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Dude, I had so many classmates in elementary school who played softball.how....how many do u think are lesbians now?

Do you think companies in the 2000s/2010s had any clue what XD means? or did they just say “well the kids are saying it, lets name rename the channel to Disney XD” like if they knew it was a face, they would have animated it that way.

I’m held captive by a stuffed animal. Percy, my stuffed stegosaurus fell onto me in such a loving way and he seems so happy just to be snuggling with me. I wanna take a shower but I don’t wanna see the sad look on his face when I pick him up and put him aside. and it’s not like he has the ablity to decide to do smth else after a while. so I’m just gonna snuggle for another hour

dude, if you’re paraplegic and a cat falls asleep on your leg, can u just take it off? like go about your life without disturbing the cat? is this a secret superpower? like if you can, they can keep sleeping AND you can go get the thing and come right back!

growing up, ive had actual people with obvious crushes on me, and like they’ve told me, had friends tell me, etc some confessed it, and everything. but like ????? I????? Still??? Don’t??? Think????? anyone???? could???? ever???? like???? me???? That????? way????????????

earth quakes are just the planet’s twitches

you know, I hear CBT and go “ah yes cognitive behavioral therapy” and then realize that what I’m thinking about has nothing to do with the subject and then spend a full minute confused before i remember people actually have.....intimate preferences and I have to deal with the fact that I live in a world with these people

You know that feeling when you finish looking through/watching smth wholesome like bob ross and then u return to your regularly scheduled memes and spend 15 minutes in wholesome mindset expecting every meme to be nice and happy and then the joke is super dark and you get whiplash. here’s a good transition space.