im so sorry if you feel offended, but he looks so cute (like a kid) in the latest chapters. I like him older

I think she texts him "what'd you think of that new horror film" and he says "haven't seen it I'll watch it on the plane" and then during the next plane ride Bood keeps asking him questions (Ilya is asleep) and Shane has to be like "sorry my Mom asked me to watch this movie. later" and it turns out it's really bad and Yuna hated it and Shane calls her in the hotel room and they bitch about it.

There is a hunger that lives within Shane. An unbearable void that he carries within him. A darkness that resides in the deepest recesses of his being. Most of the time it’s manageable, just a low thrum of longing in the pit of his stomach. Most days he can get on with his day-to-day activities without thinking about it too much. But that is only because every now and then, whenever he can truly get away, he gives in and lets the hunger gorge. Or: Ilya runs into Shane Hollander in a sex club in London, deep in subspace and desperately in need of aftercare.

idk if he was hoping for anything specifically, i don’t see ilya as like, an emotional planner. like he doesn’t visualize a future he just assumes he doesn’t have one. he has classic CPTSD where his time horizon is really short. it’s not just that he thinks he won’t survive, i think he fully cannot imagine himself in 15 years due to PTSD related concepts of self and time that are too complicated for me to write about right now because my brain is kinda scattered. anyways so he was scheming to get shane to spend the night but that was as far as his plan went. his grand plan was cuddles. and hot fish.

and ilya has that exact same subtly gobsmacked expression every time he does it

Nathan Gombert - Ballet National de Marseille - photo by Aytekin Yalçın

heated rivalry + text posts // part four.

every time when they come home ilya makes shane stand still, slides the pants slowly off the hips, peels the underwear off with his teeth, painstakingly undoes each shirt button while asking, "did you like your clothes, did you like showing off for me," and every time shane says "yes" and "thank you" and, if ilya's very lucky, "did i do good, did you like it," and then ilya has to kiss him and fold him onto the couch right there so he can say yes in all the languages he knows, his shane, stripped bare of everything, still murmuring into ilya's mouth "yours, yours, yours"

read on AO3

classic post rant quora phrase