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phantom claws almost seem to cling to your skin- sliding from the curve of your shoulders to your nape and back in a chilling caress. one that made you consider scrubbing yourself with soap for a second or third time in the last twenty-four hours.

honestly, it felt like it should have been something insignificant — it wasn’t as if it had turned into something deeper and harder to erase from your memory.. but it if it continued to linger at the back of your head, then maybe it really was worth addressing.

but with the amount of paperwork you had missed out on filing to go on a date, there was hardly any time to be dwelling. the second of the fatui harbingers had been expecting these files for two days now, and if he was to go searching to find that they did not exist.. well, you didn’t want to find out whether or not you would be coming into work the next day.

let alone if you would be alive to tell that story.

maybe you would be. for whatever reason, the doctor was not too harsh with you. sure, he did not hold back from tasking you with practically everything menial and ultimately mundane, but if it was not pressing- he was.. somewhat lenient, and patient.

something to do with having lived so long, perhaps. however, you still did not want to abuse that leniency.

even if you didn’t see yourself finishing these files any time soon today.

lowering the stack of reports in your hands, you found yourself reaching for your shoulders for maybe the twenty-ninth time already since starting your day, and squeezed.

it felt silly — and if the seafoam haired male was to enter through the door right now.. you were sure to hear a mouthful. something about hiring an assistant not a masseuse — certainly if they were working away at their own muscle tension — or perhaps he might fuss in the way a doctor would.

either way, this.. wasn’t a conversation to be had with him. you felt ashamed to discuss it, embarrassed even, and dottore was sure to tell you the same things you had been trying to tell yourself this past day. possibly a little more clinically, as he didn’t really bother with lingering on these sorts of things.

which was maybe how you should be handling this, so perhaps his own opinion would be helpful at this moment to silence your pondering.

but it wasn’t as if you were intending to ask. it would be too insignificant to ask him to say, not to mention random, and certainly quite.. childish.

forcing your hands away when crescents had unknowingly begun to appear in your clothing, you returned them to the papers you had placed down, wishing they would still. shaky penmanship was the last thing you needed, not to mention crinkled files from how hard you were grasping the sides.

the doctor liked his work prim and clean, stored as neatly as possible for him to return to if he ever needed anything from them.

so it was best to be meticulous with them- although that.. became increasingly harder to accomplish.

and as if fate had wanted to drive the final nail into the coffin, there was the doctor himself.

waiting expectantly for the papers that should have been filed yesterday.

“lord harbinger,” you quickly greeted, dropping the reports from your hands to rise from your place. “i wasn’t expecting your visit- i would have brewed some tea, if so..” you followed up, lowering your head into a bow. “how.. might i be of assistance to you?”

a hum seemed to leave said male’s lips as he approached your desk, splaying his leather-clad fingers across the scattered sheets of his writings. “no need, my dear.. unless you might have something capable of jogging memories.” he spoke up, returning his hand behind him. “the monthly expenses the regrator sent for were meant to be completed on my desk by this morning.” he continued, glancing over at the wall before returning his masked gaze to you. “not that anyone is keeping count, but it is currently midday.” past his near nonexistent lunch time.

your heart just about dropped to your stomach as your eyes widened, hairs raising beneath the fabric of your clothing.

right. that was something you were meant to do, but with the date weighing heavily on your mind — you had run out of the lab with a mental reminder to address it later.

something which you.. obviously did not do, considering the swarm of thoughts that had fogged your brain after said date.

perhaps it might have been for the better to have ditched, if only to avoid the discomfort gained from it, and the festering anxiety at the possibility of losing your job or quite possibly meeting your demise. the doctor was.. not the kindest, anyway — polite, tolerant and patient, yes. but when it came to his work.. different story.

your eyes squeezed shut as you gripped the fabric of your clothing, willing your body to cease its trembling. “forgive my actions, lord harbinger — nothing i say will be a worthy enough excuse.. but please, allow me to make it up to you in any way that i can.” you tried offering, ignoring the lump lodging itself in your throat. “i’ll finish it right away- deliver a letter of condolences, a box of pastries from the marketplace- take on any extra work you have — anything! just, please..” a breath spilled from your lips, tears clinging to your lashes. “please allow me to continue working here — you have my word going onwards that this will never happen again, and that i will continue to deliver the results required of me..”

“just please let me stay.” you almost wanted to add, but you knew you shouldn’t. it was.. ultimately his choice on what he wanted to do with you, and at the end of the day — the word of a harbinger was above your own, certainly the second.

you only prayed he would understand, as that was all you could really do now. you’d offered everything that you could have, anyway, now the ball was.. frighteningly within his court.

silence befell your humble office, and for all of three suffocating beats spent awaiting his verdict, dottore let out a soft, contemplative noise. “now i am curious, what is this excuse that is not worthy enough to run by me, my dear?”

lifting your head to meet his mask gaze, slightly closer than it had been before, your lips parted in shock before they closed, eyes flitting elsewhere — anywhere other than your boss. why would he possibly want to know? moreover, what would he even say to the fact that your romantic life ( if it could even be called that now ) took precedence over his finances?

still, he had you cornered in your office, and lying would only paint a worse picture of yourself.

so your gaze returned to him, chapped appendages separating once more. “i.. had a date, i suppose,” you began freeing a hand from your attire to cradle your arm. “but it.. didn’t go very well, and i guess i shut down a little once i took my leave..” saying it aloud felt almost pathetic, especially when you were telling one of the most fearsome harbingers of them all — comparable to the powers of the divine. but said harbinger just seemed to wait in silence, offering up his full, undivided attention.

by the gods, you did not deserve his kindness.

squeezing your arm, you shook your head, letting out a breath to recompose yourself. there were still a few details that needed mentioning, after all. “i.. know romance is not exactly a topic that comes up around here, but if i might be permitted to ask, lord harbinger,” you glanced up at him, willing your voice not to waver. “is.. physicality typically involved on the first date?”

if there was a shift in expression beneath the mask, you could not quite see or pick up on it, but the air almost seemed to change. whether in anger at doing something as foolish as to go on a date when there were more pressing matters — far above your personal life, or.. something you could not quite discern.

either way, the atmosphere was.. not what it previously was, and you weren’t sure if that was an improvement, or something far worse.

you considered adding something — to fill the silence or better explain yourself, but by the time your mouth opened, dottore was already speaking.

“physical affection, unless discussed beforehand and explicitly permitted, does not often take place on the first date.” he finally answered, measured and clinical. “i’m not entirely sure which boundaries you may have established or not established, but having one’s hands on you without consent as a standard to relationships is not normal.”

stiffening in your place, the phantom tendrils seemed to drag themselves from the peak of your shoulders down along the blades, and it took all of you not to cover them with your hands — if only to replace the feeling. your employer didn’t need to see that- he didn’t need to see you so pathetic, and yet..

“oh, dear..” he spoke up a little quieter this time, reaching into his coat to pull out a neatly folded handkerchief as he held it to your teary eyes. “it must have been immensely terrible to have made you react in such a way..” he added softly, uncharacteristically tender, just as the gentle press of the silky fabric had been to the apples of your cheeks.

unable to stop yourself from sniffling once his voice had come out so sympathetically, you allowed your tears to spill freely, bringing a hand to grip the fibers over your chest. “i-i’m so sorry — i should have been more clear- or i shouldn’t have even gone.” you sobbed out, trembling in your place with only the softness against your eyes to ground you from the spiral of thoughts you’d been stuck in since the date had ended. “i.. i didn’t think it needed to be said — i put my trust into them so blindly, and in turn, i just-”

“hush now, dear.” the doctor cut in without bite, pulling away to wipe at your opposite eye. “your decision was immensely careless, naive, and foolish altogether.. but you cannot be faulted for an occurrence you had no way of foreseeing.” he continued, lowering his hand to hold out the cloth for you to take. “your actions will not be punished, nor will i let you go — since that was your main concern — however,” a pause, and then a low sigh. “you must know to establish boundaries going forward, as to avoid situations like.. these.” certainly with individuals that were experiencing romantic arrangements for the first time.

which was applicable to your current case, but nonetheless shocking to hear coming from the second harbinger of all people.

taking the handkerchief with tentative fingers, you wiped at your cheeks and eyes a final time for yourself, letting out another sniffle as your head lowered. “i’ll.. do better,” you vowed, stilling the azure cloth to meet his masked gaze. “thank you for being so understanding, lord harbinger. you didn’t have to be, and.. yet you were.”

