morgan malaprop.

I wanna get buff. It’s one of my few wishes in life. I need to be able to lift my friends up both emotionally and physically. I do not, however, want to Ever do Any exercise in my life.

Man sees crab for the first time.

if i have a daughter im going to name her lizard and then she’ll get the nickname liz and everyone will be like “oh is it short for elizabeth?” and she will have to say “no my name is lizard”

So you telling me that my fruit got fruit

What

it's only inedible if ur a fucking coward

i arrive at my local petsmart and purchase the pogchamp food for my pond pogchamps

spirits of hunger and feasting

no white gay boy will ever reblog this, watch:

no white gay will reblog this

no white lgb person will reblog this

Without Stonewall, without the efforts of Marsha P. Johnson and Sylvia Rivera, the LGBTQ Community wouldn’t be where it is today. Don’t forget the roots, don’t forget the catalyst.

For the record, they were arguing over *whether or not they should get married*. She was pro, he was con, saying that if they loved each other the ring and the marriage certificate were unnecessary, that their love would be the commitment they needed. This was a fight they’d had for weeks. He didn’t just propose to shut her up in a totally unrelated argument…. him proposing was also him saying “you’re right, you won the argument” and that’s why this is cute.