How Would You Write The Song Of The Silverbird?

This is an excerpt from Chapter 5, Tale of Sun, which recounts the aftermath of one of Sun’s battle against the Crawlers. Sun and Moon were created to be the mortals’ champions against this inidentified evil they condensed into this vicious God… And so they cannot help but fight, and fight again, and fight anew: there will be no final victory for either side, because it was never included in the myths…

Tagging @create-and-procrastinate @aslaugblom @toboldlywrite @pheita @cog-writes @silverbird-scrive @lady-redshield-writes @thewriterandthestoryteller @dreamywritingdragon

Sun’s fire is dimmed, wide patches of dull white cover her illusion of a body, recounting the tale of the umpteenth useless battle – a map retracing the steps of a pain she will never show; as She floats just a few feet above the refined pavement of the Temple, eyes closed and expression neutral, so tightly controlled it just might snap, Moon frets around her.

She is so honest, so blunt, so transparent in her reactions and feelings that shimmer in the fading twilight as She carries her heart on her sleeve with pride. She touches non-existent hands to the wounds, sharing her energy and thoughts to heal her beloved faster, and even as everything in her countenance indicates anger and weariness, She is nothing if not gentle in her care. “You fought the Crawlers again,” She states flatly.

Beside her, Darkness watches, flicking his tail here and there. He’s the one and only being who understands the depth of the love they share, when for all the others – immortals and mortals alike – it is but a passing fancy, or a stubborn caprice. “Of course She did,” He answers, voice filled with humour and the smallest hint of reproach. “She had to.”

“I hate them,” Moon growls through clenched teeth, and Sun meets her worried stare with a tender look of her own. “I hate that they keep lashing out at you.”

by larae.net

Amazing- incredible, unbelievable, improbable, fabulous, wonderful, fantastic, astonishing, astounding, extraordinary

Anger- enrage, infuriate, arouse, nettle, exasperate, inflame, madden

Angry- mad, furious, enraged, excited, wrathful, indignant, exasperated, aroused, inflamed

Answer- reply, respond, retort, acknowledge

Ask- question, inquire of, seek information from, put a question to, demand, request, expect, inquire, query, interrogate, examine, quiz

Awful- dreadful, terrible, abominable, bad, poor, unpleasant

Bad- evil, immoral, wicked, corrupt, sinful, depraved, rotten, contaminated, spoiled, tainted, harmful, injurious, unfavorable, defective, inferior, imperfect, substandard, faulty, improper, inappropriate, unsuitable, disagreeable, unpleasant, cross, nasty, unfriendly, irascible, horrible, atrocious, outrageous, scandalous, infamous, wrong, noxious, sinister, putrid, snide, deplorable, dismal, gross, heinous, nefarious, base, obnoxious, detestable, despicable, contemptible, foul, rank, ghastly, execrable

Beautiful - pretty, lovely, handsome, attractive, gorgeous, dazzling, splendid, magnificent, comely, fair, ravishing, graceful, elegant, fine, exquisite, aesthetic, pleasing, shapely, delicate, stunning, glorious, heavenly, resplendent, radiant, glowing, blooming, sparkling

Begin - start, open, launch, initiate, commence, inaugurate, originate

Big - enormous, huge, immense, gigantic, vast, colossal, gargantuan, large, sizable, grand, great, tall, substantial, mammoth, astronomical, ample, broad, expansive, spacious, stout, tremendous, titanic, mountainous

Brave - courageous, fearless, dauntless, intrepid, plucky, daring, heroic, valorous, audacious, bold, gallant, valiant, doughty, mettlesome

Break - fracture, rupture, shatter, smash, wreck, crash, demolish, atomize

Bright - shining, shiny, gleaming, brilliant, sparkling, shimmering, radiant, vivid, colorful, lustrous, luminous, incandescent, intelligent, knowing, quick-witted, smart, intellectual

Calm - quiet, peaceful, still, tranquil, mild, serene, smooth, composed, collected, unruffled, level-headed, unexcited, detached, aloof