he scoffed lightly at the apology, but he didn’t seem put off in any way, merely plucking the cloth when it was held out to him before slipping it back into his coat. “i would hope so. if given other circumstances i would have reacted much differently.” crueler. “but a case like this needs to be treated.. delicately. so i leave you with a parting advice to bring your preferences across, even if you deem them unnecessary.”

that seemed reasonable enough. not entirely impossible, and within your abilities.

you nodded slowly, mustering a small smile. “you have my word, lord harbinger.. for the rest- i will do my best to have the work on your desk as soon as i can, but um- if i might be so bold.. could i ask something of you?”

amused, dottore tilted his head, folding his arms across his chest. “a favor after i let you off the hook so easily? how bold.” he hummed out, stepping forward. “well then, what is it, my dear?” a raise? a longer vacation? less hours?

sucking in a breath and expelling it, you moved in front of your desk to be directly in front of him, parting your lips carefully. “i’d.. like for you to touch me, lord harbinger.” you spoke up, willing your voice steady itself. “here- on the shoulders.”

the doctor blinked once and then twice before his gaze fell to your shoulders and then your face. was this meant to be a test? “are you entirely certain that you want that?” most would be repulsed, after all, having been previously touched in a way they did not want.

but you only nodded your head, meeting his gaze with full confidence. “i’m certain. please, lord harbinger, if you would..”

and because he wanted to find out for himself what you were intending to prove, he brought his leather-clad hands to your shoulders — resting them there. “any different?”

closing your eyes as the tension seeped out just slightly, you found your head tipping forward in agreement, lips pressing into a small smile. “significantly.. thank you, lord harbinger.”

notes. sorry if dottie is a little outta character here aksjskc just wanted to be comforted so this may have been rather self indulgent in that regard.. but anyway, be sure to always establish boundaries even if you think you don’t have to- it’s always good to do so.

tysm for reading! consider leaving a tip if you enjoyed<3

“Hmm, you’re not entirely wrong. I came to you because I missed your company.” While his tone might rile someone else up or cause some sort of negative reaction, you remained as calm and collected as you usually did. He faltered momentarily in the face of your honesty.

“Well,” he sniffed, trying to brush you off, “I am going to be quite busy here, so I won’t be able to entertain you.” A few moments of silence passed.

“Alright, if you want me to go, then I will. I won’t distract you.” You conceded and began to make your way out of the room.

“Wait.” The Segment had put down everything he was tinkering with and stared at you, mouth slightly agape, as if he wasn’t expecting you to listen to him. Eighteen glanced around the area for something to stall you with, to delay your departure. Ah, some documents that needed to be delivered to another Segment. He could just ask you to pass them on and then manage to strike up something research-related, and then you could linger-

But that is when he remembered that you wouldn’t come back anyway, and what’s more, your time for the rest of the day would probably be consumed by that other version of him. He wasn’t very fond of you leaving him to go to someone else.

“Yes?” You cocked your head to the side, awaiting his response. He felt heat crawl up his neck.

“Nothing,” he said dumbly. You let out a hum in response and turned around again, slowly strolling toward the exit, taking the time to look at the ceiling and examine the bits of machinery and reports here and there. It was almost like you were doing this on purpose.

“If there’s nothing else, then I’ll see you-” You were nearly at the door before something collided into you from behind, knocking the words out of your mouth. It only took a few seconds to notice that Eighteen had latched himself onto your back, arms wrapped around your sides.

“H-Hey?” At most, you were expecting the Segment to create an excuse to get you to stay, not tackle you from behind, but you weren’t complaining. “Eighteen?” The call of his name made his breath hitch as he loosened his grip on you a bit.

“I…” The words got stuck in his throat, the short curls of his blue hair tickling your cheek. There wasn’t really a convincing way to bluff his way out of this when he’d practically thrown himself onto you. “I was going to ask you to…” Just being around you was making him lightheaded.

It was then that you wiggled out of his grip to turn around, placing your hands on his shoulders and looking at him with the kindest gaze anyone had ever given him.

“I’ll stay,” you said simply, before sauntering back to your place again at the top of his desk, patting your thigh like it was a motion for him to come closer. Of course, he had his ways, but he was more obedient to you than he’d ever admit.

Eighteen hovered in front of you, arms hanging lanky by his side as if he had forgotten how to use them after embracing you, before you grabbed his hands and placed them on your waist. He swallowed, acting as if the heat that was burning him up was nothing. Your thumb rubbed circles along his jaw before cupping his chin and pulling him in.

The Segment whimpered as your lips connected, and one hand moved to grip the back of your shirt while the other fiercely sank into your softness. Your hand reached to caress his cheek, and the other massaged his scalp, and his knees almost gave out at the sensation.

There are very few things in this world that Eighteen would describe as lovely, if any, but you unquestionably were. And he would probably be indulging in your loveliness until he was out of breath… which would probably be soon, but you’re good at telling him to take breaks, right?

—

Although all of the Segments had their own disputes and feelings about each other, it had become obvious that Eighteen was a bit more… vocal about his displeasure. Perhaps it stemmed from being one of the youngest of the Segments, maybe from the frequent and ever-present feeling of being overlooked and rejected, or maybe something else. And every so often, you had to witness such situations.

In this case, while the thirty-five-year-old Segment found it interesting to read through the Akademiya’s editorials and other publications from time to time, the eighteen-year-old would scoff and roll his eyes whenever the topic was brought up. It wasn’t hard to understand why. The young Segment was stuck reliving the pain of attending and being excluded for his ideas, the trauma of being blamed for the death of someone he didn’t cause. It was no wonder he had stronger feelings about the school while the older ones had mellowed out. 

“Do you really need to spend so much time reading those things? Surely it can’t be that interesting. Nothing from people who allow themselves to be chained to the rules can,” Eighteen huffed as he eyed the paper the older Segment was reading. Thirty-Five seemed unbothered.

“I won’t deny that. However, generalizing would be a mistake. There are a few pieces that manage to hold some substance, although they are exceedingly rare.” The Segment agreed, and yet somewhat did not at the same time. Eighteen clicked his tongue, and that was when he turned to you for support.

“[Name], don’t you agree? You’ve experienced the hypocrisy of the Akademiya firsthand, have you not?” There was something in the younger Segment’s eyes that seemed like he was searching for your approval.

“Me? Well, I-” It was then that you paused, and something quite sad dawned on you. You had been able to change, but he could not. Thirty-Five then glanced at your downcast expression.

“Eighteen, do refrain from asking them intrusive questions.” The older Segment let out a sigh.

“Can’t I be curious about their opinion?” Because you were the only person who would take him seriously and answer him with something thoughtful.

“Not at their expense.” Eighteen chewed his lip at the older Segment’s words before taking a glimpse at your face and seeing your glumness. His mouth opened - to say what, he didn’t even know - before closing it. An awkward silence fell, and he quietly left.

You soon found where he had run off to soon after, and he looked like he was expecting you.

“Did I offend you?” He couldn’t help being blunt. It was just in his nature to ask difficult questions and seek difficult answers. You let out a small laugh. Before, he didn’t seem to care in the moment, but it seemed that, after some reflection, he truly did care about your feelings.

“No… No, you didn’t. I know you just wanted a direct answer from a direct question. I just needed some time to think about it.” Eighteen’s stiff posture relaxed a bit after receiving your reassurance.

“But anyway… Eighteen, I’ve… moved on from those times. From what they did to me at least. It still upsets me, but it was so long ago. I don’t want to waste my energy on it.” You remember all the stares and chatter that popped up when you decided to stay with The Outcast, from your peers and professors and the Sages, effectively making the others push you away. But it wasn’t something you would ever regret. You would choose Zandik again and again, no matter what others told you. However, the Segment didn’t look satisfied with that answer.

“They threw you out of the Akademiya without any attempts at accommodations. They would hardly spare you a glance or listen to when you asked for extensions or tried to explain your condition.” He progressively raised his voice as he recounted your struggles. “And those people, they looked at you like-” He bit his tongue as if uttering it would send him into a deeper fury. “Those doctors too, they just brushed you aside and-”

It was then you truly realized that Eighteen wasn’t just scarred from his own rejection. At how cruelly he was received by everyone around him. He was upset about how they treated you too. At how his only beloved had to suffer so terribly. 

