LIME!

Haiii my diagnosis is debated on the legitimacy of its intersex status but I’m literally on hormone replacement therapy for it so idc

Secondly my form of intersexism causes me to have a lot of gender dysphoria in a complicated way where some of the things my body decides to do are fine and some of it causes me pretty intense dysphoria (like facial hair, hair loss, other masculinization) where things like body hair and deepening of my voice I’m very prideful of (I did use to be insecure of my voice so I’d pitch it up in my earlier music). I don’t identify as a trans woman but a lot of my experience bodily and medically is a bit adjacent to trans women so a lot of my songs I think resonate with trans women as well

I’m also a nonbinary femme lesbian and my gender is very influenced both by my intersexism and my sexuality being exclusionary to men (I think unfortunately a lot of woman are taught to base their womanhood off of how theyre perceived by men or how attractive they are to men so to be outside of that makes my relationship to womanhood drastically different). so my relationship to womanhood and femininity are very complex I suppose. I’m also neurodivergent in a way that causes me to mask and my mask is definitely trying to uphold femininity and what a “woman is suppose to be” (trying to unlearn this)

I find that my obsession to perform femininity driven by my dysphoria and masking has added to my objectification by men who assume I’m performing my gender for them somehow. I think often times people in my position look to men for validation for how well they perform femininity and so men think they’re gracing me with their approval but I’m not attracted to men or interested in their opinions at all.

In my song “itsonlyagirlifyoucanhavesexwithit” it talks about how the logistics of being a woman is kind of unachievable even to cis women like having a 30 inch hip and DD tits is nearly impossible without surgery and something unhealthy going on. Ironically tho the rest of the song is about me being fetishized for being fat by a classmate I had in college. Basically skinny or fat as long as they see u as a woman ur being objectified in some way