Come - approach, advance, near, arrive, reach

Cool - chilly, cold, frosty, wintry, icy, frigid

Crooked - bent, twisted, curved, hooked, zigzag

Cry - shout, yell, yowl, scream, roar, bellow, weep, wail, sob, bawl

Cut - gash, slash, prick, nick, sever, slice, carve, cleave, slit, chop, crop, lop, reduce

Dangerous - perilous, hazardous, risky, uncertain, unsafe

Dark - shadowy, unlit, murky, gloomy, dim, dusky, shaded, sunless, black, dismal, sad

Decide - determine, settle, choose, resolve

Definite - certain, sure, positive, determined, clear, distinct, obvious

Delicious - savory, delectable, appetizing, luscious, scrumptious, palatable, delightful, enjoyable, toothsome, exquisite

Describe - portray, characterize, picture, narrate, relate, recount, represent, report, record

Destroy - ruin, demolish, raze, waste, kill, slay, end, extinguish

Difference - disagreement, inequity, contrast, dissimilarity, incompatibility

Do - execute, enact, carry out, finish, conclude, effect, accomplish, achieve, attain

Dull - boring, tiring,, tiresome, uninteresting, slow, dumb, stupid, unimaginative, lifeless, dead, insensible, tedious, wearisome, listless, expressionless, plain, monotonous, humdrum, dreary

Eager - keen, fervent, enthusiastic, involved, interested, alive to

End - stop, finish, terminate, conclude, close, halt, cessation, discontinuance

Enjoy - appreciate, delight in, be pleased, indulge in, luxuriate in, bask in, relish, devour, savor, like

Explain - elaborate, clarify, define, interpret, justify, account for

Fair - just, impartial, unbiased, objective, unprejudiced, honest

Fall - drop, descend, plunge, topple, tumble

False - fake, fraudulent, counterfeit, spurious, untrue, unfounded, erroneous, deceptive, groundless, fallacious

Famous - well-known, renowned, celebrated, famed, eminent, illustrious, distinguished, noted, notorious

Fast - quick, rapid, speedy, fleet, hasty, snappy, mercurial, swiftly, rapidly, quickly, snappily, speedily, lickety-split, posthaste, hastily, expeditiously, like a flash

Fat - stout, corpulent, fleshy, beefy, paunchy, plump, full, rotund, tubby, pudgy, chubby, chunky, burly, bulky, elephantine

Fear - fright, dread, terror, alarm, dismay, anxiety, scare, awe, horror, panic, apprehension

Fly - soar, hover, flit, wing, flee, waft, glide, coast, skim, sail, cruise

Funny - humorous, amusing, droll, comic, comical, laughable, silly

Get - acquire, obtain, secure, procure, gain, fetch, find, score, accumulate, win, earn, rep, catch, net, bag, derive, collect, gather, glean, pick up, accept, come by, regain, salvage

Go - recede, depart, fade, disappear, move, travel, proceed

Good - excellent, fine, superior, wonderful, marvelous, qualified, suited, suitable, apt, proper, capable, generous, kindly, friendly, gracious, obliging, pleasant, agreeable, pleasurable, satisfactory, well-behaved, obedient, honorable, reliable, trustworthy, safe, favorable, profitable, advantageous, righteous, expedient, helpful, valid, genuine, ample, salubrious, estimable, beneficial, splendid, great, noble, worthy, first-rate, top-notch, grand, sterling, superb, respectable, edifying

Great - noteworthy, worthy, distinguished, remarkable, grand, considerable, powerful, much, mighty

Gross - improper, rude, coarse, indecent, crude, vulgar, outrageous, extreme, grievous, shameful, uncouth, obscene, low

Happy - pleased, contented, satisfied, delighted, elated, joyful, cheerful, ecstatic, jubilant, gay, tickled, gratified, glad, blissful, overjoyed

Hate - despise, loathe, detest, abhor, disfavor, dislike, disapprove, abominate

Have - hold, possess, own, contain, acquire, gain, maintain, believe, bear, beget, occupy, absorb, fill, enjoy

Help - aid, assist, support, encourage, back, wait on, attend, serve, relieve, succor, benefit, befriend, abet