You grabbed Eighteen’s hand, and that seemed to bring him back to you. In all honesty, you weren’t even sure how you could go about this. You could teach him how to love, but it was a different story helping him to shed such deep-seated insecurity and nonacceptance.

“I know. I remember all of that, and I don’t like it either, just as I hate what both of us had to go through.” One of your hands brushed his palm, while the other stroked the top. “But… the Akademiya can’t hurt me again. And… they can’t hurt you. We aren’t there anymore. I know I can’t change your mind, but… we’re here now. Things are different, and I have you with me. And I’m very happy with you right now, in this moment. At the very least, know that.” 

You felt as if that was a flimsy answer, but you didn’t know what else to say. Because in truth, it was only natural he could never forget those experiences, especially at such a tender age. 

“… I guess if that’s really what you think, then I’m inclined to take your opinion into consideration.” There were a few beats of silence before Eighteen quietly replied. You could only wrap your arms around him, burying your face in the crook of his neck. He slowly reciprocated and held you, and he felt something flutter in his chest when you pressed a small kiss to his skin.

You were so warm. He would not compare it to an all-consuming fire that chased things away from it and made hearts race in fear. You were just… warm.

But you knew that although you said all of that, your poor boy could never move on from the pain of rejection embedded into his very core. 

—

There was a quiet corner of the lab that Eight seemed to like to hang around in besides being in his room, and he soon introduced you to it. The attachment was beginning to grow deep, as he began to show you more of his notebooks and various texts the others had given him - mainly from Forty-Five and the original Zandik. 

“So, this is where you’ve been.” A voice suddenly echoed nearby, the click of Eighteen’s boots sounding as well. The older Segment appeared in front of you, and when he noticed the young boy on your lap, his expression changed.

“Hi, Eighteen. I’m surprised you’ve found us all the way out here. Did you need something?” Eight glanced at him but kept his head down in his books.

“I..” His usual brashness seemed to temporarily dissipate at the sight. The child sat in your lap, with one hand keeping him securely positioned and the other playing with his soft hair, adorning him with soft kisses on his cheek from time to time as he pointed to things and explained them. But after a few moments, his attitude came back. 

“I came for you. Because we have things to do.” You raised your eyebrows, still keeping your gentle smile on your face.

“Like…?” The Segment floundered for an answer.

“Reports. Research. I need your opinion.” He crossed his arms as if you should have already known.

“I’m happy to help you with all of that. But right now, I’m with Eight.” You patted the child’s head to emphasize. “I’m sure I could come visit you when we’re done, though.” He didn’t move from that spot as you turned your attention back to the kid. You praised his younger self and nodded along with his ideas, and Eighteen gritted his teeth. He couldn’t stand to watch something so childish and nonsensical. 

“And Forty-Five is calling for you, Eight.” Eighteen suddenly interrupted once more, drawing your attention to him once again.

“I didn’t hear anything in the hive-mind.” Eight put his book down and quietly replied.

“Well, maybe you weren’t paying attention.” His response was immediate and scowling. You frowned and shot the older Segment a look, but he ignored your gaze. A few seconds later, the child grabbed his notebooks and was heading off.

“Bye, [Name].” Eight lingered near you as you smoothed down his hair from all the ruffling you did before departing.

“Bye-bye, my dear.” You waved him goodbye, and now only you and Eighteen were left in the room. “Alright then, I guess we should-”

“Why do you tolerate him?!” The force of his words had you taken aback, but you had a feeling where this was going.

“Why… Why would I not-”

“He doesn’t know what he’s talking about, or what he’s doing. He shouldn’t speak about it as if he-”

“Eight has some good ideas-”

“Those are naive fantasies from someone who doesn’t understand how the world works. They are implausible. We have actual work to do, and we shouldn’t be wasting time listening to him. Not me, not you.” He had balled his fists up so tightly, you were sure it was painful.

People may not have wanted to listen to his ideas as a kid, but that little boy still had the ability to dream all the childish ideas he wanted. But for Eighteen, people still did not want to listen to his ideas, and he had gradually lost that ability to think freely as a child would. That was why he could not stand to be around Eight, who was the beginning of the ideas that others scorned him for, but still persisted to dream about them anyway.

“… But even if they are just childish fantasies, don’t they deserve to be appreciated and nurtured anyway? Perhaps so they could even grow into something more?” You took small steps toward him, his back turned to you as he shook. “And there were so many things that others said couldn’t be done, but you accomplished them anyway, didn’t you?” You placed your hand on his back, and the shaking stopped momentarily as you pressed your face against him.

“I love every part of you. The parts of you that make me smile and laugh. And the parts that others may have hated or feared about you… I love those just as much, and they deserve to be loved and seen.” Your arms reached to snake around Eighteen’s sides as he seemed to calm down, or at least stop shaking. “You don’t need to hide away those parts of yourself, because I want to learn about them all the same. So please don’t say that.” 

You could see that he wasn’t going to respond to you. So instead, you continued to hold Eighteen from behind as he blinked back tears and reached to place his hand over yours.

Upon first meeting, Neuvillette feels unusually tense around you without any understanding why. Whether you are meeting at your place of work (say if you are a baker, a mercenary, guard, etc), haphazardly in public or at the Opera, or whilst delivering something to Neuvillette's office in the Palais Mermonia, he finds the first encounter strange and off-putting. You look human enough, surely, as human as anyone else does.

He feels guilty, in that he may miss much of your initial conversation in attempting to figure out what about you strikes him as odd. There are hundreds of faces he sees on a nearly daily basis, and he's truly seen all, but it is you he absolutely cannot shake. Is it how you hold yourself? How you speak to him? It truly wracks his brain, and he barely gets to know you in attempting to understand why you seem to make him feel this way.

When you leave, Neuvillette gingerly requests the assistance of a nearby Melusine (Sedene, if he's in his office) who'd seen you. He asks if she's noticed anything peculiar or off-putting about your person, since Melusines are uniquely skilled in seeing beyond the physical form.

To his utter disbelief, the Melusine returns his just slightly distressed expression with a big, cheery smile. She gushes about how friendly you are towards her and the other Melusines, and that your essence looks just like that of Monsieur Neuvillette's! Neuvillette blinks at this information, brows knitting together as he tries to make sense of it. Were the Melusines being literal in viewing a kind person as similar to him (if so, he is quite flattered), or is it more than that?

He spies you in the far distance, as something catches your attention and prompting you to stop. A staggered breath spills from his lips seeing two near-identical blue rhinophores among the strands of your hair. In his utter disbelief (and slight stupidity), he does not chase after you, but remains standing there, unable to grasp what he's just witnessed.

In all his centuries of being in this human form, he has never met another dragon, let alone what he assumes to be another of his own kind. He has met Vishaps, yes, he has heard rumors of the Geo and Dendro sovereigns in neighboring nations, but he has yet to meet another true Hydro Dragon, let alone one that assumes human form like he does.

The next few days in his office pass remarkably slowly. Neuvillette is uncharacteristically unproductive as he now replays that first meeting over and over in his head like a record, trying to analyze each word you spoke, the expression in your eyes, the overall characteristics of you. Were you aware that Neuvillette was like you, too, and simply made no acknowledgement of it? Were there more like you, somewhere? How had someone like you existed without once ever catching his eye?

Whatever your story may be, Neuvillette finds he can hardly function without answers. In the many centuries of his now human-esque existence, he has been left to his own devices to figure out what it means to be a dragon, what to expect, and how to live as one among human society. The answers he's sought now dangle before him tauntingly, just barely out of reach.

Whilst he can scour endless tomes and read human recollections of dragonkind and its lost culture, it provides an outside, matter-of-fact perspective of his kind that gets him no closer to understanding who he is meant to be. By meeting you, Neuvillette now has access to learn about the true lived experience of a dragon, the emotions attached to it, the quiet details that no book could capture.

He decides it, then. The Iudex will seek you out again, selfishly subscribing to the pursuit of his own desires, to make sense of someone like him that has appeared seemingly out of the blue (did you come from the ocean…?)

As determined as the Chief Justice is, he sends you a rather awkward, straightforward letter requesting your company in his office. He cannot hope for an agreed meeting whilst requesting for a meeting place in the middle of nowhere with a complete stranger - he understands this, so his office is the best he can do.

Until you arrive, the Iudex will pace his office, wondering what questions to ask and what you might say. He wonders if openly revealing his identity to another will be a mistake.

