Shmeegally dee

When you’re in a rut, get out and keep walking if you fall again remember; if you can pick yourself up once you can do it again 

today was just another day. I met one of my husbands new friends from his new jobs.. seems eh sketch.. I have so much school work to do but not enough time or mentality. I do have motivation to get my degree but i hate writing so many notes. I’m an online student so its harder to type notes. today is tech yesterday but i haven't slept yet so i cant say a day has past. I hope one day i can own my own home and live life the way i always dreamed it would be..

Stay safe everyone...

wubba lubba dub dub 

I think that as humans we shouldn't be able to see color. color has always had a hold on us, when color shouldn't have the power to make us who we are. Color has decided what gender wears what, how cool you are based on the colors you wear, how you are treated, the way someone looks at you, and the way that society thinks of you. As a female who loves blue and thinks that boy clothes are more comfortable, i am judged everyday as lesbian, tom boy, trans, and unprofessional. I am a married woman who is bi but i love to get my hair and nails done. I also am a woman that rather be able to fit things in my pockets than carry a purse. 

Do you ever live in constant fear because of your past? i do. i may have had a hard life. a behavioral and mental health past because of a bad divorce with my parents, constant moving and being split between both parents. should this make me a bad person? does it make me a bad person?... as i got older i got smarter and decided to get long term help. i am better now.. living on my own, married to my high school sweetheart,have a job, and even some amazing fur babies.... am i a better person? does this mean that i can move on? Let me answer these questions for you.. 

Yes, i live in constant fear, anxiety and stress because my past follows me where ever i go. 

Am i a bad person? no i am not. i try my best to always keep a smile on my family and friends faces. i am always helping people if i can. i may have skipped school and acted out but i was a child with no support or proper parental guidance.

can i move on? i have not been in trouble since i was 16 i am now going to be 24 in October. My past will not let me move on. my past defines who i am as a person... 

Hi, my name that I go by is Shmeegals. I don’t want to say my real name in case i never make it famous. I love to write and draw and i figure a page that isnt to popular will be the best place. I have come here to share my stories and my thoughts. i want to make it like a personally diary in a way. I may even write my book on here. I do have a wattpad account buti havent added to it in a long time. I am hoping to gain some fans on here and inspiration. I hope everyone likes what they see.