Hide - conceal, cover, mask, cloak, camouflage, screen, shroud, veil

Hurry - rush, run, speed, race, hasten, urge, accelerate, bustle

Hurt - damage, harm, injure, wound, distress, afflict, pain

Idea - thought, concept, conception, notion, understanding, opinion, plan, view, belief

Important - necessary, vital, critical, indispensable, valuable, essential, significant, primary, principal, considerable, famous, distinguished, notable, well-known

Interesting - fascinating, engaging, sharp, keen, bright, intelligent, animated, spirited, attractive, inviting, intriguing, provocative, though-provoking, challenging, inspiring, involving, moving, titillating, tantalizing, exciting, entertaining, piquant, lively, racy, spicy, engrossing, absorbing, consuming, gripping, arresting, enthralling, spellbinding, curious, captivating, enchanting, bewitching, appealing

Keep - hold, retain, withhold, preserve, maintain, sustain, support

Kill - slay, execute, assassinate, murder, destroy, cancel, abolish

Lazy - indolent, slothful, idle, inactive, sluggish

Little - tiny, small, diminutive, shrimp, runt, miniature, puny, exiguous, dinky, cramped, limited, itsy-bitsy, microscopic, slight, petite, minute

Look - gaze, see, glance, watch, survey, study, seek, search for, peek, peep, glimpse, stare, contemplate, examine, gape, ogle, scrutinize, inspect, leer, behold, observe, view, witness, perceive, spy, sight, discover, notice, recognize, peer, eye, gawk, peruse, explore

Love - like, admire, esteem, fancy, care for, cherish, adore, treasure, worship, appreciate, savor

Make - create, originate, invent, beget, form, construct, design, fabricate, manufacture, produce, build, develop, do, effect, execute, compose, perform, accomplish, earn, gain, obtain, acquire, get

Mark - label, tag, price, ticket, impress, effect, trace, imprint, stamp, brand, sign, note, heed, notice, designate

Mischievous - prankish, playful, naughty, roguish, waggish, impish, sportive

Move - plod, go, creep, crawl, inch, poke, drag, toddle, shuffle, trot, dawdle, walk, traipse, mosey, jog, plug, trudge, slump, lumber, trail, lag, run, sprint, trip, bound, hotfoot, high-tail, streak, stride, tear, breeze, whisk, rush, dash, dart, bolt, fling, scamper, scurry, skedaddle, scoot, scuttle, scramble, race, chase, hasten, hurry, hump, gallop, lope, accelerate, stir, budge, travel, wander, roam, journey, trek, ride, spin, slip, glide, slide, slither, coast, flow, sail, saunter, hobble, amble, stagger, paddle, slouch, prance, straggle, meander, perambulate, waddle, wobble, pace, swagger, promenade, lunge

Moody - temperamental, changeable, short-tempered, glum, morose, sullen, mopish, irritable, testy, peevish, fretful, spiteful, sulky, touchy

Neat - clean, orderly, tidy, trim, dapper, natty, smart, elegant, well-organized, super, desirable, spruce, shipshape, well-kept, shapely

New - fresh, unique, original, unusual, novel, modern, current, recent

Old - feeble, frail, ancient, weak, aged, used, worn, dilapidated, ragged, faded, broken-down, former, old-fashioned, outmoded, passe, veteran, mature, venerable, primitive, traditional, archaic, conventional, customary, stale, musty, obsolete, extinct

Part - portion, share, piece, allotment, section, fraction, fragment

Place - space, area, spot, plot, region, location, situation, position, residence, dwelling, set, site, station, status, state

Plan - plot, scheme, design, draw, map, diagram, procedure, arrangement, intention, device, contrivance, method, way, blueprint

Popular - well-liked, approved, accepted, favorite, celebrated, common, current

Predicament - quandary, dilemma, pickle, problem, plight, spot, scrape, jam

Put - place, set, attach, establish, assign, keep, save, set aside, effect, achieve, do, build

Quiet - silent, still, soundless, mute, tranquil, peaceful, calm, restful

Right - correct, accurate, factual, true, good, just, honest, upright, lawful, moral, proper, suitable, apt, legal, fair