He also wishes to befriend you. Though the Iudex prefers to keep a respectful distance from many for the sake of impartiality, he would at the very least prefer to make an amicable relationship between himself and one of his kind. Neuvillette fears unintentionally offending you, not knowing whether or not to subscribe more to human politeness or to truly unmask and allow himself to adopt more draconic tendencies.

His office is… overprepared, to say the least. Recalling how Lady Furina used to host guests, he has requested sweets and savory sandwiches be prepared. Neuvillette has even brought with him one of his favorite bottles of water, a vintage from the snowy mountains of Snezhnaya. He wonders if all Hydro Dragons share the same love of tasting water or if he is truly unique in his pleasures.

When you arrive, your eyes widen at how many preparations were made seemingly just for you. You sheepishly ask the Iudex if he is expecting others, and he seems to avoid your gaze when he tells you plainly that it is simply the two of you. You are, truthfully… not entirely sure why he's asked you here. You have a single hunch, though.

In your first meeting, you picked up on the fact that he was like you, but you thought it rude or improper to point it out. You figured the two of you were both aware of this fact, so there was no need to air it, especially in a public space. Perhaps the meeting now was to quietly confirm that likeness?

You were right, it seems. Neuvillette asks you to sit. He is calm, donning his typical neutral countenance as he explains his dilemma as of late. You listen, nodding your head, though your eyes curiously dart to the bottle of water before him. That gesture disrupts him so severely that he staggers onto his next word, abandons it, and asks you with a huff of a laugh if you'd like a glass of water.

You bob your head eagerly, watching near ravenously as the Iudex pours his specialty water into a silver goblet. As he hands it to you, your fingers brush against his gloved hand, and you feel a sudden, startling warmth blossom inside you. Forcing it away, you nod gratefully to him, but your excitement is palpable.

The water's flavor is truly like nothing else you've ever tried, and you're sure to tell him how much you enjoyed it. Neuvillette's lips are parted slightly in disbelief, eyes a hint wider than usual, and he cannot help but smile. It seems before he can get to the admission of why he has invited you here, the two of you go down a rabbit hole rambling about water-tasting, which is proof enough of the fact that you, too, are like him.

When the jovial conversation ends, you cannot help but ask Neuvillette why he's brought you here. As flattered as you are to be invited to the Chief Justice's office for conversation, you cannot imagine you made such a first impression for him to do so with a complete stranger. Given the distance he keeps, it would seem uncharacteristic. With courage to rip the metaphorical bandaid off, you blurt and ask if this is because the two of you are both dragons. Hydro dragons, to be specific.

Your directness stuns him into silence. The Iudex takes a moment, but returns your question with an honest nod. He asks how long you'd known for him, and you admit that it was rather evident from a first conversation. Pointed ears, rhinophores, the way the water seemed to react to the both of you. There's almost a tinge of red on his ears as he gives no reaction to your ease of identification of his nature, but simply accepts it.

Indeed, this meeting marks the beginning of a lovely friendship :) Over the following months, you and the Chief Justice share weekly chats in his office about anything and everything. You indulge him in your knowledge of dragonkind - of course, this depends on what your background is, but still, your perspective alone comforts the loneliness he once felt.

Neuvillette reciprocates by telling you what he knows and has learned. In this way, the two of you grow together.

You become a bit tense and overly formal when he casually reveals that he is the Hydro Sovereign. You scold yourself mentally for the impoliteness you have shown him, but Neuvillette insists otherwise and says the only impoliteness would be to not express yourself as you are. It's not instant, but you relax with time, and can become yourself freely around him.

Also, he brings a different type of water to try each meeting - or he tries to. With his busy schedule, he cannot always locate something new, but he tries his very best. Neuvillette lights up with delight when you enjoy one that he does, and seems to feel relief when you share your distaste of a particular type that he, too, found unfavorable (for example, he found water from the northern sea of Nod Krai to be a hint too metallically for his preference).

The rain seems to lessen when you're around. Neuvillette was unaware at first, but he comes to realize this with intrigue. On the days that rain occurs free of his influence, he wonders if it is from you - he feels foolish in realizing how much he now worries for your wellbeing. He hopes that you are well, that you are not grieving in silence as he is accustomed to. On nights where he has finished his work early and the rain pours freely of him, he conveniently shows up to your place of residence with dinner or asking to take a walk with you.

He feels quite silly when he appears on nights when you are perfectly fine, but has come to realize how partial he has become towards you. Neuvillette thinks of you, hears your voice, your laugh, feels the ghost of your fingers brushing his hand, and cannot seem to rid himself of it.

With your friendship comes a deepened understanding of strange feelings and behaviors he has noticed within himself. With you, he feels freer to embrace them and how to properly take care of himself.

For example, you warn Neuvillette about the stiffness and discomfort that can arise if one's rhinophores or horns are not properly attended to. You do not touch his (as they are particularly sensitive for all dragons), but demonstrate on yourself how to relieve tension and massage the base. He replicates your movements and notices, indeed, how much discomfort he's been holding.

You still have yet to show each other your true forms. Let's say over a year has passed. Neuvillette is very shy about it, and you completely understand. You're happy enough just having another hydro dragon as a friend (let alone the Hydro Sovereign).

Since this point, Neuvillette has found himself mimicking many of your behaviors subconsciously. As you grow closer, he notices how often you gift him small things. For example, sometimes you bring him unique waters you've found in your line of work or daily life, perhaps you bring him lunch, or maybe just interesting seashells you've found. Neuvillette reciprocates by returning seashells that he's found on his nightly walks, gifting you ribbons or shiny jewels he has come across, and especially waters he delights in.

What he cannot understand fully, but brings him such immense comfort is hoarding some of the items that once belonged to those he cared about. In one of your meetings, Neuvillette mentions in passing how he holds onto seemingly unimportant items, such as one of Lady Furina's old golden brooches, an envelope containing a letter sent by Duke Wriothesley, a pen the Traveller left behind. He is particularly flustered about and conveniently does not mention how many items of yours he's held onto - including every single seashell you have brought him.

You explain jovially and rather innocently, none the wiser, that dragons hoard items, particularly items they cherish or coming from someone they cherish. Dragons hoarding many items from one individual is typically expected for family members or for mates - and Neuvillette feels a breath caught in his throat.

When he thanks you and you go your separate way, he cannot help but replay on loop what you have said. Though, as more evenings pass, he supposes the context fits uncomfortably well. Neuvillette realizes it rains more when you are absent, that his heart races before each meeting, when he can hear your voice behind a door but cannot yet see your face, how often he thinks of you, how protective he feels over you.

It's one day that Neuvillette, against his better judgement, asks you with a rosy expression how romantic courting works for dragonkind. The Iudex explains that he believes he understands somewhat of how the process works for humans, but perhaps not for dragonkind. He's read textbooks, but to actually live the experience? Different. Your face matches his light crimson, but you explain it to him. You admit that you don't have a mate, especially given dragons mate for life, but there a few aspects you do know about how it works:

There has to be some sort of long-lasting, pre-existing bond established for courting to begin.

One dragon, oftentimes the male, will attempt to make an impressive display, often of power, towards the other to demonstrate his readiness and ability to sustain such a bond. Neuvillette unknowingly, whilst with you on a walk outside of the court of Fontaine, insists you stay behind him as he power washes handles a group of Treasure Hoarders harassing a Sumerian scholar attempting to repair her boat. His manner of handling them was a tad more… extreme than you expected, and he seems apologetic for losing his restraint. Neuvillette admits quietly he's unsure what came over him.

Dragons exchange gifts and may perhaps begin to build their nest with said gifts. You notice in the corner of your bedroom, a suspicious pile beginning to grow of gifts - ribbons, seashells, gems, clothing - that Neuvillette has given you. Neuvillette, on a late night filled with interminable paperwork, looks up with astonishment upon realizing how messy his typically orderly office has become. Whilst he's always sure to keep your gifts in a safe location, as they mean very much to him, he notices how they have sort of been gathering in a pile… Neuvillette feels distracted by how unkept he has seemingly become, and wonders if something has come over him.

Dragons may attempt to mark their potential mate to warn others away, and may get jealous if their courting partner is pursued by another. Neuvillette, one day, with the encouragement of the Melusines, decides to craft a necklace with a small scallop shell at the end. He gives it to you, quietly proud of his work, and seems to hold his breath when you ask it to clasp it around your neck. Now, he notices how you wear it everywhere, often fidgeting with it or telling other Melusines with joy that Monsieur Neuvillette crafted this just for you!

