I quit
For the past seven years, Iâve been told to basically change who I am because thereâs someone out there who canât handle the entirety of me. During those years, I tried to adapt myself, âtoneâ down who I am to fit their expectations, and do things to please others because I often feel like my intentions were not properly understood. And to be honest, I was slowly losing myself in the process.
I thought the women before me had already paved the way, wherein your strong personality wouldnât be a hindrance to your growth, but I misunderstood that one. Thereâs still a huge wall to break through so that âyouâ will never have to âtoneâ it down. I witnessed some of the worst work ethic Iâve ever imagined; a manager who micromanaged their directs, someone who badmouth everyone and everything, someone who always demanded more even tho they delivered so little, someone who doesnât know where and when to say things but was never reprimanded because they are âa performer and the team couldnât succeed without themâ (what an entitlement right?), a very chill boss who doesnât care at all, name it, probably I saw the worst of every generation Iâve worked with. But those seem to be acceptable rather than having a strong personality.
Donât get me wrong, I am not so close to being a perfect individual but I know my place. Iâm not saying Iâm better than them but I know I am better off without them. Imagine promoting a âcultureâ up there but down here itâs a different story. People donât leave nowadays because of compensation, personally, Iâve been ok having what I have despite being underpaid (I know I was giving more than what I currently received among my peers, I know the ins and outs of operation because I was once part of it, I deliver above the bar, Iâm on my peak, but under compensated). What I canât handle is everyone was always looking and talking about their retirement and they are better doing things the way it used to. My retirement is so far off that I canât see myself growing surrounded by these thinking.
Thatâs why I never bring my entire self to work ever since. Aside from the fact that they donât deserve the entirety of me, they canât handle it.
Iâve worked my way through. Iâm always on top of everything, and I observe every little thing. I guess thatâs my thing, I always observe. Itâs in my nature to always want to contribute something and leave a legacy behind. When I got some space at the table, I knew I could really contribute something here, so I worked hard and smart. I know with this role, all of my greatest aspects will be developed. I write well, concisely, and simply. My MBA papers contributed much to how I write materials for my work. Iâm agile, got good learning habits, and I am a visionary. I know a lot of shortcuts, of systems, and Iâve dealt with enough kinds of people to excel here. When I started doing this, I knew what I wanted to transcend through my works. I set the bar a little bit higher than everyone else, and often used as a benchmark. But I didnât feel like I was doing enough. Or maybe I did, but I didnât get enough recognition for what I do (yeah, still underpaid). I am a performer, a combination of your star player and your rock star, but I didnât feel I was being guided to reach my peak.
And so I quit, I needed to change the environment.