Run - race, speed, hurry, hasten, sprint, dash, rush, escape, elope, flee

Say/Tell - inform, notify, advise, relate, recount, narrate, explain, reveal, disclose, divulge, declare, command, order, bid, enlighten, instruct, insist, teach, train, direct, issue, remark, converse, speak, affirm, suppose, utter, negate, express, verbalize, voice, articulate, pronounce, deliver, convey, impart, assert, state, allege, mutter, mumble, whisper, sigh, exclaim, yell, sing, yelp, snarl, hiss, grunt, snort, roar, bellow, thunder, boom, scream, shriek, screech, squawk, whine, philosophize, stammer, stutter, lisp, drawl, jabber, protest, announce, swear, vow, content, assure, deny, dispute

Scared - afraid, frightened, alarmed, terrified, panicked, fearful, unnerved, insecure, timid, shy, skittish, jumpy, disquieted, worried, vexed, troubled, disturbed, horrified, terrorized, shocked, petrified, haunted, timorous, shrinking, tremulous, stupefied, paralyzed, stunned, apprehensive

Show - display, exhibit, present, note, point to, indicate, explain, reveal, prove, demonstrate, expose

Slow - unhurried, gradual, leisurely, late, behind, tedious, slack

Stop - cease, halt, stay, pause, discontinue, conclude, end, finish, quit

Story - tale, myth, legend, fable, yarn, account, narrative, chronicle, epic, sage, anecdote, record, memoir

Strange - odd, peculiar, unusual, unfamiliar, uncommon, queer, weird, outlandish, curious, unique, exclusive, irregular

Take - hold, catch, seize, grasp, win, capture, acquire, pick, choose, select, prefer, remove, steal, lift, rob, engage, bewitch, purchase, buy, retract, recall, assume, occupy, consume

Tell - disclose, reveal, show, expose, uncover, relate, narrate, inform, advise, explain, divulge, declare, command, order, bid, recount, repeat

Think - judge, deem, assume, believe, consider, contemplate, reflect, mediate

Trouble - distress, anguish, anxiety, worry, wretchedness, pain, danger, peril, disaster, grief, misfortune, difficulty, concern, pains, inconvenience, exertion, effort

True - accurate, right, proper, precise, exact, valid, genuine, real, actual, trusty, steady, loyal, dependable, sincere, staunch

Ugly - hideous, frightful, frightening, shocking, horrible, unpleasant, monstrous, terrifying, gross, grisly, ghastly, horrid, unsightly, plain, homely, evil, repulsive, repugnant, gruesome

Unhappy - miserable, uncomfortable, wretched, heart-broken, unfortunate, poor, downhearted, sorrowful, depressed, dejected, melancholy, glum, gloomy, dismal, discouraged, sad

Use - employ, utilize, exhaust, spend, expend, consume, exercise

Personality is the most important thing about your character.

So, whenever I see character sheets, most people just put a little paragraph for that section. If you’re struggling and don’t know what your character should say or do, what decisions they should make, I guarantee you that this is the problem.

You know your character’s name, age, race, sexuality, height, weight, eye color, hair color, their parents’ and siblings’ names. But these are not the things that truly matter about them.

Traits: 

pick traits that don’t necessarily go together. For example, someone who is controlling, aggressive and vain can also be generous, sensitive and soft-spoken. Characters need to have at least one flaw that really impacts how they interact with others. Positive traits can work as flaws, too. It is advised that you pick at least ten traits

people are complex, full of contradictions, and please forgive me if this makes anyone uncomfortable, but even bullies can be “nice” people. Anyone can be a “bad” person, even someone who is polite, kind, helpful or timid can also be narcissistic, annoying, inconsiderate and a liar. People are not just “evil” or “good”

Beliefs:

ideas or thoughts that your character has or thinks about the world, society, others or themselves, even without proof or evidence, or which may or may not be true. Beliefs can contradict their values, motives, self-image, etc. For example, the belief that they are an awesome and responsible person when their traits are lazy, irresponsible and shallow. Their self-image and any beliefs they have about themselves may or may not be similar/the same. They might have a poor self-image, but still believe they’re better than everybody else