One day, however, a merchant notices the shimmering shell and compliments it, though he seems to be more so complimenting its wearer. Neuvillette is not far away, discussing reports with nearby Marechaussee Phantom members. He cannot seem to pay attention to the conversation at hand, and instead feels an intense tension in his jaw, a broiling distaste and unpleasant sensation in his chest. He apologizes profusely to the Melusine with which he converses and turns to the conversation that is louder than anything else in the area. Neuvillette notices how the fellow attempts to reach out and touch your collarbone where the necklace resides, and the Iudex interrupts with the sort of calmness he only possesses when he is wordlessly angry, to step away from you. The merchant stammers an apology and scatters elsewhere within moments.

Dragons become fiercely protective over their mates. After this has occurred, Neuvillette fusses over you. He scans you from head to toe, asking if you are okay. You reassure him that the merchant had just then tried to reach out, and that you had plans to stop him before he could. He insists that you should have called him over sooner if you were uncomfortable, and you admit you had no idea that he was even here and that you could've handled yourself.

The days that follow, Neuvillette finds it difficult to let you out of his sight. Your meetings drag on (haha) longer, he walks you home, he asks if you have had enough water, if you are taking care of yourself, physically and mentally. You find yourself reciprocating for a reason that initially evades you, insisting he not work so late into the night so he can rest, that he take a day or two off.

When it pours, you come to comfort and console him. How strange and wonderful it feels all at once to have another standing next to him as the rain covers the city. He cannot quite put to words what it means for you to stand there with him, nor the warmth it brings to him. You feel the very same, in despite the chill of the rain cooling your skin, you have never felt so warm.

It is only a month or so later that the two of you, at separate moments, realize that you have been courting the other. Neuvillette, though flustered, cannot deny the fact. You accept it just as well, but know there is one step left - to seal that which you have shared, if you so wish.

Dragons will share a flight to seal their companionship.

At this point, you and Neuvillette have more explicitly been going on dates together. He has been explicit in asking you on them, as have you, and they have all been wonderful - to be honest, these "dates" are not any different than your weekly meetings shared in his office, on walks within or outside the Court of Fontaine, or at cafes, but now there is a romantic subtext you both have acknowledged.

Neuvillette is shy to initiate physical touch. But one walk, you, with a pounding heart and rosy cheeks, ask if you can hold his hand. Breath catching, he nods, and your fingers playfully brush his before slipping between his gloved ones. He squeezes your hand.

He grows more relaxed at this. This turns into playful knee bumps when sitting together, to fixing each other's hair, to hugs that linger longer than either of you wish to admit, to kisses on the forehead, cheek, and eventually, to the lips. Neuvillette always kisses your forehead when you go to leave from his office, and pleads for you to be safe in that soft and desperate but low voice only you get to hear.

It is nearing the end of summer when Neuvillette admits that he is ready to show you his full form. You meet by the coast, far from any prying eyes, beneath the nocturnal sky blanketed by glimmering stars. Neuvillette, wearing solely a white dress shirt whose sleeves are rolled up to his elbows, black slacks, and no shoes, seems to pace back and forth on the sand. You cannot help but smile at his nervousness - it's endearing, but you understand. You also spy the pearly and deep scales littering his arms and hand that have always been hidden beneath his judicial robes.

When you greet and reassure him, it isn't long until you show yourselves fully to each other. You transform into your draconic form first to inspire confidence within him, your scales and fins unfurling, towering far above him, your rhinophores glowing in the darkness of the evening. You playfully nudge him with your snout.

When Neuvillette takes on his form, it is graceful and far more majestic than you ever imagined. He is the Hydro Sovereign, after all. The Iudex, no, the Hydro Sovereign towers even above you, azure scales gleaming beneath the moonlight, his fins glowing cerulean and aquamarine not so unlike the rhinophores on his head, which are now far longer. A grand white mane sits atop his head, travelling not only around his chest, but in a thin line down his spine, curling into his tail. Violet eyes with sharp slits purposefully avoiding your gaze, you rumble with delight and nudge your snout against his own.

It's then that he finally works up the courage to look at you. Neuvillette lets out a small rumble of returned satisfaction, nuzzling his snout against your own. You trill as you nod towards the water, your snake-like figure disappearing gracefully beneath the waves. Neuvillette's huff of a laugh follows as he dives after you.

The two of you glide through the ocean waters for what feels like hours. The cool ocean current glides past you as you race over coral, beneath arches, between sunken ships, through schools of fish. Neuvillette is far faster than you anticipated, and while you were nearly as fast as him, he ultimately beats your speed, but encourages you playfully that you can catch up next time.

As you swim, you swim spirals around the other, your form coiling around Neuvillette's playfully. He too darts beneath you, bumping you teasingly, before meeting you side by side, as you finish your swim at an even pace.

Returning to shore, you collapse with pleasant exhaustion from your swim. Neuvillette exhales with matched exhaustion, but he lies beside you, head resting atop your neck, tail entangled with your own. He thanks you for everything, and quietly professes his love. You return said admission, thanking him for helping you to feel not so alone in this complicated world.

With that, the two of you become mates :)

Some actual headcanons because I started writing them, and then it devolved(?) into an imagine/oneshot:

Neuvillette obviously feels free to be his full draconic self around you. This includes being a bit clingier than he would like to admit (he feels embarrassed about it, but you reassure him there's nothing to feel embarrassed about). He adores holding your hand, hugging you, holding you whilst you lounge or rest together. He finds that he does not want to be without you, and often tries to be as close to you as he can manage.

Mutual fussing over each other. You like to help him get ready every morning, including helping him brush out that massive head of hair and either tying it into its usual low ponytail or braiding it. You also delicately clip his usual accessories to his hair, just above his ear, making sure they're just right. He will gladly exchange the favor and help you with your own hair. Neuvillette adores brushing strands of hair from your forehead, fixing your collar or sleeve cuffs, or making sure you're warm enough. He will very happily give you his jacket at any moment's notice - the sight of you wearing his clothes is enough to make him melt.

Shared care of your draconic forms. Now that you're together, you don't mind helping to massage the area around his rhinophores that have the tendency to grow sore, and he returns the favor to you. You also help each other clean your scales, which is particularly helpful for those hard to reach places.

You definitely have some sort of a shared nest now :) It's a collection of items from your two separate nests (that you were both subconsciously creating) merged into one. In that way, it's a sweet reminder of your time spent together.

You often go on nightly swims in your dragon forms. You're careful not to get spotted. Afterwards, you almost always curl up with the other and reflect on your lives. You often drift asleep due to the lulling melody of Neuvillette's voice (a blessing and a curse), and Neuvillette must decide each time whether to bring the two of you somewhere safer or to let you rest there.

Regardless, Neuvillette is very smitten with you and you with him. He's so happy, after centuries, to have finally found someone like him, with whom he is free to be himself.

Segment 8 was the first who sought you out. A little boy with striking eyes, always glancing around like he expected danger to emerge from the shadows. Knowing his later selves perhaps that idea wasn't too far-fetched. Hands that were far too small to bear the weight of future deeds had reached for the blue vial hanging from his ear.

"Tongue out," he'd said while you stared with wide eyes. The top of the vial had been popped off.

You'd always figured the earrings were an aesthetic choice. You should've known better.

The youngest segment had tugged on your hand insistently (the touch itself surprising) while hurriedly urging you to kneel down. You'd smacked at his hand while he tried to pry your lips apart, any frustration with him gone the moment you saw the petulant pout on his lips when you didn't oblige.

"It's good for humans. Just a few drops so no one notices.." You'd seen the hesitation in his eyes before he softly added 'do it for me?'

It swiftly became routine. Every few weeks, the little 'boy' would bring appear out of thin air and clasp your hand tightly, dragging you into a corner of the laboratory where he'd feed you a little bit of what you came to learn was an elixir of immortality.

Segment 25 was the second to offer you this boon of their research. Perhaps you shouldn't have been as surprised as you'd been, 25 had always been the most forward.

He'd cornered you one day just before you'd retired for the night, exhausted after a long day of maintaining equipment and preparing various experiments for them.

Gloved fingers had squished your cheeks together before you could do as much as ask what he wanted. That usual feral grin on his lips bared the sharp teeth of a predator.

