yo

myth: latin and greek are dead languages because nobody speaks them anymore

fact: latin and greek are dead languages because 90% of your vocabulary is about murder, death, and dying

myth: classics students are all very aloof and haughty, and everyone admires them from afar because they seem composed and sophisticated

fact: average classics student cries three times a day for reasons including but not limited to: greek, the archaic smile, the destruction of an ancient monument, the realization that their life means very little in the grand scheme of things, they have an exam tomorrow and they still can’t conjugate latin verbs in all of the subjunctive forms, half of the research they need is outdated and/or written by misogynists/homophobes/classists/racists/etc., did i say greek yet, really that’s where half of the crying comes from

myth: the ancient greeks and romans are amazing role models and classicists all admire them

fact: most ancient greeks and romans are weirdos who do things like live in empty wine casks and draw dicks all over their dinnerware. this does not stop classicists from admiring them, because most classicists are also weirdos who have contemplated the wine cask thing

myth: classical mythology is full of beautiful, poignant stories that classicists hold as the height of religious storytelling

fact: zeus was a furry, everyone hates agamemnon, and if any classicist tells you they haven’t briefly thought about becoming a follower of dionysus while in a drunken stupor the night before an exam, they are lying

myth: it’s all greek to me!