Values:

what your character thinks is important. Usually influenced by beliefs, their self-image, their history, etc. Some values may contradict their beliefs, wants, traits, or even other values. For example, your character may value being respect, but one of their traits is disrespectful. It is advised you list at least two values, and know which one they value more. For example, your character values justice and family. Their sister tells them she just stole $200 from her teacher’s wallet. Do they tell on her, or do they let her keep the money: justice, or family? Either way, your character probably has some negative feelings, guilt, anger, etc., over betraying their other value

Motives:

what your character wants. It can be abstract or something tangible. For example, wanting to be adored or wanting that job to pay for their father’s medication. Motives can contradict their beliefs, traits, values, behavior, or even other motives. For example, your character may want to be a good person, but their traits are selfish, manipulative, and narcissistic. Motives can be long term or short term. Everyone has wants, whether they realize it or not. You can write “they don’t know what they want,” but you should know. It is advised that you list at least one abstract want

Recurring Feelings:

feelings that they have throughout most of their life. If you put them down as a trait, it is likely they are also recurring feelings. For example, depressed, lonely, happy, etc.

Self Image:

what the character thinks of themselves: their self-esteem. Some character are proud of themselves, others are ashamed of themselves, etc. They may think they are not good enough, or think they are the smartest person in the world. Their self-image can contradict their beliefs, traits, values, behavior, motives, etc. For example, if their self-image is poor, they can still be a cheerful or optimistic person. If they have a positive self-image, they can still be a depressed or negative person. How they picture themselves may or may not be true: maybe they think they’re a horrible person, when they are, in fact, very considerate, helpful, kind, generous, patient, etc. They still have flaws, but flaws don’t necessarily make you a terrible person

Behavior:

how the character’s traits, values, beliefs, self-image, etc., are outwardly displayed: how they act. For example, two characters may have the trait “angry” but they all probably express it differently. One character may be quiet and want to be left alone when they are angry, the other could become verbally aggressive. If your character is a liar, do they pause before lying, or do they suddenly speak very carefully when they normally don’t? Someone who is inconsiderate may have issues with boundaries or eat the last piece of pizza in the fridge when they knew it wasn’t theirs. Behavior is extremely important and it is advised you think long and hard about your character’s actions and what exactly it shows about them

Demeanor:

their general mood and disposition. Maybe they’re usually quiet, cheerful, moody, or irritable, etc.

Posture:

a secondary part of your character’s personality: not as important as everything else. It is advised you fill this out after. Posture is how the character carries themselves. For example, perhaps they swing their arms and keep their shoulders back while they walk, which seems to be the posture of a confident person, so when they sit, their legs are probably open. Another character may slump and have their arms folded when they’re sitting, and when they’re walking, perhaps they drag their feet and look at the ground

Speech Pattern:

a secondary part of your character’s personality: not as important as everything else. It is advised you fill this out after. Speech patterns can be words that your character uses frequently, if they speak clearly, what sort of grammar they use, if they have a wide vocabulary, a small vocabulary, if it’s sophisticated, crude, stammering, repeating themselves, etc. I personally don’t have a very wide vocabulary, if you could tell

Hobbies:

a secondary part of your character’s personality: not as important as everything else. It is advised you fill this out after. Hobbies can include things like drawing, writing, playing an instrument, collecting rocks, collecting tea cups, etc.

Quirks:

a secondary part of your character’s personality, not as important as everything else. It is advised you fill this out after. Quirks are behaviors that are unique to your character. For example, I personally always put my socks on inside out and check the ceiling for spiders a few times a day

Likes:

a secondary part of your character’s personality, not as important as everything else. It is advised you fill this out after. Likes and dislikes are usually connected to the rest of their personality, but not necessarily. For example, if your character likes to do other people’s homework, maybe it’s because they want to be appreciated

Dislikes:

a secondary part of your character’s personality, not as important as everything else. It is advised you fill this out after. Likes and dislikes can also contradict the rest of their personality. For example, maybe one of your character’s traits is dishonest, but they dislike liars