When you hadn't tried to fight him, he'd cooed and praised you although surprise had been clear.

"You really trust me this much? I'm flattered." You'd been released with a pat on your cheek before he put the earring back on. "Consider this a little gift, one the others don't want you to have. It will keep you young, and you will keep me company."

There'd been no uncertainty within him, only pure confidence that he knew what you wanted. Or knew that you would be too afraid to argue with a harbinger.

It only took a week or so before segment 18 appeared uninvited in the doorway to your private chamber. He'd refused to look at you while expaning the purpose of his visit, the contents of the vial they all carried, and what he expected in return for this favor.

For all the severity in his crimson eyes, the 'demands' were so tame you'd almost laughed. An attentive listener when he rambled on about his ideas. The so called privilege of resting his head atop your thighs and having you comb your fingers through his hair.

18 looked like he wanted to slip through the cracks of the floor while he listed what he wanted in exchange for 'wasting resources keeping you alive' as he'd put it. There'd been particular emphasis on how the rest of the segments did not want the precious drops wasted on some lowly assistant like you. It had taken all your composure not to chuckle at that.

45 and 65 had appeared together. The older looming as 45 explained their awareness of what 'the youngsters' had been doing. They both found it quite amusing how the three had been trying to cover their tracks. Elixir disappearing (to refill what they gave you from their vials). Their sneaking around. The furious and harebrained arguments they'd make when questioned.

But, as 45 had said, what the three had been independently giving you was only enough to stagnate the aging process, not halt it completely.

While your attention had been focused on 45, the older one had moved, making his presence known with the touch of his beaked mask nuzzling against your cheek from behind.

"Which is why 45 and I decided to step in. You see, we have grown quite fond of you as well."

"Of course," 45 had chimed in, "we expect a little more in return than innocent pecks on our cheeks and hugs. We're certain you understand."

Omega had, unsurprisingly, been the last to approach you.

"You've not aged a day in decades. I've been willing to turn a blind eye since you're useful. Don't you think that deserves special thanks?"

Masterlist

soft dom!thoma is the absolute sweetest in bed — he’s always checking up on you in any way that he can. asking if it’s too much, or if he needs to slow down for you — it’s so important to him that your comfort is ensured first and foremost!

soft dom!thoma who is not exactly all that freaked out- relatively vanilla i would say, but asks for you to give him a safe word anyway in case of anything. just as a safety precaution!

soft dom!thoma who likes having you ride him instead, holding your hips ever so tenderly while you go down on his cock either at your pace or his, if you’re too tired or stimulated to do the grinding.

soft dom!thoma who prioritizes your release over his own- like yeah of course he wants to cum, but after you’re good and taken care of. he gets off more to pleasing you — i mean he’s a giving, serviceable kinda guy, y’know?

soft dom!thoma who is the absolute best at aftercare — he runs the bath for you guys, brings you water, maybe a small plate of fruit or cookies if you need to snack on something afterwards. sometimes he also lights a candle or drops some essential oils into the water for aromatherapy<3

soft dom!thoma that is always there to kiss your scars, blemishes, or any parts of you that you ever feel insecure about. your body is beautiful- every part of you is precious to him, and he will make sure that you know of that.

soft dom!thoma that can’t say no to you in the shower when you look at him so pleadingly to have him take you in there. if you’re gonna look at him that way, how can he possibly refuse you?

soft dom!thoma who aways asks if anything is okay and what he’s allowed to say or touch. consent is important to him, and he never wants to cross any lines that bring you discomfort. so he’s always asking for permission, and even if you tell him that he doesn’t have to, he still will.

soft dom!thoma that always showers you in praises, telling you how good you’re doing and how wonderful you’re making him feel<3 it’s a crime if you don’t know what you do to him, man.. this guy is so in love with you..

soft dom!thoma who holds you in certain positions as if you weigh absolutely nothing to him, and if you’re unable to walk by the end of it — best believe he’s already carrying you anywhere that you need to go.

soft dom!thoma who is supposed to be cleaning you up in the tub after a particularly heated session, but it ends up being a second part once you press against him with a needy noise.

soft dom!thoma that waits for you to fall asleep first in his arms before following shortly after. he just loves to see you so gentle and relaxed — or if you look goofy while you’re asleep, he also really loves to see that too<3 you’re adorable and precious to him nonetheless.

notes. ack!! mb for the delay! this is my first time writing thoma so i hope he isn’t too ooc and that this was able to be of comfort<3 ty for the ask!

tysm for reading! consider leaving a tip if you enjoyed<3

phantom claws almost seem to cling to your skin- sliding from the curve of your shoulders to your nape and back in a chilling caress. one that made you consider scrubbing yourself with soap for a second or third time in the last twenty-four hours.

honestly, it felt like it should have been something insignificant — it wasn’t as if it had turned into something deeper and harder to erase from your memory.. but it if it continued to linger at the back of your head, then maybe it really was worth addressing.

but with the amount of paperwork you had missed out on filing to go on a date, there was hardly any time to be dwelling. the second of the fatui harbingers had been expecting these files for two days now, and if he was to go searching to find that they did not exist.. well, you didn’t want to find out whether or not you would be coming into work the next day.

let alone if you would be alive to tell that story.

maybe you would be. for whatever reason, the doctor was not too harsh with you. sure, he did not hold back from tasking you with practically everything menial and ultimately mundane, but if it was not pressing- he was.. somewhat lenient, and patient.

something to do with having lived so long, perhaps. however, you still did not want to abuse that leniency.

even if you didn’t see yourself finishing these files any time soon today.

lowering the stack of reports in your hands, you found yourself reaching for your shoulders for maybe the twenty-ninth time already since starting your day, and squeezed.

it felt silly — and if the seafoam haired male was to enter through the door right now.. you were sure to hear a mouthful. something about hiring an assistant not a masseuse — certainly if they were working away at their own muscle tension — or perhaps he might fuss in the way a doctor would.

either way, this.. wasn’t a conversation to be had with him. you felt ashamed to discuss it, embarrassed even, and dottore was sure to tell you the same things you had been trying to tell yourself this past day. possibly a little more clinically, as he didn’t really bother with lingering on these sorts of things.

which was maybe how you should be handling this, so perhaps his own opinion would be helpful at this moment to silence your pondering.

but it wasn’t as if you were intending to ask. it would be too insignificant to ask him to say, not to mention random, and certainly quite.. childish.

forcing your hands away when crescents had unknowingly begun to appear in your clothing, you returned them to the papers you had placed down, wishing they would still. shaky penmanship was the last thing you needed, not to mention crinkled files from how hard you were grasping the sides.

the doctor liked his work prim and clean, stored as neatly as possible for him to return to if he ever needed anything from them.

so it was best to be meticulous with them- although that.. became increasingly harder to accomplish.

and as if fate had wanted to drive the final nail into the coffin, there was the doctor himself.

waiting expectantly for the papers that should have been filed yesterday.

“lord harbinger,” you quickly greeted, dropping the reports from your hands to rise from your place. “i wasn’t expecting your visit- i would have brewed some tea, if so..” you followed up, lowering your head into a bow. “how.. might i be of assistance to you?”

a hum seemed to leave said male’s lips as he approached your desk, splaying his leather-clad fingers across the scattered sheets of his writings. “no need, my dear.. unless you might have something capable of jogging memories.” he spoke up, returning his hand behind him. “the monthly expenses the regrator sent for were meant to be completed on my desk by this morning.” he continued, glancing over at the wall before returning his masked gaze to you. “not that anyone is keeping count, but it is currently midday.” past his near nonexistent lunch time.

your heart just about dropped to your stomach as your eyes widened, hairs raising beneath the fabric of your clothing.

right. that was something you were meant to do, but with the date weighing heavily on your mind — you had run out of the lab with a mental reminder to address it later.

something which you.. obviously did not do, considering the swarm of thoughts that had fogged your brain after said date.

perhaps it might have been for the better to have ditched, if only to avoid the discomfort gained from it, and the festering anxiety at the possibility of losing your job or quite possibly meeting your demise. the doctor was.. not the kindest, anyway — polite, tolerant and patient, yes. but when it came to his work.. different story.

your eyes squeezed shut as you gripped the fabric of your clothing, willing your body to cease its trembling. “forgive my actions, lord harbinger — nothing i say will be a worthy enough excuse.. but please, allow me to make it up to you in any way that i can.” you tried offering, ignoring the lump lodging itself in your throat. “i’ll finish it right away- deliver a letter of condolences, a box of pastries from the marketplace- take on any extra work you have — anything! just, please..” a breath spilled from your lips, tears clinging to your lashes. “please allow me to continue working here — you have my word going onwards that this will never happen again, and that i will continue to deliver the results required of me..”

