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Lost re-watch | 5x14 | The Variable

You don’t seem afraid at all. I don’t understand that. Well, fear’s sort of an odd thing. When I was in residency, my first solo procedure was a spinal surgery on a 16-year-old kid. A girl. And at the end, after thirteen hours, I was closing her up, and I — I accidentally ripped her dural sac. Shredded the base of the spine where all the nerves come together. Membrane, stenos tissue and … So it ripped open. Nerves just spilled out of her like angel hair pasta. Spinal fluid flowing out of her, and I … And the terror was just so … crazy, so real. And I knew I had to deal with it. So I just made a choice. I’d let the fear in. Let it take over. Let it do its thing. But only for five seconds. That’s all I was gonna give it. So I started to count. One, two, three, four, five. And it was gone. I went back to work, sewed her up, and she was fine.

Lost re-watch | 5x4 | The Little Prince