History:

your character’s past that has key events that influence and shape their beliefs, values, behavior, wants, self-image, etc. Events written down should imply or explain why they are the way they are. For example, if your character is distrustful, maybe they were lied to a lot by their parents when they were a child. Maybe they were in a relationship for twenty years and found out their partner was cheating on them the whole time. If their motive/want is to have positive attention, maybe their parents just didn’t praise them enough and focused too much on the negative

On Mental and Physical Disabilities or Illnesses

if your character experienced a trauma, it needs to have an affect on your character. Maybe they became more angry or impatient or critical of others. Maybe their beliefs on people changed to become “even bullies can be ‘nice’ people: anyone can be a ‘bad’ person”

people are not their illness or disability: it should not be their defining trait. I have health anxiety, but I’m still idealistic, lazy, considerate, impatient and occasionally spiteful; I still want to become an author; I still believe that people are generally good; I still value doing what make me feel comfortable; I still have a positive self-image; I’m still a person. You should fill out your character’s personality at least half-way before you even touch on the possibility of your character having a disability or illness

Generally everything about your character should connect, but hey, even twins that grew up in the same exact household have different personalities; they value different things, have different beliefs. Maybe one of them watched a movie that had a huge impact on them.

Not everything needs to be explained. Someone can be picky or fussy ever since they were little for no reason at all. Someone can be a negative person even if they grew up in a happy home.

I believe this is a thought out layout for making well-rounded OCs, antagonists and protagonists, whether they’re being created for a roleplay or for a book. This layout is also helpful for studying Canon Characters if you’re looking to accurately roleplay as them or write them in fanfiction or whatever.

I’m really excited to post this, so hopefully I didn’t miss anything important…

If you have any questions, feel free to send a message.

You write it like it’s normal to the characters and give bits of exposition to explain the background. 

Once they sat back downwith their drinks, the food on its way, he leaned back in the leather chairand let his gaze drift to the ceiling, the parallel wooden boards interlacedwith small lights. Gentle murmurs of conversation floated to his ears, topicsof the mundane to the weighted mixing into a steady background lull. The twopeople behind him talked about an assault on a creature nest just north ofthe city, and his friend perked up, the cup of tea halfway to her lips.

“Nobody was hurt, right?” one of them said.

“Yeah, but it delayed train passage for a few hours. Oneof the beasts apparently tunneled under the tracks and they had to make surethe ground above could hold.”

Beyondthe protected city, beyond the country and across the ocean was the the dimensional rift that ravaged the border of theother country, bleeding savage creatures into the land, air, and sea.Manyof the invaders didn’t survive, unable to adapt to the new world, butthroughout history some had spread across the globe, taking territories anduprooting people on animalistic whims.

First part of that example is perfectly “normal” of a scenario, and you can use that “normality” to ground readers for when you explain the “fantasy”. (Only, I’d use actual names instead of “the city” or “other country” to give it a more realistic feel.)

To actually come up with the ideas is an issue of creativity which I am definitely not qualified to teach in any way, but for the actual moments that require explaining the world, here’s How to World-Build Without Boring Your Readers.

For the most appealing parts… well, there’s no answer to that. You don’t write a story about a world, you write a story about a protagonist who happens to show readers that world. The “most appealing” or “important” aspects all depend on what kind of story you want to tell in the first place.

A fantasy romance story would require showing the reader how romance actually works in that world. What are the cultural implications? What are the consequences?

A sci-fi adventure story would require showing the reader new worlds (new to the characters anyway). What’s the climate? Are there aliens?

It’s not about what readers want to see, it’s about what your story needs to be explored. It’s about where the plot takes the characters (or the characters take the plot). Reader “wants” are why we divide books into genres, so there’s no general answer for what everyone wants.

Well, maybe everyone wants a well-developed world that makes enough sense for the story to have happened in the first place. A “good story”, if I dare use such a generic term. But I can’t give specifics for “most important” because it all depends on what you’re trying to write in the first place. 

