does anyone know how to get what you want when you're the type of person who avoids everything

don't ever look up what your childhood friends are up to now!!!!!!!!!! like girl you're a nuclear safety engineer. i put on matching socks today. we played tag a thousand years ago.

i literally cannot convey how long i fucking laughed after i realized that boobytrap backwards is partyboob

i really hope that this does not end up being the text post that defines my entire tumblr career

Why are people so mean and cruel I love silliness and joy and whimsy and respect and love

there should be a cool, chill way to say things like “I’m struggling” or “I’m having a hard time” that doesn’t imply you might have needs

couldnt come up with a reply that would instantly reveal how funny and witty i am. must i die now