and we will shut down the ‘Ask a question’ feature.

If you want to stay up to date with The Gooner Report, you must follow us on Twitter. Click here and follow us now (if you haven’t followed us already). That is the only official social media account for TGR and the only way to learn about any future projects. 

We will close this by saying “see you around.” We won’t say goodbye or anything else. Follow our advice given over the years and keep on perfecting your gooning. Also, at every possible chance, please practice this: teach other men about gooning and seek to broaden our brotherhood. There is so much stigma regarding healthy sexual activities already so do never misrepresent, mischaracterize, or allow others to spread misconceptions about gooning. So many people have tried over the years to culturally appropriate gooning but we have done our best to elucidate and teach legit gooning. You have been paying attention so now it’s on you: teach and protect gooning. Savor gooning. Elevate gooning. Celebrate gooning. Be a legit gooner! Save our lessons to your computer if you must and never forget: if you received something good, share it with others. We share gooning with the world because we want the world to know about how precious gooning is and what some people are missing out.

Gooning legend gooner JerkoffboyCT - also known as gooner Marcel (and briefly as “gooner Mar”) - is so popular that we don’t even need to write anything introducing him anymore. If you’ve been following TGR for a while, you’re familiar with him and should know a great deal about him already. His new voicemail comes after long four year hiatus… we don’t know why it took him so long to call us again, but we’re glad he just did. This new voicemail confirms that he is proud of being who he is and that he still engages in cock love every chance he gets. We can hear him talking himself into the gooning state and when he finally goons… wow, it’s deep and stooopidly delicious as gooning oughta be. Long live the amazing gooner JerkoffboyCT!

Sometimes, even sites for supposedly chronic masturbators, some guys will comment that you shouldn’t let your masturbation get to the point where it interferes with a “normal” life. I strongly disagree. I truly believe that you should masturbate as much as you want (or better, need) to and that more masturbation should always be encouraged regardless of how much a guy already masturbates. Discouraging any amount of masturbation just creates feelings of guilt and shame and that’s, of course, not good.

Although I’ve never had any trouble embracing my addiction to chronic masturbation, I imagine that guys might have (especially considering the undertone influences of our generally puritanical society that sex, and especially masturbation, is bad). Some guys might feel guilt or shame at spending so much time masturbating; or, even worse, actually try to get “help” about “curing” their addiction. They might worry that they’re “missing out” on doing other things.

One of the best things about having the Internet in general and sites like Bateworld in particular is that is lets guys know that there are other chronic masturbators out there, many of whom will offer support, affirmation, and encouragement to masturbate even more. Hopefully, eventually, every chronic masturbator will come not only to accept his addiction, but embrace it.

For me, embracing the addiction means to love it, be free of all guilt or shame about it, strive to masturbate even more without any either society- or self-imposed limits, even if that means that you spend ALL your non-work time masturbating. Also, even the idea and act of masturbating so much turns you on and just makes you masturbate even more: a never ending cycle of increasing masturbation addiction.

To me, there is nothing hotter and more appealing than a guy who is severely addicted to masturbating. He doesn’t just do it because it feels good, but because he has a deep physical and phychological addiction to doing it. He needs to masturbate. For him, masturbating is his natural state and any time he’s not masturbating is spent thinking about the next time he’ll get to masturbate. I want to know such men, such brothers in Penis Masturbation.

One of our concerns is to always present educative and interesting posts about gooning on TGR. The more a gooner learns, the better off he is. Also, the more info available for a newbie, the sooner he’ll develop into an amazing gooner. We’re here to help and instruct.

We have already published many lessons and articles on how to goon. But we’re also always open to other people’s takes on gooning. We have published/reblogged some in the past and will continue to do so.

In this post we present what’s been called Gooning 101 by bi-caps.com. Notice that they approach it as if teaching straight guys. That’s very interesting. The only thing we disagree is the use of the word stupid. A gooner isn’t stupid… he gets stooopid. Stooopid on cock.

So sit back, and enjoy the lesson.

Gotta a lesson or something to share? Well then please send it to us!

Me gooning back of my truck in the Angels forest… beers, briefs, boner, nature… makes for a goontard!  So cal gooner here… [email protected]  bulge and goon.

__________________________ TGR Comment:

Dear myunderpants4321,

We’re glad you found your way to The Gooner Report. Some people had written us asking if we had any pictures featuring the expert in briefs guy gooning, but we had none. We actually had to ask around to find out who you were but had no success finding your personal blog and/or a picture of you gooning. Great that you have found us first and we’re glad you’ve already contributed with a great picture. Keep gooning out in the middle of the nature, bud. It will recharge your spirit with power.

Goon on, TGR Staff