In a world devastated by the soviet supervirus “Dawn”, Jackal is just trying his best to stay alive.  When he wakes up from a bandit raid on the ruins of I-5, survival means teaming up with bloodthirsty mercenary Viktor and explosives expert Nadege to make sure no one’s coming back to finish the job.  Survival is everything, regardless of what it takes.

Magenta’s goal is simple and absolute: revenge.  Having escaped from slavery, she wants nothing more than to make sure her captives get what they deserve.  If this means joining the Cascadian Army and dragging them into a turf war against her traffickers, so be it.  Lives are a price worth paying to enact justice.

Justice means nothing to Onyx.  Left mute from his time as a captive, all he wants is for his insides to match the silence of his screams.  Things are bleak.  Rumors of a cure for Dawn and the violence that follows only makes things bleaker.  Sometimes it seems like the only light left in the world is the one he makes, even if that means burning everything else with it.

Fire is all Oswald wants.  Armies are on the brink of war in the Cascades, bandits turn men into prey, and rumors of a cure are circulating and bringing thousands more souls with it.  Mutated populations, “Biotics”, have started to crawl out of their hovels to seek the for cure themselves.  The apocalypse is severely overrated.  This is the best time to be death itself.

Every time you see this post on your dashboard, stop what you’re doing and write one sentence in your current project.

It can be long. It can be short. It can be sad or happy or scary or silly. But write one sentence.

Every time I post something original, I’m blown away by the response. Again, I want to thank all of you for your kindness. Your feedback and encouragement have lit a creative spark in me. 

Now! I have another Resonant Frequency excerpt for you. Did I ever mention that Orbulon has some…special skills? No? Then how about I let Lev introduce those skills - both to you and Orbulon.

This is a very long excerpt, so make sure you have the time to read!

Tagging those who’ve interacted with/otherwise enjoyed previous excerpts: @aschenink, @taz-writes, @cog-writes, @oheoo, @folatefangirl, @toboldlywrite, @starlitesymphony, @raiswanson, @nonsensicalwritings, @homesteadhorner, @weaver-of-fantasies-and-fables, and @brynwrites.

Small warning for squirmy imagery.

Excerpt One | Excerpt Two | Excerpt Three | Excerpt Four | Excerpt Five | Meet the Eldritch Horror | Chapter One

Without further ado…

“All right, Lonnie!” Salvatore announced. “You next!”

“Oh!” Orbulon tilted his head. “Is that okay?”

“Sure!” said Eloisia. “You haven’t gone for a while.”

That was true. Orbulon liked jumping on the trampoline more than he did landing in the water. And watching just how happy the others were when they surfaced was much better than surfacing himself. Still, Orbulon bounced over to the side of the trampoline, waiting.

“We should head in after this,” said Vittoro. He ran a hand through his hair, an apologetic smile on his face. “I confess I’m very hungry.”

“There’s fish,” Melchiorre said.

Vittoro gave him a kiss on the forehead. “Lovely.”

“Aw. Fine,” said Salvatore. “Mel’s fish is best fish.”

Orbulon and Eloisia exchanged a brief glance. He tried to suppress the image of the knife sinking into bloodied silver flesh.

Then there simply wasn’t time to think about it. On Vittoro’s count, the others leapt up high as they could. They landed all at once – and Orbulon shot off the trampoline. For a moment, he flew backward through empty space, his stomach lurching up into his mouth.

“No, he couldn’t have always been like this. He didn’t even know what this was. Just that it didn’t hurt, not like before, even though it should have. Maybe he really was dying. Maybe this was what happened when you drowned.”

—is a fantastic line.

Also I absolutely love the way you wrote Lev, he seems to be such an interesting character with questionable morality and curious motives. Another highlight for me was the way you described Lonnie’s powers. It was equal parts horrifying and intriguing, which is how I’d imagine to feel if my body could do that.

Furthermore, writing the first time around is meant to suck. That’s what it’s there for. Don’t give up on something because you can’t get the wording right. Don’t put something down and never pick it up again because you keep making the same mistake. 

I’m an editor and I will keep working with you. That’s what we do.

So, in conclusion: DON’T GIVE UP BECAUSE YOU MAKE THE SAME MISTAKES. You’ll get better, there’s always draft two, there’s always tomorrow, there’s always an editing phase. Write your little hearts out dammit! 