“just please let me stay.” you almost wanted to add, but you knew you shouldn’t. it was.. ultimately his choice on what he wanted to do with you, and at the end of the day — the word of a harbinger was above your own, certainly the second.

you only prayed he would understand, as that was all you could really do now. you’d offered everything that you could have, anyway, now the ball was.. frighteningly within his court.

silence befell your humble office, and for all of three suffocating beats spent awaiting his verdict, dottore let out a soft, contemplative noise. “now i am curious, what is this excuse that is not worthy enough to run by me, my dear?”

lifting your head to meet his mask gaze, slightly closer than it had been before, your lips parted in shock before they closed, eyes flitting elsewhere — anywhere other than your boss. why would he possibly want to know? moreover, what would he even say to the fact that your romantic life ( if it could even be called that now ) took precedence over his finances?

still, he had you cornered in your office, and lying would only paint a worse picture of yourself.

so your gaze returned to him, chapped appendages separating once more. “i.. had a date, i suppose,” you began freeing a hand from your attire to cradle your arm. “but it.. didn’t go very well, and i guess i shut down a little once i took my leave..” saying it aloud felt almost pathetic, especially when you were telling one of the most fearsome harbingers of them all — comparable to the powers of the divine. but said harbinger just seemed to wait in silence, offering up his full, undivided attention.

by the gods, you did not deserve his kindness.

squeezing your arm, you shook your head, letting out a breath to recompose yourself. there were still a few details that needed mentioning, after all. “i.. know romance is not exactly a topic that comes up around here, but if i might be permitted to ask, lord harbinger,” you glanced up at him, willing your voice not to waver. “is.. physicality typically involved on the first date?”

if there was a shift in expression beneath the mask, you could not quite see or pick up on it, but the air almost seemed to change. whether in anger at doing something as foolish as to go on a date when there were more pressing matters — far above your personal life, or.. something you could not quite discern.

either way, the atmosphere was.. not what it previously was, and you weren’t sure if that was an improvement, or something far worse.

you considered adding something — to fill the silence or better explain yourself, but by the time your mouth opened, dottore was already speaking.

“physical affection, unless discussed beforehand and explicitly permitted, does not often take place on the first date.” he finally answered, measured and clinical. “i’m not entirely sure which boundaries you may have established or not established, but having one’s hands on you without consent as a standard to relationships is not normal.”

stiffening in your place, the phantom tendrils seemed to drag themselves from the peak of your shoulders down along the blades, and it took all of you not to cover them with your hands — if only to replace the feeling. your employer didn’t need to see that- he didn’t need to see you so pathetic, and yet..

“oh, dear..” he spoke up a little quieter this time, reaching into his coat to pull out a neatly folded handkerchief as he held it to your teary eyes. “it must have been immensely terrible to have made you react in such a way..” he added softly, uncharacteristically tender, just as the gentle press of the silky fabric had been to the apples of your cheeks.

unable to stop yourself from sniffling once his voice had come out so sympathetically, you allowed your tears to spill freely, bringing a hand to grip the fibers over your chest. “i-i’m so sorry — i should have been more clear- or i shouldn’t have even gone.” you sobbed out, trembling in your place with only the softness against your eyes to ground you from the spiral of thoughts you’d been stuck in since the date had ended. “i.. i didn’t think it needed to be said — i put my trust into them so blindly, and in turn, i just-”

“hush now, dear.” the doctor cut in without bite, pulling away to wipe at your opposite eye. “your decision was immensely careless, naive, and foolish altogether.. but you cannot be faulted for an occurrence you had no way of foreseeing.” he continued, lowering his hand to hold out the cloth for you to take. “your actions will not be punished, nor will i let you go — since that was your main concern — however,” a pause, and then a low sigh. “you must know to establish boundaries going forward, as to avoid situations like.. these.” certainly with individuals that were experiencing romantic arrangements for the first time.

which was applicable to your current case, but nonetheless shocking to hear coming from the second harbinger of all people.

taking the handkerchief with tentative fingers, you wiped at your cheeks and eyes a final time for yourself, letting out another sniffle as your head lowered. “i’ll.. do better,” you vowed, stilling the azure cloth to meet his masked gaze. “thank you for being so understanding, lord harbinger. you didn’t have to be, and.. yet you were.”

he scoffed lightly at the apology, but he didn’t seem put off in any way, merely plucking the cloth when it was held out to him before slipping it back into his coat. “i would hope so. if given other circumstances i would have reacted much differently.” crueler. “but a case like this needs to be treated.. delicately. so i leave you with a parting advice to bring your preferences across, even if you deem them unnecessary.”

that seemed reasonable enough. not entirely impossible, and within your abilities.

you nodded slowly, mustering a small smile. “you have my word, lord harbinger.. for the rest- i will do my best to have the work on your desk as soon as i can, but um- if i might be so bold.. could i ask something of you?”

amused, dottore tilted his head, folding his arms across his chest. “a favor after i let you off the hook so easily? how bold.” he hummed out, stepping forward. “well then, what is it, my dear?” a raise? a longer vacation? less hours?

sucking in a breath and expelling it, you moved in front of your desk to be directly in front of him, parting your lips carefully. “i’d.. like for you to touch me, lord harbinger.” you spoke up, willing your voice steady itself. “here- on the shoulders.”

the doctor blinked once and then twice before his gaze fell to your shoulders and then your face. was this meant to be a test? “are you entirely certain that you want that?” most would be repulsed, after all, having been previously touched in a way they did not want.

but you only nodded your head, meeting his gaze with full confidence. “i’m certain. please, lord harbinger, if you would..”

and because he wanted to find out for himself what you were intending to prove, he brought his leather-clad hands to your shoulders — resting them there. “any different?”

closing your eyes as the tension seeped out just slightly, you found your head tipping forward in agreement, lips pressing into a small smile. “significantly.. thank you, lord harbinger.”

notes. sorry if dottie is a little outta character here aksjskc just wanted to be comforted so this may have been rather self indulgent in that regard.. but anyway, be sure to always establish boundaries even if you think you don’t have to- it’s always good to do so.

tysm for reading! consider leaving a tip if you enjoyed<3

phantom claws almost seem to cling to your skin- sliding from the curve of your shoulders to your nape and back in a chilling caress. one that made you consider scrubbing yourself with soap for a second or third time in the last twenty-four hours.

honestly, it felt like it should have been something insignificant — it wasn’t as if it had turned into something deeper and harder to erase from your memory.. but it if it continued to linger at the back of your head, then maybe it really was worth addressing.

but with the amount of paperwork you had missed out on filing to go on a date, there was hardly any time to be dwelling. the second of the fatui harbingers had been expecting these files for two days now, and if he was to go searching to find that they did not exist.. well, you didn’t want to find out whether or not you would be coming into work the next day.

let alone if you would be alive to tell that story.

maybe you would be. for whatever reason, the doctor was not too harsh with you. sure, he did not hold back from tasking you with practically everything menial and ultimately mundane, but if it was not pressing- he was.. somewhat lenient, and patient.

something to do with having lived so long, perhaps. however, you still did not want to abuse that leniency.

even if you didn’t see yourself finishing these files any time soon today.

lowering the stack of reports in your hands, you found yourself reaching for your shoulders for maybe the twenty-ninth time already since starting your day, and squeezed.

it felt silly — and if the seafoam haired male was to enter through the door right now.. you were sure to hear a mouthful. something about hiring an assistant not a masseuse — certainly if they were working away at their own muscle tension — or perhaps he might fuss in the way a doctor would.

either way, this.. wasn’t a conversation to be had with him. you felt ashamed to discuss it, embarrassed even, and dottore was sure to tell you the same things you had been trying to tell yourself this past day. possibly a little more clinically, as he didn’t really bother with lingering on these sorts of things.

which was maybe how you should be handling this, so perhaps his own opinion would be helpful at this moment to silence your pondering.

but it wasn’t as if you were intending to ask. it would be too insignificant to ask him to say, not to mention random, and certainly quite.. childish.

forcing your hands away when crescents had unknowingly begun to appear in your clothing, you returned them to the papers you had placed down, wishing they would still. shaky penmanship was the last thing you needed, not to mention crinkled files from how hard you were grasping the sides.

the doctor liked his work prim and clean, stored as neatly as possible for him to return to if he ever needed anything from them.

so it was best to be meticulous with them- although that.. became increasingly harder to accomplish.

and as if fate had wanted to drive the final nail into the coffin, there was the doctor himself.

waiting expectantly for the papers that should have been filed yesterday.

