as requested by @ambitionbled (it won’t let me tag you, sorry!)
âťťHow much have you had to drink?âťž
âťťYou could have fucking alcohol poisoning!âťž Â
âťťEasy, there. Try to sit up.âťž
❝I think I might’ve overdone it on the alcohol…❞
❝We’ve got to go get your stomach pumped.❞
âťťI thought you said you were clean!âťž
âťťYes, it is a big deal.âťž
âťťLet me drive you home.âťž
âťťYou are NOT driving like this!âťž
âťťYou are gonna have one hell of a hangover tomorrow.âťž
âťťDrinking until you puke is not normal.âťž
âťťIs this real life?âťžÂ
❝I want to go to sleep but I can’t find any sheep.❞
âťťHow do you show fish affection?âťž
âťťTaco Bell is open 24 hours, right?âťž
❝Tequila is not my friend? YOU’RE not my friend.❞
-glasses on head- âťťWhere did I put my glasses?âťž
âťťHow do I tell my parents I’m a mermaid?âťžÂ
❝I’m not even tired.❞
âťťI should call my ex.âťž
❝I’m not drunk enough for this.❞
âťťDoes playing Mario Kart drunk count as drunk driving?âťž
-hugging the floor- ❝I’m trying to stop the floor from spinning.❞
âťťCan we go out for fried chicken?âťž
❝What’s the fucking point anymore?❞
âťťScrew recovery. I want a drink.âťž
âťťI’m too sober for this shit.âťžÂ
❝I don’t give a shit what you think.❞
❝I seriously don’t feel too good.❞
❝I didn’t even have that much to drink.❞
âťťWill you stop fucking interrogating me?âťž
❝I can drive. I’m fine.❞
❝There’s a reason I drink so much.❞
❝You’re the reason I drink so much.❞
❝I’m only happy when I’m drunk.❞
âťťYou’re cute, you know that?âťžÂ
âťťYou wanna get wasted?âťž
❝I’m bar-hopping tonight, wanna come?❞
❝What are you drinking, and why aren’t you sharing?❞
❝I’m having a party for two.❞
❝I’m usually too chicken-shit to say this, but…I really like you.❞
❝I don’t want to kiss you with your alcohol breath.❞