@weaver-of-fantasies-and-fables asked me about this a little while ago, and I’ve been wanting to show off the giant weather monsters for a while now. Tagging a few more folks who might be interested: @cog-writes, @toboldlywrite, @aschenink, @brynwrites. So, without further ado, I present: Great Storms!

In A Nutshell

A Great Storm is a beast which has mild to severe control over some aspect of the weather. This control can range from making gusts of wind to manipulating hurricanes. The creatures themselves range in scale from hawk-sized to skyscraper-sized. Some say the largest ones lurk at the bottom of the sea.

Great Storms are technically not deities - but! The largest and most powerful among them were often worshiped as deities in the past.

Reproduction methods vary by Storm. If it’s a lot of little creatures in a swarm, then they do their little creatures swarming thing. Lots of Great Storms lay eggs, even the ones you might not expect to.

It’s when you get into the stronger Storms that the reproduction methods get a little…weird. If a human or other animal were to kill a Great Storm, they would immediately and permanently become that Storm. For that reason, weatherists will only engage a Great Storm in active combat when absolutely necessary. It’s their very last resort. 

Also! When a Great Storm is about to die, they’ll often seek out a place where lots of other animals live. After they die, the first creature to make skin-to-skin contact with its body will become the Storm.

Scio and Sunon: First meeting; excerpt from Chapter 1, Deadly Violations

I thought I’d share this! It’s the very first scene that came to my mind, and what inspired me to write this novel! 

For a suspended moment, Ri’sal and her Shorin stared at one another. Those eyes, those eyes were so haunting and lost and yet full of wonder. There was a pull to her that made the warrior wish to sink into her, melt against her warmth, rest until the universe came to an end… It seemed as though the Prophet was about to speak, but Scio did not let her: she dropped to her knees and curved her back until her nose nearly touched cold marble.

“I have sinned,” she proclaimed, studying her own pale reflection and thinking it was a poor substitute for the brightness that had enveloped her when she had glanced at the Seer. “I am unworthy of your presence and your light. Please know that my only interest is that you survive, Ri’sal.”

Questions for developing the biology of a new species or race

Something to remember when developing your new species or races: always remember that your unique race/alien race should not distract from the narrative. It is always fun to experience new and different peoples that can be so similar to humanity while being so different. But you don’t want to create a main species that is so utterly alien that it distracts from your narrative. The details of your race should enhance your story, not needlessly complicate it.

So! With that in mind…

Starting from scratch:

What about them says “other”?

How are their environmental conditions reflected in their biology?

What texture/color is their skin or outer layer? Why?

Do they have hair? If so, where and what color(s)? What texture(s)?

How many biological sexes are there? How many genders?

How many cones do their eyes have?

How many limbs do they have? How are they used?

How many fingers/toes do they have? How has this altered their number system?

Were they the only race on their home planet that evolved to “intelligent?”

For further development:

How would it describe its setting?

Do they have physical traits specific to their class or caste?

What traits do others of their species find attractive? Why?

Do they use special tools to enhance or repair damaged/failing physical traits or senses (glasses/contacts, prosthetics, wheelchairs)?

What unifying characteristics set them apart from humans? What do they have in common?

What dietary needs do they have?

Do they use special ornamentation (clothing, jewelry, tattoos) to show rank, occupation, heritage, etc.?

How do they relate to temperature or climate?

Do they have joints or tendons that move in a way that would seem unnatural to humans?

What is their sexual biology like? Is it analogous to ours, or something entirely different?

What recreational activities are healthy/positive for their biology?

How does their body respond to various types of excitement or emotion?

Creative exercises for species/racial development:

If someone were write a wanted poster for a criminal of this race, what features would the notice highlight? Why?

What are (or hypothetically would be) the most popular plastic surgeries among people of this species?

What is their average morning routine? How do their care for themselves, physically, on a daily basis?

Write a short story in which someone of your new species/race attempts to put on a set of human clothes or visa versa. 

What is the most popular sport and how is it played? How do the species’ unique traits play into the game, if at all?