“lord harbinger,” you quickly greeted, dropping the reports from your hands to rise from your place. “i wasn’t expecting your visit- i would have brewed some tea, if so..” you followed up, lowering your head into a bow. “how.. might i be of assistance to you?”

a hum seemed to leave said male’s lips as he approached your desk, splaying his leather-clad fingers across the scattered sheets of his writings. “no need, my dear.. unless you might have something capable of jogging memories.” he spoke up, returning his hand behind him. “the monthly expenses the regrator sent for were meant to be completed on my desk by this morning.” he continued, glancing over at the wall before returning his masked gaze to you. “not that anyone is keeping count, but it is currently midday.” past his near nonexistent lunch time.

your heart just about dropped to your stomach as your eyes widened, hairs raising beneath the fabric of your clothing.

right. that was something you were meant to do, but with the date weighing heavily on your mind — you had run out of the lab with a mental reminder to address it later.

something which you.. obviously did not do, considering the swarm of thoughts that had fogged your brain after said date.

perhaps it might have been for the better to have ditched, if only to avoid the discomfort gained from it, and the festering anxiety at the possibility of losing your job or quite possibly meeting your demise. the doctor was.. not the kindest, anyway — polite, tolerant and patient, yes. but when it came to his work.. different story.

your eyes squeezed shut as you gripped the fabric of your clothing, willing your body to cease its trembling. “forgive my actions, lord harbinger — nothing i say will be a worthy enough excuse.. but please, allow me to make it up to you in any way that i can.” you tried offering, ignoring the lump lodging itself in your throat. “i’ll finish it right away- deliver a letter of condolences, a box of pastries from the marketplace- take on any extra work you have — anything! just, please..” a breath spilled from your lips, tears clinging to your lashes. “please allow me to continue working here — you have my word going onwards that this will never happen again, and that i will continue to deliver the results required of me..”

“just please let me stay.” you almost wanted to add, but you knew you shouldn’t. it was.. ultimately his choice on what he wanted to do with you, and at the end of the day — the word of a harbinger was above your own, certainly the second.

you only prayed he would understand, as that was all you could really do now. you’d offered everything that you could have, anyway, now the ball was.. frighteningly within his court.

silence befell your humble office, and for all of three suffocating beats spent awaiting his verdict, dottore let out a soft, contemplative noise. “now i am curious, what is this excuse that is not worthy enough to run by me, my dear?”

lifting your head to meet his mask gaze, slightly closer than it had been before, your lips parted in shock before they closed, eyes flitting elsewhere — anywhere other than your boss. why would he possibly want to know? moreover, what would he even say to the fact that your romantic life ( if it could even be called that now ) took precedence over his finances?

still, he had you cornered in your office, and lying would only paint a worse picture of yourself.

so your gaze returned to him, chapped appendages separating once more. “i.. had a date, i suppose,” you began freeing a hand from your attire to cradle your arm. “but it.. didn’t go very well, and i guess i shut down a little once i took my leave..” saying it aloud felt almost pathetic, especially when you were telling one of the most fearsome harbingers of them all — comparable to the powers of the divine. but said harbinger just seemed to wait in silence, offering up his full, undivided attention.

by the gods, you did not deserve his kindness.

squeezing your arm, you shook your head, letting out a breath to recompose yourself. there were still a few details that needed mentioning, after all. “i.. know romance is not exactly a topic that comes up around here, but if i might be permitted to ask, lord harbinger,” you glanced up at him, willing your voice not to waver. “is.. physicality typically involved on the first date?”

if there was a shift in expression beneath the mask, you could not quite see or pick up on it, but the air almost seemed to change. whether in anger at doing something as foolish as to go on a date when there were more pressing matters — far above your personal life, or.. something you could not quite discern.

either way, the atmosphere was.. not what it previously was, and you weren’t sure if that was an improvement, or something far worse.

you considered adding something — to fill the silence or better explain yourself, but by the time your mouth opened, dottore was already speaking.

“physical affection, unless discussed beforehand and explicitly permitted, does not often take place on the first date.” he finally answered, measured and clinical. “i’m not entirely sure which boundaries you may have established or not established, but having one’s hands on you without consent as a standard to relationships is not normal.”

stiffening in your place, the phantom tendrils seemed to drag themselves from the peak of your shoulders down along the blades, and it took all of you not to cover them with your hands — if only to replace the feeling. your employer didn’t need to see that- he didn’t need to see you so pathetic, and yet..

“oh, dear..” he spoke up a little quieter this time, reaching into his coat to pull out a neatly folded handkerchief as he held it to your teary eyes. “it must have been immensely terrible to have made you react in such a way..” he added softly, uncharacteristically tender, just as the gentle press of the silky fabric had been to the apples of your cheeks.

unable to stop yourself from sniffling once his voice had come out so sympathetically, you allowed your tears to spill freely, bringing a hand to grip the fibers over your chest. “i-i’m so sorry — i should have been more clear- or i shouldn’t have even gone.” you sobbed out, trembling in your place with only the softness against your eyes to ground you from the spiral of thoughts you’d been stuck in since the date had ended. “i.. i didn’t think it needed to be said — i put my trust into them so blindly, and in turn, i just-”

“hush now, dear.” the doctor cut in without bite, pulling away to wipe at your opposite eye. “your decision was immensely careless, naive, and foolish altogether.. but you cannot be faulted for an occurrence you had no way of foreseeing.” he continued, lowering his hand to hold out the cloth for you to take. “your actions will not be punished, nor will i let you go — since that was your main concern — however,” a pause, and then a low sigh. “you must know to establish boundaries going forward, as to avoid situations like.. these.” certainly with individuals that were experiencing romantic arrangements for the first time.

which was applicable to your current case, but nonetheless shocking to hear coming from the second harbinger of all people.

taking the handkerchief with tentative fingers, you wiped at your cheeks and eyes a final time for yourself, letting out another sniffle as your head lowered. “i’ll.. do better,” you vowed, stilling the azure cloth to meet his masked gaze. “thank you for being so understanding, lord harbinger. you didn’t have to be, and.. yet you were.”

he scoffed lightly at the apology, but he didn’t seem put off in any way, merely plucking the cloth when it was held out to him before slipping it back into his coat. “i would hope so. if given other circumstances i would have reacted much differently.” crueler. “but a case like this needs to be treated.. delicately. so i leave you with a parting advice to bring your preferences across, even if you deem them unnecessary.”

that seemed reasonable enough. not entirely impossible, and within your abilities.

you nodded slowly, mustering a small smile. “you have my word, lord harbinger.. for the rest- i will do my best to have the work on your desk as soon as i can, but um- if i might be so bold.. could i ask something of you?”

amused, dottore tilted his head, folding his arms across his chest. “a favor after i let you off the hook so easily? how bold.” he hummed out, stepping forward. “well then, what is it, my dear?” a raise? a longer vacation? less hours?

sucking in a breath and expelling it, you moved in front of your desk to be directly in front of him, parting your lips carefully. “i’d.. like for you to touch me, lord harbinger.” you spoke up, willing your voice steady itself. “here- on the shoulders.”

the doctor blinked once and then twice before his gaze fell to your shoulders and then your face. was this meant to be a test? “are you entirely certain that you want that?” most would be repulsed, after all, having been previously touched in a way they did not want.

but you only nodded your head, meeting his gaze with full confidence. “i’m certain. please, lord harbinger, if you would..”

and because he wanted to find out for himself what you were intending to prove, he brought his leather-clad hands to your shoulders — resting them there. “any different?”

closing your eyes as the tension seeped out just slightly, you found your head tipping forward in agreement, lips pressing into a small smile. “significantly.. thank you, lord harbinger.”

notes. sorry if dottie is a little outta character here aksjskc just wanted to be comforted so this may have been rather self indulgent in that regard.. but anyway, be sure to always establish boundaries even if you think you don’t have to- it’s always good to do so.

tysm for reading! consider leaving a tip if you enjoyed<3