Here I am, composing a burlesque.

The problem is I always want to dm my mutuals some shit like "I consider you an ally to my cause"

Reblog to tell your mutuals "I consider you an ally to my cause"

yes im addicted to attention and orgasms and food and shiny jewlery and 7$ Iced Lattes. does that really not sound like an awesome lifestyle to you

pulling me back under you when i try to crawl away because i’m too sensitive is a quick and easy trick to make me feel like even more of a prey animal and i wholeheartedly support it

got a crick in my neck and a frog in my throat and a chip on my shoulder and a stick up my ass and now you're gonna stand there puttin words in my mouth? haven't I been through enough?

for reasons i can neither explain nor justify, ready player one is my favourite book of all time

I’m not only romantically obsessive but sexually obsessive. I can only get off to him now. He’s the only thing that can turn me on just right. If it’s a kink I can only fantasize about? All I can do is imagine me and him in every scenario. No one else can’t turn me on like him. Like his body, his face, his voice, like him.

"Orgasm that'll make you see god" except it's you realizing that the person making you feel this way is a god in your eyes and you want nothing more than to keep worshipping them.

Keeping Up Appearances but the Gallagher family from Shameless replace Hyacinth's birth family.

This is so fucking inherently British I can’t even

This is the kind of thesaurus stuff I've needed.